BluePrint Cashew Vanilla Cinnamon Agave

We took the plunge. This is a real 1% drink. Remember last year's 99% versus 1% debate? Well I'm bringing it back because unless you are making $250,000 per year, you don't really have any business buying twelve dollar drinks. I don't mean to be rude, but I'm trying to make it so you can afford to put bread on the table. For the cost of this drink, you can put three loaves of bread on the table. That would feed your carbohydrate hungry family for quite a while or just quench your thirst, oddly, for an hour or two.

"Special birthday drink" aside, let's get into the nitty gritty of this beverage and no, I am not using that phrase lightly. Upon inspection of this drink of the shelf, you will notice that it is, like the other BluePrint drinks, a sixteen ounce bottle with lettering that makes it look like one of those hip hop shirts from the mid-2000's. You know, the ones that say things like, "Dre, Easy, Ren, Ice" and you are supposed to know, "Oh, that's NWA." You should know that's NWA but that's beyond the point.

Anyhow, you're looking at the bottle and you turn it upside down and there is three quarters of an inch of white sludge on the bottom. It looks almost like paste. It shakes up just fine but man, it is sludgy as can be. You shake her up and smell it and...well...it's like if your three year old son made you a drink comprised of paste and milk. That's two out of the five senses.

You say to yourself, "I spent an hour's worth of money on this drink, I'm going to drink the whole thing. You take a sip and it does not taste like milk paste but it tastes like the milk after a heaping bowl of Cinnamon Toast Crunch, also known as Jay Draper's favorite cereal. There is sense number three.

Number four is touch which I should put in quotes because you are feeling it with your tongue. It is a gritty son of a gun. I assume it is the handful of cashews that were murdered to make this drink. It tastes a bit sandy but it's cinnamon, nut flavored sand so it's alright. You know it's not going to hurt you so you are fine with your newly sanded esophagus.

I suppose we could have put our ears to this drink and said, "Sense five is that it doesn't sound like anything." but that would be a cop out. We could also go the more new age way and say that we heard it "calling us." but we're not really that type of guys.

Four out of five senses were used in the drinking of this and the flavor itself would get a three out of five but in terms of uniqueness and quality it has earned another bottle.