Other/Weird - 154 Reviews

I wanted to share this with as many people as I could in the case that it actually tasted like kimchi. Within the last year or two I have really gotten into kimchi from, somehow, never having tried it for thirty years. Now any time it's on the menu I'll try and get it; that is if udon isn't on the menu. There is a restaurant not far from where Jay and I live that has kimchi udon and it is far from terrible. There is a kimchi soup called kimchi jjiGae that just rules. Tofu, pork, kimchi, spice, noodles and rice cakes: the whole thing.

So now you know my recent new love. Big deal, right? Well it's important to have an appreciation for kimchi before you drink this because it tastes just like kimchi. I'm not kidding. It tastes like someone juiced kimchi and added a sprinkle of sugar and carbonated it. It's frighteningly accurate. It's good in that it tastes like what it's supposed to but what it is supposed to taste like is not a carbonated, sweetened drink.

It is what it is but what it is just shouldn't be.

Life has been hectic lately; your job has been crazy and you're boss has been on you all week about the Johnson report, the snow melted and flooded your basement, and on top of that you're kid has been acting like a real jerk. You my friend need to stop and smell the proverbial roses. Actually, why don't you take that a step further and drink those self same botanicals. Blossom Water makes it easy for you with their lemon rose water.

I've been putting off drinking this for a few weeks, because my head was filled with thoughts of old lady perfume, and I certainly don't want that in my mouth. I finally sucked it up today, quite literally. I was pleasantly surprised to discover that while this did not taste like formal date night at the local seniors home, it did taste exactly how a rose smells. I've never actually tasted a rose before, but no one can argue that they do not have a very distinct smell. This beverage is that smell distilled.

It's strange that this smells more of lemon than any sort of flower, but the taste is all rose, with a little bit of erythritol to sweeten it up. The lemon is completely overshadowed by the creepily accurate (at least I assume) rose flavor. The first couple of sips leave you feeling like there is no way you could drink an entire bottle, even though the taste is surprisingly pleasant. I thought that maybe I'd get through a third of the bottle, but now that I'm there I've become acclimated to it, and I just want to keep going. There is something with these Blossom Water drinks that is right on the money, and I hope their empire grows and grows.

If you're going to add flowers to any beverage, the safe bet is to use jasmine. It's been a staple of Chinese tea for thousands of years. It's also lighter on the floral taste than some others. Jasmine tea is the gateway drug into other botanical beverages. While there is no tea contained in this bottle, the same logic stands. If you wanted to buy a Blossom Water for someone who was not familiar with floral drinks, this would be the one to start with. The taste of the jasmine is more in the after taste, and it's not as intense as the others are. Its taste is extremely pleasant.

The base of this drink is a plum flavored water that has been sweetened with agave and erythritol (even though you can't taste it at all). The fruit flavoring is stronger than normal flavored water, but it's not nearly strong enough to be considered any sort of juice. I would also like to clarify that the plum used in here is the type that you could find in any grocery store in America. That is an important note of distinction because I've had some drinks from the Asian market that say they are plum flavored and they taste like moldy meat. They are obviously the grossest things ever. I assure you that there was not one second while I was sipping on this beverage that the word “gross” crossed my mind.

Overall this is a near perfect drink that you can slowly sip as you sit back and relax, to contemplate your day. I know I have said similar things about their other flavors, but man, that is exactly how this drinks make me feel.

Look America, some things just aren't for you and your palate of hamburgers. There is an ever-growing population of people that aren't from "these here parts" and they are integrating into our great country because of the opportunities and potential for greater thing. In doing so, they are bringing their food and culture to our doorstep and although we might not fully understand it, we should embrace it and give it a try. For the most part, we are welcomed with open arms if we're not going to be ignorant about it. Sure, at first glance, some of the clothes, accessories, customs, and beliefs might seem strange, but I'm sure that ours seem that way to them.

No I did not grow up on rice and rose water. I don't have a taste for it, but this site has allows me to try out things that are normal in other cultures. This, for instance, is one of those things.

Given to me by a girl who grew up surrounded by ex-pats of India. She said that she drank this all the time and when she found out about the site, she generously brought this for me. I have sat on it for a long time but I quite literally dusted it off and made a glass tonight to ponder over while listening to Incognito's "Beneath The Surface" which is a work of art in itself.

