Warheads - 2 Reviews

Mom? Here's what I want to do for my eighth birthday. I want to go to the zoo. I love the lizard room. You know me, mommy. I love the chameleons. Then, after that let's go to McDonalds. I would like a ten pack of McNuggets with both sweet and sour and barbeque sauces. It's my birthday. I love nuggets. Then I would like to go to the candy store and I want some Warheads. I enjoy putting two or three in my mouth and seeing if I can take it. This one time, at school, Michael K. said that he ate five of them and threw up. What? That's not gross. It's awesome.

What do you mean that the candy store is closed on Sunday? Who told you to have me on a Sunday?! My birthday doesn't happen on a Sunday every year? I guess I never thought of that. What am I going to do about my Warheads? You what?! You bought me a Warheads drink?! Mom! You are the coolest. I can't wait. Can I have one now? Thanks mom. You're the best. You're OK, too, dad.

This isn't bad. It's not like the candy, but it is a little sour. It tastes like a sweeter, more syrupy green apple Freeze-e-pop. I suppose since I'm seven I should like that sort of thing. I like playing in the dirt, baseball, hot dogs, and candy. That's my life.

Mom. I can't wait for my birthday. It's going to be so great except that I don't get the candy that I want. I do get other stuff and that I look forward to. Thank you in advance. You guys are alright.

I would like to start off by saying that I miss hot Warheads. Sure, sour might make a better drink, but as a candy, it was far more thrilling to have something burning your mouth than squeeze your cheeks together. I just had to get that out of the way. These kids and their sour candy don't know what we had to go through as kids. End transmission 1.

Begin transmission 2: This is just how you think it would be. It's sour, ultra tangy, and has that gross Sunny D sting. It's a bit reminiscent of the candy but less concentrated. The candy was fun because it was a game where the longer you kept it in your mouth the better or the more you can keep in your mouth the cooler and tougher you were. This is drinkable and totally drinkable. There's no game. That's what I liked about all branches of Warheads is the self-punishment of it all. I don't feel like I've earned anything but cavities when I drink this and it makes me sad and makes me miss my childhood. The black cherry flavor isn't bad and I'm sure that all kids would go bonkers over it. Oh man, remember Bonkers? Those were awesome. If they made a Bonkers drink, I would buy it and as gross as I know it would be, drink it.

This...eh. They've nailed their demographic. The demo that they used to have will get no love back because we're a generation of, "Their earlier stuff was better." Bunch of jerks if you ask me.