Spree Sparkling Water Kiwi Kumquat

Mrs. Mulvaney we are happy to announce that you have won a shopping spree. We understand that you are a 68 year old mother of four children who have left the nest to have families of your own. We also have down here that you are diabetic and that you have a passion for kitten sweaters. After compiling all of that data, we have decided to grant you a seven minute shopping spree at Home Depot. It seemed like the most fitting establishment on our list for your lifestyle. Remember to grab all of that lumber you'll need for those renovations you would like to do to your house, if you didn't live in a third floor apartment.

By our calculations your frail frame should be able to push a shopping cart that weights about 300lbs. So make sure you stock up on power tools while you have the time! By law we are required to furnish you with a beverage during your spree, as to avoid any allegations of neglect in case you die from exhaustion/dehydration. Our team of specialists has determined this bottle of kiwi kumquat sparkling water will be perfect for the job. Oh look at that, it's sweetened with stevia, so you also won't have a diabetic episode because of it. Our specialists really are on their game here.

This thing actually tastes pretty good for being diet as well. I think I might have to contact the head office and have them send me a case. It smells more like kiwi than it tastes like that magical green fruit, but it still has a nice general tropical fruit taste to it. It's rare that you come across kumquats in a drink, but I'm all for it. It's like a tiny fancy orange, with a slightly different taste. I much prefer them to the strawberry that normally accompanies kiwi. Overall it's light, it's fruity and the stevia doesn't make you feel like you're poisoning yourself just to lower your sugar intake. I mean sure it taste more like stevia than any fruit, but that is the nature of the diet game.

Now Mrs. Mulvaney, take off that house coat and grab some comfortable shoes. You're got a store to ransack.