I've had rose lassi and that simply is not for me. Oh I "get" it but it's just not for me. This, though...this I could get used to. Sipping in those hot summer months while mulling over different fruits and botanicals. It's lightly sweetened and highly concentrated. It has a bit of "rose" to it but there is more going on in this little glass of mine. It's rose, it's fruity, and although it doesn't have any in it, it almost has a taste of cinnamon or something. It is a very complex taste that is rose first but complex if you try to figure out what else is in there.

Now I just made this with water but there are plenty of other applications for this including mixing it with milk to make a creamier drink or put it on ice cream as a topping. I don't know if I would do that here in the States but if I was ever lucky enough to take a trip to India or date an Indian woman who's family made good Indian food, I would try it there all day long.

Pomegranates? Love them. I just found out that fifty percent of my boss' do not like pomegranates. What's not to like? Is it the work? There are a couple tricks but I think, like most things, if you put forth some time and effort, the reward, in this case little exploding balls of juice, they pay off. I don't know what his problem is about pomegranates.

Geraniums? I've had chrysanthemum tea before so what's a geranium got that's any different?

I thought this would be a light floral tea but I was a bit off. It's teetering on the fence between light flavored water and grandma bathwater. I am giving it the benefit of the doubt because I think this was a bit expensive. I don't want to spend like three dollars on a drink and be wishy-washy on it. Therefore, not bath water.

Tasting it with the grain of salt I have given it, it's not too bad. It tastes like a pomegranate flavored water with a hint of floral stuff mixed in for fun. It is as good as that can be. It's different and I feel like big companies don't play with flavors like this. Jay drank the grapefruit lilac and gave it a top rating. I wish I could have drunk it because I find this a bit lacking.

I'm not going to kid myself; the majority of the people in at the world are going to scoff at the idea of a beverage flavored to taste like flowers. Joe and Jill Everyman are going to have no interest in such a drink, and if it were to show up in convenient store all over the country, there would be a lot of dusty bottles laying around just waiting to spoil. I guess that would be true until the stores decided to mark them down to close to nothing and I would go and buy them up, because they are delicious. If people were willing to give it a try, chances are they would also love it.

The contents of this bottle mostly taste like an agave sweetened, very light grapefruit juice (there's erythritol in there as well, but try as I might I can't taste it). The main flavor of the grapefruit is there, but the tartness is nowhere to be found. Slightly below that is the floral taste of the lilac. It's not floral in a perfume or soap sort of way. It's there in its most calming form. If I sit with the aftertaste I get the taste of the smell of lilacs on my mind. To some that may sound absolutely horrible, but to me it is perfect.

This drink has a flavor that I associate with not having a care in the world. It makes me think about relaxing outside under the shade of a tree, perhaps reading a book. It gives the hope of warmer weather on a day that is blustery and cold. If you see this, don't be a prude. Give it a try and hopefully you'll fall in love.

It's no secret that the three of us here at Thirsty Dudes do not partake in alcoholic beverages. We're not jerks about it, it's just not for us. To paraphrase, “You're fun is not our fun.” When RESQWATER sent us some samples, we contemplated what to do. In the past we have had some friends get wasted and drink the product and give us a review of how it worked with us touching base about the flavor. It was a fun exercise, but to be honest it took a long time to come to fruition. People are busy, and our friends are older and not getting wasted all the time, we get it.

For this review we decided to take it another way. If I understand things correctly, a big part of what makes a hangover is dehydration. To mimic this, I ate obscene amounts of salsa with chips that were far to salty to be anything close to healthy, but tasted so darn good. In the past this combination has led me to feeling like crap the following morning, and I was told that I had the same symptoms of a hangover. So I did what I had to in order to replicate the scenario, you know like a reenactment on some crime show that is always on the TV. Yes, I know this is not exactly the same, but it's what we did, so deal with it.

I can tell you, my experiment worked. After being a complete glutton last night, I woke up feeling like cold diarrhea on a paper plate. Ugh. I got up sat around for a short while and then downed a bottle of RESQWATER.

First off, this does not smell pleasant. Actually maybe it's not all that unpleasant of a scent, but it's not what I want to smell when I'm about to drink something. It's something like a combination of fruit, vitamins, some sort of marinade and possibly meat. It's a weird smell that I was not expecting at all. The smell vaguely translates into the taste, but luckily it's not in a vomit inducing way. Mostly it tastes like a Vitamin Water version of prickly pear, but with a slightly stronger flavor. There is a bit of an adult vitamin taste to it as well, but it's sweet enough to mostly bury it.

