Dad's Old Fashioned Red Cream Soda

Dad! I knew you would find someway to ruin my 13th birthday party! I kept you in the dark about most of it, because even though I know you have the best of intentions, you always mess everything up. I had mom take care of the cake, the clown, the decorations and all of the food. Not surprisingly all of that is perfect. You had one responsibility and that was to buy pop for everyone and you somehow messed that up! I even made you a list and told you specifically where you could get it! What, you don't know many 13 year olds who know exactly what stores to buy specific sodas at? Well I'm a new breed, okay?

You completely ignored my list, and obviously went to a discount store. Don't try denying it; you left the price tags on the bottles. Not only did you go the cheap route, but you also only bought one flavor. I know you bought it because you thought it was cute that it's called Dad's and you're my dad. On top of that it's “Big Daddy Size.” I have to tell you, now that I'm a teenager that just sounds creepy and gross. Don't ever say that phrase again! So here we are with a bunch of bottles of Dad's Old Fashioned Red Cream Soda. At first I gave you the benefit of the doubt because cream soda is delicious, and I loved that can of red cream soda mom brought me back from Toronto. The thing is this stuff is garbage. It tastes like someone took 3 parts bubble gum flavored soda and mixed in 1 part cream soda. It's basically champagne cola and cream. It's gross! I hate it! You've ruined my birthday! I'm never speaking to you again!