Cherry Republic Boom Chugga Lugga Cherry Root Bear

Maude, those darn bears are at it again. Last night they got into our cherry storeroom and all but cleaned it out. I think there was maybe one case of cherries that they didn't get to. The completely devoured the rest. I'm talking fruit, stems, seeds and all. There was just cherry juice smeared everywhere. Apparently that wasn't enough for them, because they then broke into the root beer storeroom in the next building over. I didn't know bears liked root beer, but I guess if they were going to you're brew would be the way to go honey. That latest batch tasted so dark in the best way possible. It's just nice and bold tasting. I mean we do live out in the country so a root beer made out here should taste that way.

Sorry I got distracted. Back to the bears. They got into the root beer room as I said, and they thrashed five of your barrels. I know how hard you worked on that soda Maude, and I'm sorry. I did tell you that we needed a new door on the room though. There is this one barrel that they left half empty. Ugh there is cherry juice all over it. This is going to be a pain to clean up. WHAT ARE YOU DOING MAUDE? DON'T DRINK THAT! BEARS DON'T USE STRAWS OR CUPS! DO YOU KNOW WHAT IS ON THEIR PAWS MAUDE? POOP AND DIRT AND WHO KNOWS WHAT ELSE! SHUT UP AND TASTE IT? ARE YOU CRAZY?!!?! WHERE ARE YOU GOING? WHERE!??!?!?!

*Maude comes back with a cup half full of mashed up cherries a few moments later. She opens another barrel of root beer and fills the cup the rest of the way.*

Wait this is delicious. Those bears are on to something! This is like 75% root beer and 25% cherry juice, and you can tell it's fresh. If we filter out the chunks we could definitely market this. It's seriously incredible. Bless those bears and their ingenuity. Oh and Maude I'm not kissing you until you go to a doctor. I bet you're all sorts of crudded up with disease from that bear root beer.