This could be much worse, but overall it's nothing that I would drink for pleasure, which I assume wouldn't be the healthiest decision anyways. I would certainly drink it again if I ever woke up feeling like I did today. It didn't take all that long for my body to start feeling normal again after downing this. For all of you prone to hangovers due to your late night decisions, I suggest you keep a supply of this on hand.

Did mango make some back door deal in order to blend so well with erythritol? While it is one of the least offensive zero calorie sweeteners on the market, it normally has a very distinct taste. When it's hanging around mango, it's not as apparent. Did they meet to exchange documents for cold hard cash in some dirty, dark parking garage? Did they use fake gruff voices until one of them inevitably coughed? Were Nixon masks worn? Was it all done to finance a surfing expedition? Find out the answers to all of this and more next week on the Adventures of Sneaky Pete (and Pete).

I have surprisingly been a fan of this line of beverages. The concept of oats, fruit juice and zero calorie sweeteners being mixed together didn't exactly produce a Pavlovian response from me. I guess that is because I haven't had the proper conditioning, which as it turns out simply means trying the drinks.

This tastes like a decent mango juice with a slight hint of erythritol, but as I said it's not all that bad. There is a very light oat taste to it as well. I originally expected some sort of texture, but it's as smooth as can be. The amount you taste the oats is similar to how any drink would taste if you drank it while hanging out in a horse barn. The association of the smell of that dwelling would impact your taste buds as much as the oats in this juice do.

Oh and the spoiler is that Pete is sneaky because he added oats to his drinks and you wouldn't know unless you were told. You should still watch the show though, from what I hear there will be “sexy results!!!”

When I was in college, pretty exclusively now that I think about it, I ate a lot of oatmeal. It was cheap. Yes I ate my fair amount of ramen but that comes with the territory. Had I known that ten years later I would be drinking oats, I would tell you that would be disgusting. Was ignorant, uneducated, me right? Future, smart, attractive me says, "Eh, 70%."

What you've got is an artificially sweetened apple juice that tastes more like a weak cider than an apple juice which actually give it a better rating that if it were just apple juice flavored apple juice. Where did that extra 30% go? Well it's simple. If you artificially flavored plastic beads to taste like artificially sweetened, light apple cider, you would have it. I can't pinpoint what makes that true but it is as true as non-provable stats can be.

You were close Sneaky Pete, but you left the bottle in the sun too long and let it infuse itself into your drink.

Patrick! What is this garbage? I leave you alone with the business for two weeks so I can have my first vacation in twenty years and I come home to you ruining my company! I wrote you out very specific instructions on how to make our beverages. They were all layed out for you line by line, and it took up only half of a page, yet you still couldn't follow it. You think you know oats better than your brother? You think you know oats better than Pete!?!? I spent years working on this recipe to make sure everything was exactly right. You come in for two weeks, and decide you can do better and throw the instructions out the window? What made you think that making a vat of oatmeal with double the water and just throwing a handful of grapes into the mix would make for a good beverage? What you've created is a gross sludge that no one in their right minds would want to ingest.

You see when done correctly, following my instructions I might add, the oatmeal is not the base for the drink. It's more of a watery juice. Don't get me wrong it has a strong white grape flavor that almost tastes like “original” aloe juice, it just has to be fairly liquidy because when you add in the powdered oats, it needs a little extra fluid to absorb them, so the drink doesn't become too thick. Actually when done correctly the results shouldn't have a consistency all that different from peach juice, you know just a little thicker than water.

If what you created wasn't bad enough, you also didn't even properly mix in the sweetener. I use a mixture of erythritol, evaporated cane juice and stevia in my products It gives it less calories, without tasting too diet. In yours you just through in regular sugar and it's in there in big clumps. Everything about what you have done is wrong and gross.

I wish I could divorce you from being my brother. If this was some sort of retribution prank, you have done terribly. Pranks need to be smarter and well thought out, you know sneaky like I would do. That is why I am called Sneaky Pete. Maybe we should just start calling you Mean Spirited, Lazy Patrick. How would you like that?

