Arizona Virgin Coctail Pina Colada

You know who loved pina coladas? The Indians. Native Americans. Sorry. You think Arizona just arbitrarily put an Indian on the bottle? They had to earn it. For hundreds of years, Native Americans would ride on horseback from New Mexico to Puerto Rico in order to get authentic pina coladas. The horses never liked riding on the boats so often times they would have to let people in Cancun borrow their horses until they got back. Often times, they would come back and there would be ponies since they were gone enjoying pina coladas for so long. Once in Puerto Rico, they would order coconut after coconut filled with the milk as well as ground up pineapples and the finest rum that not a lot of money could by. They would fill their backsacks with coconuts right off the tree and pineapples off whatever pineapples come off of. I assume trees as well.

When the Native Americans heard that Arizona was making pina colada, they jumped on their horsies and rode to Arizona, only to find out that Arizona is actually based out of Upstate New York. They decided to just call them using their cellular phones and thank them. Arizona was so happy that the Indians liked their drink that they decided to take Stacy Keach off and replace it with the Indian leader at the time.

What the Indians liked about the Arizona is not only that it came in a resealable container, but that it used the finest coconuts like they got from Puerto Rico. The pineapple to coconut ratio was spot on and it was so well sweetened that it didn't need rum. They say that it gets to be a little too much for one person so they typically split it with their friends.

They thought that Arizona did such a nice job that they put one of their horses on a plane and shipped it to New York where Arizona built a nice employee ranch where they can go during lunch breaks and ride it and feed it out of their hands.