Kahe - 3 Reviews

Johnny was a masochist. He would go to S&M clubs many nights and would enjoy being hit by whips. It might not make sense to you, but you're not Johnny. He would come home battered and bruised three to four days a week. He would always wear collared, long sleeved shirts so no one was the wiser. He worked as an accountant in the big city and didn't want others to know what he did in his personal time.

On his way home from Whipped Into Shape, one of his frequent clubs, he was a bit parched and headed into a small corner store to get something to drink. He was going through a bit of a passionfruit kick so when he saw Kahe's passionfruit drink, he had to get it.

He went home, checked out his new gnarly bruises and welts, and then cracked open his new drink and had at it. It was like a free admittance to another S&M club because this drink was bad, but he kept going back for more. It was tart, didn't taste like passion fruit, and was poorly, artificially sweetened. Every time he took another sip, he would make a strange face of disgust, but for reasons beyond his knowledge, he kept drinking it.

Although he prefers the clubs, he now knows that anytime he can't make it, he can pick up a bottle of that sparkling fruit juice and have twelve ounces of sadomasochism.

Cherries. Red gold. It is currently summer, also knows as the summer of sticker shock when you put a pound of delicious cherries in a bag, weigh them and get presented with a $32 price tag. I don't know why. Reason number 1 is because I don't work in the cherry industry, and two because I feel like I have seen like a trillion cherries on a tree and I just can't justify that absurd price. I'm cheap, that also doesn't help.

This drink brings the delightful taste of bing cherries to your fridge year round...kind of. The initial taste, like four seconds, is a lovely cherry taste. I'm not the master of cherries, and I don't claim to be, but it does taste like cherries, no doubt. Then Xylitol and Stevia kick in and ruin the party. They're like that duo of jerks that come to your party, bring beer, and somehow rip one of the couch cushions, getting you in trouble with your parents. You don't need that. I typically like what Stevia does for drinks, but this one doesn't make the cut.

Cherry lovers, this is still a drink for you. People who like cherries, "Cherry likers", give it a whirl. People apathetic about cherries; move on to something else, like therapy because cherries are pretty delicious.

The potential for these Kahe drinks was through the roof. An all-natural kiwi soda sounded like a dream come true. I've always wanted a bottle of straight kiwi juice, almost as much as I want a bottle of cantaloupe juice. I don't think either is destined to happen though.

They started this off right. They took some carbonated water and added a bunch of kiwi juice concentrate to it. I'm pretty sure they could have stopped right there and I would have loved this drink. Sure it wouldn't have been overly sweet, but it would have been enough for me and it would have tasted like fruit. Instead of quitting while they were ahead Kahe decided to add a low calorie sweetener, or two to be exact. I'm all for low cal drinks. I completely understand that this country has a severe sugar problem. I suffer from it myself. I also salute stevia for being one of the only "diet" sweeteners that I can really stand. The problem with it is that it can be overpowering if there's not much else to cover it up. Since this was just water and juice the stevia and xylitol completely took over the flavor of the drink. It tastes like it's 2 parts sweetener to every one-part juice. As a result the wonderful kiwi flavor becomes hidden and you have to search it out underneath the added sweetness and the drink drops in ratings.