Ugh. I'll have to dump this all out and start over. Grab one of the bottles I made before I left from the cooler. See how this is actually a drink and not just slop that isn't fit to feed a pig? You really are the worst Patrick, now get out of my factory and tell mom it looks like I'm going to be late for family dinner, and that she has you to thank for that.

I was just saying the other day that I was wondering what the elixir of life was. Finally, an answer to this age old question. Sure, some might think that it's water, or water infused with gold and diamonds, but they would be wrong. The true elixir of life is, apparently, a spicy, Indian inspired, coconut drink. I know; we were way off until this point.

What do I think of the elixir of life? Well, I don't think that I'm going to live that long if this is what we've got. Yes, as expected, this is a little spicy, pretty tangy, and doesn't taste that much like coconut water. All good, right? Sure if you hate the actual taste of the drink and love the delectable, rare exotic spice called salt. I'll say it, and parents cover your kids' ears; this is a salty bitch of a drink. I wanted this to taste more like Indian food and peppers and all of the ingredients on the side but instead I got something that felt like whatever reverse blood pressure medicine would taste like if you poured all your spices from your spice cabinet into a bottle of cold water.

Even with doing that, which this company did not do, you do get a little bit of goodness in every sip but I could take about half a dozen sips of this before I, aloud, questioned what I was doing drinking this. It's quasi-drinkable but you've really got to have a dead palate to get past its downfall. And let's be honest, if you can't taste anything, you should not be wasting your money on drinks like this.

We took the plunge. This is a real 1% drink. Remember last year's 99% versus 1% debate? Well I'm bringing it back because unless you are making $250,000 per year, you don't really have any business buying twelve dollar drinks. I don't mean to be rude, but I'm trying to make it so you can afford to put bread on the table. For the cost of this drink, you can put three loaves of bread on the table. That would feed your carbohydrate hungry family for quite a while or just quench your thirst, oddly, for an hour or two.

"Special birthday drink" aside, let's get into the nitty gritty of this beverage and no, I am not using that phrase lightly. Upon inspection of this drink of the shelf, you will notice that it is, like the other BluePrint drinks, a sixteen ounce bottle with lettering that makes it look like one of those hip hop shirts from the mid-2000's. You know, the ones that say things like, "Dre, Easy, Ren, Ice" and you are supposed to know, "Oh, that's NWA." You should know that's NWA but that's beyond the point.

Anyhow, you're looking at the bottle and you turn it upside down and there is three quarters of an inch of white sludge on the bottom. It looks almost like paste. It shakes up just fine but man, it is sludgy as can be. You shake her up and smell it and...well...it's like if your three year old son made you a drink comprised of paste and milk. That's two out of the five senses.

You say to yourself, "I spent an hour's worth of money on this drink, I'm going to drink the whole thing. You take a sip and it does not taste like milk paste but it tastes like the milk after a heaping bowl of Cinnamon Toast Crunch, also known as Jay Draper's favorite cereal. There is sense number three.

Number four is touch which I should put in quotes because you are feeling it with your tongue. It is a gritty son of a gun. I assume it is the handful of cashews that were murdered to make this drink. It tastes a bit sandy but it's cinnamon, nut flavored sand so it's alright. You know it's not going to hurt you so you are fine with your newly sanded esophagus.

I suppose we could have put our ears to this drink and said, "Sense five is that it doesn't sound like anything." but that would be a cop out. We could also go the more new age way and say that we heard it "calling us." but we're not really that type of guys.

Four out of five senses were used in the drinking of this and the flavor itself would get a three out of five but in terms of uniqueness and quality it has earned another bottle.

It's been sad times out on the old horse farm. You see horse thieves have come by and done what they do and now the farm is horseless. I know horse thieves in this day and age? It's a sad but true reality in the world that we live in. Without the ridiculous amounts of money that the owners pulled in from all of those 4H shows at county fairs, they don't know how they are going to make ends meet. The mortgage is due, the electricity is in fear of being shut off and everyone's bellies are rumbling. One would think that a farm would have some sort of food growing, but you would be wrong. The only edible things on the entire farm are the bins of oats that were once used to feed the horses before they were thieved in the night.

