Freeze - 2 Reviews

My buddy Dave said it best. His review of this drink was, "You can really taste the 11% sugar." This might be some of the sweetest coffee drink I've ever had. Jay, Dave, Editor Dan, and I went to a couple stores and just hung out all day. It would have been the same day we had when we were ten years ago. A couple small markets, clothing stores, the mall, and so on. Bunch of dudes hanging out. Oh, and Chili's. We all love Chili's. We easily co-drank two gallons of unsweetened blackberry tea that day.

Anyhow, we went to a favorite Asian market and did some shopping and this was one of the drinks we got. Dave got one as well as I and he drank his in the car. We spread it all around because we're all very good friends. Everyone's sentiments were all the same. It's too darn sweet. It's got a good iced black tea taste but the quantity of sugar will inevitably put the majority of this drink down the drain, on the parking lot next to you car where you bought it, rudely on some kid's head, on your table because you accidentally knocked it over forgetting there was still so much in there, or anywhere else that isn't down your gullet.

Good morning, Ames, Iowa. We're coming to you live from this rented chopper we borrowed from the local high school. Er, I mean hospital. As you can see, traffic is moving pretty well through the highway. We had to get up mighty early to get this helicopter for you and I haven't had my coffee yet so I apologize for any mistakes that I might make on air. My cameraman, Joe, is handing me a can. Joe, what is this? This isn't coffee. It is? This is bad TV, I know, but I really need drink...what is this? It's not in English. Oh, turn it around? Oh, Freeze Extra, huh? Well, down the hatch, right, Ames?

This is great, Joe. Where did you get this? What are you doing at an Asian market? Oh, sure, buying udon. Why else would you go there? Ames, Joe here loves his udon noodles and he eats it every day at lunch. He's even got those cool, ceramic spoons and eats it out of a wooden bowl. Are you Asian, Joe? Irish? Well we seem to have gotten our wires crossed. The milk really smoothes down this coffee. It's like the coffee I get from the coffee shop but cold. I like it. Joe, Ames, Iowa, you have a wonderful day. You down there is the gorgeous new Hyundai Veloster who almost hit that semi, I know you can't hear me but be careful with that thing.

Joe, we've really got to get a helicopter for the station. This thing is great. Oh, we've been off the air for ten minutes? Who cares? It's awesome up here.