Italian Volcano 100% Organic Blood Orange Juice

It is a little known fact that in Italy volcanoes reign supreme. Many know that such practices occur in places such as Indonesia, but for centuries the denizens of “The Boot” have kept their rituals a secret. I'm about to blow up their spot in a major way.

I'm going to go ahead and ruin everyone's fun right away; they don't perform human sacrifices. I mean they aren't savages. They aren't trying to over throw the world. They are just looking to help their crops, by appeasing to some old gods. You might find yourself asking why has it been kept such a tight-lipped secret for all this time. It's simple actually, with the Vatican basically in their back yard; you don't really want to upset the Holy See with what they would see as false worship. Basically if the church blacklists you, your tourist trade goes in the turlet.

Back to the important garbage: The main item that is sacrificed to the volcano gods is blood oranges. You know how gods are all into symbolism, well they like to pretend that the juice of the blood orange is actually human blood, like the old days. Gross. The Italians may not be savages, but the gods really wished they were. Some people just throw bushels of oranges into the fiery depths, but others believe that the gods prefer you to take the time with your sacrifice and juice it. I mean, what's more impressive: a tiny body, or a big jug of blood?

Dream Foods started pilfering from their sacrifices in order to sell the deliciousness to the public outside of the country. With a mixture of three different varieties of blood oranges with no sugar added, how can you go wrong? It tastes like a mix between a sweet orange and a grapefruit. It's glorious. Once you get a taste, you'll never want to go back to plain orange juice again. Don't let the name fool you though. This is not an Italian soda; it's not carbonated. It is straight up juice meant for a sacrifice. By drinking it you may be taking away from fields of rigatoni and penne, that would feed a nation, but hell, I think it's worth it.