Stacker2 - 5 Reviews

We need to come up with a new drink that the kids will love. Energy drinks seem to be all the rage lately, so lets make one of those. We need a good tag line too. Awesome energy? Nah. Radical energy? Nope, too 90's. I know, Extreme Energy! Kids these days love extreme sports so they have to love extreme energy. Now what flavors do we have to choose from? All we have is that gross raspberry one? Crap, even my dog doesn't like that. Hmmm, we'll have to think of a good nickname for the flavor so maybe they won't realize how bad it is. I know! Enraged Raspberry. And let's throw some Blue #1 in there to make it a cool blue color. Hmm, you're right that does kind of make it look like carbonated windshield washer fluid. Oh well, they won't notice because it will be in a can. Consumers are ignorant sheep anyways, we tell them what to buy and they do it. We could probably get away with selling actual windshield washer fluid as a drink just by labeling it "the most extreme drink you've ever tasted."

I've been craving candy lately. Sweet Tarts, Twizzlers, and Spree are usually my go-to candy. The problem is that the corner store by my house has all their candy behind the counter due to hooligans stealing it. I'm pretty comfortable with watching cartoons and drinking an obscene amount of soda at the age of 30, but for some reason I can't bring myself to ask the man behind the counter for a bag of Skittles.

But that's okay because thanks to energy drinks, I get my candy fix every once in a while because 99% of them are melted candy in a can. This one is Sweet Tarts, and it's great! It's got a bit of a gnarly diet aftertaste, but it's not as bad as most diet energy drinks.

When I was working at Fun Fun Fun Fest, someone came up to me and asked if I wanted a B12 shot. I said sure and followed them to the production trailer. When we got inside, I saw a doctor pulling needles out of a bag. When they said B12 shot, I thought they meant a drink like this. I hate needles so I opted out and went back to work.

Going in, I wasn't crazy about this flavor. I love pomegranate but HATE acai with a passion. I think it's one of the grossest tastes ever. That being said, this isn't as bad as I feared. It still has that gross flavor, but the pomegranate helps. It's not the most intense energy shot I've ever had, but that's probably because it's meant to be a vitamin shot, and the energy is just a secondary feature.

I've become pretty tolerant of energy shots in the past couple years. I don't feel like going back through all my reviews, but I'm guessing I've tried at least two-dozen different brands and flavors. Obviously some are better than others, but for the most part they are gross.

I found this one at the Dollar Store and I now know why. It has a gross chalky berry flavor that is just not appealing to me. Xtra Energy? More like Xtra gross.

Grape Kool-Aid. That's EXACTLY what this tastes like. Sure there's an aftertaste of nasty energy stuff that lingers in your mouth for a few minutes. But as many know, in the world of energy drinks (especially energy shots), it's hard to find one that doesn't taste like chemicals. Sure grape Kool-Aid isn't the greatest flavor of all time, but it's much better and tolerable than liquid death. I picked up a few different flavors of these energy shots at Dollar Tree last weekend. I feared them because Dollar Tree is usually the place where drinks go to die. This has renewed my faith in them and I look forward to trying the other flavors now.