Dr. Pepper - 6 Reviews

Jay and I are not fine food eaters. We do not tuck our napkins in our shirts when we eat. Heck, I don't even use napkins. When we go out, we just go real easy. We don't always necessarily go "safe" but we take what's there. We are not beggars nor are we choosers.

Today, our adventure to an island that did not prove to be as "great" as it claimed to be and out plans went south so we had to make other arrangements. Those arrangements? Taco Bell, Trader Joe's, and Guitar Center. When we go, we go big and get fun new varieties of Mountain Dew and I got this, a Freeze. I haven't been to Taco Bell in a while but this is a new thing that they most certainly did not invent, as it's just a Slurpee. Vanilla Dr. Pepper, though. That is something. It's not exactly my highly desired cherry chocolate Dr. Pepper but it's something. So how "something" was it? It was just something, really. Perhaps not enough vanilla. Sure a Dr. Pepper Slurpee is wonderful but I would have liked a little bit more vanilla, you know, because it's what I ordered.

We made the most after other people decided to turn their Memorial Day into a Memorial Extended Weekend. You work at a music store. Aside from people murdering Stairway every twenty-five minutes, you've got it pretty easy.

Have you ever heard the Patton Oswalt bit he does about an open mic he hosted in Toronto? Well it is relevant to this review since the guy he talks about in the bit is named Dr. Pepper. You know what, do yourself a favor and listen to/watch the bit:



Sadly this can of Diet Dr. Pepper isn't as funny as that. It's not as bad as most diet sodas, but it's also not as good as most other varieties of Dr. Pepper. At least we got to hear a funny bit from Patton Oswalt right?

Words cannot describe how excited we are that Cassandra was willing to do a review for us. She is one of the funniest and wittiest people to have graced the screen. As it turns out she is obsessed with Dublin Dr Pepper, and has been trying to round up all of the bottles that she can since it recently went out of production. If you ever come across a bottle I say you let her have it first. Now on to her review:

R.I.P. DUBLIN DR. PEPPER - (1891-2012)

I was recently shocked and saddened to learn that in January of this year, Snapple sued the Dublin Dr. Pepper Bottling Plant to stop making Dublin Dr. Pepper. They had apparently violated their contract with the company who also sell the drink, by allowing it to 'leak out' of the 44-mile radius in which the Dublin, Texas company was contractually confined to selling it.

I loved Dublin Dr. Pepper. It was my caffeine delivery system of choice and I'm extremely sensitive to caffeine so it gave me a fantastic buzz. I generally drank it only when I was working as Elvira, whether shooting my show, Movie Macabre, or simply signing autographs at Horror Conventions. It gave me energy, without the frenzied mania, shaking and sweating that a cup of regular coffee gives me. And DDP made me happy. I know it's basically only sugar, water and carbonation, but that bubbly little concoction in the adorable baby glass bottles did more for me than just give me 'Star Energy'. It actually made me funnier than I usually am. Which is pretty funny. I referred to it as 'Comedy Juice'. And because it had the abbreviated word for Doctor in it, it gave me a false sense of health and well-being.

It reminded me of my childhood. It tasted like the real real thing. And the little glass bottles were the perfect size. No yucky high-fructose corn syrup. No diabetes-inducing 20 ounces of sickeningly sweet fake flavor in a gigantic plastic bottle; no canned metallic after-taste, just 8 refreshing ounces of soda-pop euphoria. I also loved the fact that you still needed a 'church key' to open it. No stinkin' twist-off cap for Dublin Dr. Pepper.

It was fairly expensive, but still cheaper than 'crack'. I'll admit it. I was a Dublin Dr. Pepper junkie.

In fact, upon hearing the news of it's untimely demise, I bought up every bottle I could lay my hands on, over $500 worth of the stuff. I know, right? It's crazy. I don't drink alcohol to excess or do drugs or smoke. Dublin Dr. Pepper was my addiction and soon, after my stash is gone, I will be forced to go through a Snapple imposed Detox.

Goodbye Dublin Dr. Pepper. Looks like I won't be seeing you anytime soon. Not at 10:00, not at 2:00...not even at 4:00.

- Cassandra Peterson AKA Elvira, Mistress of the Dark


Here is a video of her enjoying a bottle in character:

So let me get this straight, this is an ALMOST diet Dr. Pepper? Sure I'll give it a try! Hmmm, it's much lighter than the regular variety, but doesn't have the gross taste the diet version has. I don't normally care for Dr. Pepper (or it's many brothers and sisters), but this isn't that bad. In addition to tasting lighter, it also has less of the traditional bite this classic beverage is known for.

The most interesting thing to me about this is that high fructose corn syrup is the main sweetener, but there is also aspartame in it. Since it's a little further down the list, I'm assuming there's less in there and the corn syrup helps mask its usual gross taste. Good work chemists at Dr. Pepper! I'm going to put this right with the Dublin variety, still not amazing but better than the original.

I wonder why major soft drink companies decided that cherry was the flavor they were going to add to all of their drinks. First there was Cherry Pepsi. Then there was Mountain Dew Code Red. Now Dr. Pepper Cherry. Maybe they tried making Dr. Pepper Orange and it just wasn't good.

This incarnation of cherry infused soda is alright. I like that it's colored red instead of the normal brown that Dr. Pepper is. Some sips taste like cherry soda with a hint of Dr. Pepper, and others taste the exact opposite. It goes down much smoother than normal Dr. Pepper, and doesn't have as much of the usual aftertaste. I got this can for free in downtown Portland. I'm assuming they were trying to get people to be interested in their products, but I doubt I'll ever buy this because it's not amazing.

I like Dr. Pepper. It's one of the only "standard" pops that I drink. I like the flavor.

For that reason, I liked this throwback version. It didn't have any real different taste, perhaps just a little bit sweeter. It seemed to have a different bite to it. It no longer had the thickness and lastingness of corn syrup and had a more instant and quick taste.

Please, just keep using real sugar and retire your old ways.