Cascade Ice Sparkling Water Organic Lemon Zest

Ah the lemon zest; an attractive garnish on many of the dishes on the Food Network. They just take that lemon, roll it on a cutting board lifting the fruit from that pesky rind and then rub it against a grater like a bear scratching itself against a tree. I wonder if they have a slew of interns just rolling and grinding lemons all of the day for college credit. I think that they also might have entry level, minimum wage workers juicing all the zest into a little drink. Then, the full timers are bottles and packaging. Then, at the end of it all, is the big wigs. The big wigs sit back, smoke big, fat cigars and just count money all day.

What we're left with, in short, is a lemon seltzer water. All that zesting and bottling and smoking just leaves you with a bottle of fairly generic lemon seltzer. Look, it's fine. It's good, right? It's just lemon seltzer water. No need to beat around the bush. Get back to school so you can learn how to cut corners and hire the unhirable slobs that are college students and start learning to count to really high numbers because soon you, too will be swimming in dollar bills and small coins.