Cintron Liquid Energy Tropical Azul

If Dora the Explorer has taught me one thing, it's that "azul" means "blue". Since I took four years of Spanish, two in high school and two in college, I already knew that, so that loud brat actually taught me nothing.

This drink is certainly blue and certainly tastes tropical. Check and check. Two things that are not lies right off the bat. Good start, Cintron. Then I took a sip and there was another check; an energy drink that was not at all disgusting. It does taste "tropical" but I can't exactly pinpoint actual flavors. I'm going to say pineapple might be in there, followed by some leis and also a hula skirt and a copy of Dog the Bounty Hunter: Best of Seasons 1, 2 and 3 on DVD all liquefied into a can.

I don't drink a lot of energy drinks but I've been feeling my body crash at like six almost every day so today I felt like I needed it. If all energy drinks were this good or if this was sold by me, I would turn into one of those people that can drink them and get no boost, like those jerkwads who take so much ibuprofen that when they ask you for it and you say "How many do you want? Two?" they respond with a scoff and a number higher than five. You're a drug addict and you're also pathetic. Deal with the pain and earn your tolerance back. Stop taking medicine for everything. Pilgrims never had medicine and they turned out fine. I bet pilgrims would have loved this drink though.

I have more in the can downstairs. I hope those dogs didn't knock it off the table and are getting speed boosts.