They have been staving off hunger with a steady diet of oatmeal, but Teddy decided to use the oats to add a little something-something to his beverage. To begin with his drink was really nothing more that water, stevia and some natural peach flavoring (aka the ruminants of a can of peaches that he has been stretching for weeks. He was getting no nutritional value out of the drink, so he pureed a bunch of oats and mixed them in for fiber. As we all know fiber is a very important thing when your life is on a farm.

The results of his experiment were shocking. He had expected it to be a thick drink, with chunks of oats in it, kind of like the milk at the end of a bowl of granola. Apparently the house had a super blender, because it was pure liquid; there was not a single chunk to be found. The oat flavor was to a minimum as well; perhaps it was because it had been drying out in the bins for so long. It really just tasted like peaches and stevia albeit lightly. There was a slight oat flavor that could have been turned up a little bit more. It would have been nice for it to taste a little bit like oatmeal. Even though it was not what he expected Teddy proclaimed it to be “Oatstanding!,” to which all of the rest of the farms hands just shook their head and continues to bale hay for the ghost of horses past.

Remember when you asked for that drink that was made from oats that has a real 80's Prince vibe? Well also remember when I said that they'd never make it? Well I was wrong. They made it and they made it well. Sure, the entire song I was singing, both aloud and in my head is the titular track of the drink. That made it go down smoother but without it wouldn't have penalized too much.

This was good. I was leery because, well...oats. It's really hard for me to spell "oats" without putting an "e" in there in an homage to my favorite moustached man from a similar time period. Oh, if this drink were called "Sneaky Pete's Raspberry Beret Oatestanding Beverage" it would probably make me comatose with excitement.

Back to the drink and out of my dreams. It tasted like raspberry had a little bit of a thickness to it but not offensive, just thicker than, say, a water. Even though it was sweetened with Erythritol, you don't really get that. I thought it was cane sugar until I looked, actually.

Raspberry Maneater. I'm leaving you with that. Erotic One On One. Bonus.

Ahh, a bottle of vintage. I'll never forget those days, going to the grandparent's farmhouse during the hot summer months. Working with grandpa bailing hay, cutting dozens of acres of lawn, milking cows, and putting shoes on horses. The later was for fun. It wasn't actual horseshoes. It was my sister's shoes that she brought in case there was some sort of ho down at the town square that she needed to get all gussied up for. Imagine a pony wearing mid-sized heels. It's a treat to see. After a nice, moderate ten hour work day with pappy, he and I would go inside and talk about things like Bill Clinton, Atari, segregation in schools, apples, and the like. We would discuss these topical issues over a nice bowl of turkey caramels until it was time to go to sleep. Ahh those caramels. Nothing is quite as refreshing as sugar free turkey caramels. It just hits the spot after you have a nice turkey dinner with mashed potatoes and peas. You know how awful it is to eat a meal and then wash it down with something that doesn't taste like what you just ate. Oh, I hate it. If I just ate a hamburger, I wish there were some sort of hamburger ice cream that I could eat to keep my palate just where it was.



Pappy, if you're reading this, I don't miss those days and although my friends say that I was missing my youth, I thought that there is only one way to have such course, calloused hands and strong work ethic at ten. Those kids that were spending their youth playing football, having sleepovers, listening to pop music; those kids are soft. We, you and I, we are strong independent men who can take care of ourselves with the lay of the land. Animals? I'll milk 'em all of the day. We're men, pappy. All because of our talks and those delicious salty turkey caramel filled nights.

There comes a time when mankind makes something that is not needed/wanted. Jones fulfilled this prophecy by creating this monster of a soda.

*Editors note: in the beginning of the video, Mike thinks I say it's in a can but I was trying to say that it was an exclusive to Canada but I don't know how to talk on video because I get nervous.

Without further adieu, here is a video of us drinking this collection of fries, gravy, and cheese curds in a bottle.



Jones Poutine soda was easily the worst soda I've ever had. It's been hours since I drank it and my stomach still hurts and I still feel like I'm going to throw up. I appreciate that Jones sent this to us, but on the other hand I feel like they played a huge elaborate prank on us.

90% Hydrated Chia. 90%. Do you realize how many chia seeds that is. Can you even comprehend how many green coats that could grow for porcelain sheep? Well, the answer is probably one. It takes a buttload of those seeds to grow a healthy coat, but still that is such a high percentage of a “solid” to be in a beverage. I say solid, but they are extremely fluid. It still feels like your drinking something with a thicker consistency than most drinks. You don't even realize the chia seeds are solid until you stop them with your tongue and press on them. You know, like a child playing with their food, which is what I always like to do.

