Lipton Half and Half
To whom it may concern,
What are you doing over there? Do you have three separate divisions? Your drinks have completely different flavors. You've got your Joe Shmo brand garbage like Brisk and this half and half which is quite possibly, top five worst half and half's I've ever had, and your TrueLeaf and your new 100% Natural line which are pretty amazing. So what's the deal? Here's what I think.
You've got the classics, the relics, the veterans, and the original line up. These guys are the people that started Lipton. They make stuff the way it should be made; real sugar, actual, real tea, natural flavors. These guys make the TrueLeaf.
You've got the new jacks, the rookies, the kids making the 100% Natural line. It's good for you and has natural sweeteners, which don't taste like liquid sewage and actually let the natural flavors shine through. They utilize the newest technologies and natural ingredients to allow the flavors to act as they should and stay low in calories.
Then you've got the 80's guys. Those jerks. Giant lapels and even bigger hair, these know-it-alls will do anything to turn a buck. Take this half and half, for instance. It's too sweet. It is clearly made from excess or overstock Brisk. Then there is lemonade in there. You can't really taste it, but you are left with the feeling on your tongue like you just drank lemonade but can't taste it. You know they're churning this out by the gallon and those 80's dudes are just sitting on their cigarette boats, blaring Van Halen's "1984" so loud that it's veering the ship off course.
Old dudes and young guns, why do you let yuppie jerks get away with bringing your entire company down? Yes, I understand that they carry the load of the company on their padded shoulders, but don't you want to be known as a quality tea manufacturer rather than a drink powerhouse? It's money versus integrity.
I love a lot of your stuff and I don't like a lot of your stuff. You've released more than any company and you've got a lot coming out all the time. Try and turn down the poor quality stuff and turn up the classic tastes.
Sincerely,
Mike of the Thirsty Dudes
What are you doing over there? Do you have three separate divisions? Your drinks have completely different flavors. You've got your Joe Shmo brand garbage like Brisk and this half and half which is quite possibly, top five worst half and half's I've ever had, and your TrueLeaf and your new 100% Natural line which are pretty amazing. So what's the deal? Here's what I think.
You've got the classics, the relics, the veterans, and the original line up. These guys are the people that started Lipton. They make stuff the way it should be made; real sugar, actual, real tea, natural flavors. These guys make the TrueLeaf.
You've got the new jacks, the rookies, the kids making the 100% Natural line. It's good for you and has natural sweeteners, which don't taste like liquid sewage and actually let the natural flavors shine through. They utilize the newest technologies and natural ingredients to allow the flavors to act as they should and stay low in calories.
Then you've got the 80's guys. Those jerks. Giant lapels and even bigger hair, these know-it-alls will do anything to turn a buck. Take this half and half, for instance. It's too sweet. It is clearly made from excess or overstock Brisk. Then there is lemonade in there. You can't really taste it, but you are left with the feeling on your tongue like you just drank lemonade but can't taste it. You know they're churning this out by the gallon and those 80's dudes are just sitting on their cigarette boats, blaring Van Halen's "1984" so loud that it's veering the ship off course.
Old dudes and young guns, why do you let yuppie jerks get away with bringing your entire company down? Yes, I understand that they carry the load of the company on their padded shoulders, but don't you want to be known as a quality tea manufacturer rather than a drink powerhouse? It's money versus integrity.
I love a lot of your stuff and I don't like a lot of your stuff. You've released more than any company and you've got a lot coming out all the time. Try and turn down the poor quality stuff and turn up the classic tastes.
Sincerely,
Mike of the Thirsty Dudes
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- United States
- Sweetener
- High Fructose Corn Syrup
- Author
- Mike Literman on 6/4/11, 10:08 PM
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