Mountain Dew Game Fuel Tropical

Troops. I've got some bad news. No, you're not being deployed to Afghanistan again, it's worse. You know all the Muscle Milk you've been drinking? Well due to the economic climate, we can no longer provide you with an "All You Can Drink" supply, regardless if you are saving the country or not. Fortunately, our milk supply was replaced by Mountain Dew. Now, before you scoff if you don't like Mountain Dew, this is Game Fuel Mountain Dew which might contain more zip or zazz or whatever the kids are saying nowadays. It's also the tropical flavor so can feel like your deployed in California rather than here in Watertown New York.

On top of all these facts it's sponsored by Call Of Duty 3, a video game I've heard is very popular involving an army killing bad guys. What they probably don't capture in the game is the unfortunate loss of Muscle Milk. They only capture the unfortunate occurrence of shooting bad guys. There is more to war than shooting bad guys. We're fighting a war with milk and the lack of funds we need to replace that milk.

What did you say, Private? Oh, the taste. I don't know. I didn't actually have any. I've had pop before in my day, but none of it has been so...forest green. Well son, this tastes like a mix between Mountain Dew, a product I have had in my day, and fruit punch, what we drank when I was your age. It's better than the Mountain Dew I remember, son. I can tell you that.

So once again, your precious milk has been replaced with Army themed pop and you should search for your calcium elsewhere. A travesty, I know.