This is mostly honey and secondarily pineapple. I would have preferred it the other way, but I have no real complaints. The honey taste isn't like eating straight honey, but it's more like when you use honey to sweeten tea; you know the flavor involved is honey, but it tastes different than that last spoonful you put directly into your mouth instead of your teacup.

It's fun. It's tasty. It's healthy. What else could you want, well except for a stronger pineapple flavor? Now I'm just being picky.

I haven't even opened this drink yet and I'm already both terrified and excited. Look at the list of random ingredients on the front of the bottle:

• Ashwagandha


• Yerba Mate


• Tulsi


• Turmeric


• Ginger


• Cardamom


• Spearmint


• Coconut Nectar


• Coconut Oil


• Lemon


• Sea Salt


• Black Pepper


• Cinnamon

I opened this up and it literally looked like curry. So much turmeric floating at the top Then I gave it a smell and it smelled like curry with a good amount of cinnamon and ginger. After reading that long list of ingredients I thought for sure one of them was going to stand out, but it's literally a wave of different tastes. One sip the ginger and cinnamon stood out, but the next the black pepper burned my lips. As far as weird drinks go, this is at the top of the list.

The problem is, I don't know whether I love it or hate it. It's definitely a sipping drink. Unless you are a masochist, I wouldn't advise you drink this in one shot. I'm sure this drink is really good for you, but I don't think I could stomach drinking the whole thing.

Honey, why is all my stuff on the front yard? What?!? I would never try and poison you. Where is this coming from? What do you mean we're breaking up? We were looking at houses yesterday. I don't get it. Please! Slow down and tell me what's going on here. I see that my favorite fish vase is broken so you must mean business because you know how much that means to me. No, I promise you, my love, I didn't not try to poison you. Spider eggs? Where? In the drink? No, those weren't spider eggs. They were chia seeds. I saw that drink at the market and though you would like it. It's supposed to be good for you and I know how much you like blackberries. Didn't you read the ingredients? You just assumed that it was spider eggs and I was trying to kill you? No, that's crazy talk, baby. Do you have the bottle? It's in the garbage? Hold on a second. I'll get it.

Alright, right here, read this. It's chia seeds. It's chocked full of good stuff that is good for you. I thought you would appreciate it. It's low in calories and actually tastes good. It's lightly sweetened with a pretty good blackberry flavor and you get a nice lime aftertaste. Yes, you can taste the Stevia in the aftertaste, too, but it's hardly a make or break. It's just kind of reminding you that it's in there helping a sister out. Honey. Please. We've been through so much together. I can't believe you thought I would try to serve you spider eggs. I can't believe you thought that I thought that I would get away with it. Maybe we should break up. The trust level just isn't where I feel comfortable. Thanks for getting all my stuff out of the house. This actually makes it easier. That backfired on your part, didn't it? Nice knowing you sweetheart. I'll take that bottle of Chia Star since you're clearly not going to drink it.

I have had a turmeric drink before and it tasted like water strained through a handful of Indian food. I really like Indian food. Jay and myself frequent Indian restaurants a lot but I'll tell you right here and now, I don't want to drink it. This drink, as Jay has mentioned every drink that cannot be reiterated enough is that this drink is not for everyone. It's spicy and does have a rather peculiar taste. That's taking into consideration that every ingredient under the sun inside of it. Spicy ones. Exotic ones. Fresh ones. Look at the bottle. There are ten or so ingredients that you wouldn't put into a drink yourself but they did.

What do I think of it? Well I'll tell you. You have a drink that is a good dinner drink because it is spicy and is almost a meal in itself. It's not think or chunky but you sip it so it takes a while to get through it. It's also not really sweet, regardless of the honey, so I don't know if you would spend time mulling over this drink. Well, maybe you would. I think that you and a friend could sit down and watch some fancy foreign film and split this with a friend. I could not drink this whole thing myself. I know Jay can't either because I went to his house and he gave me some of a drink that he reviewed a day before.

This is one of the strangest drinks we have had on Thirsty Dudes only because it's so complex. I welcome more drinks like this onto our not-award-winning-in-a-long-time website.