Sunkist Ten Orange Soda

Men. We're tough. We don't cry. We wipe our noses with sandpaper. We eat rocks and we eat animals. One thing we don't do is diet. We're fine with our weight and don't have any issues with our shape. Shows like "The Biggest Loser" include "guys" but they are really just holograms. No guy is at the gym, either. Every guy you see at the gym is a woman in a man's suit.

Often we do want to go up and down the stairs without having to stop half way and catch our breath. A diet of chicken wings, hamburgers, and triple thick chocolate milkshakes do not lead to a particularly healthy lifestyle. As I said, guys don't diet, but they do cut back a little. That's where the "Ten" line comes in. Flat gray can and a marketing message do a lot. It's only one step away from black, gray is. If you spend your days chugging fruity pop and need to "cut back," you've got another choice. This would be all well and good if this didn't taste so "diet." Yeah, part of disguising a diet drink as "manly" is to keep it from tasting like a diet drink and reminding these brutes that they are, in fact, on a diet. It's got a good, classic Sunkist orange taste but is promptly washed over by a sea of artificial sweeteners. If you can take your "cutting back" with a grain of salt and have grown to expect a different taste with your diet drinks, you'll be fine, but it just makes this drink feel like a Diet Sunkist rather than some new, rebranded line of beverage.

Men, you're awesome. You're arrogant, tough, aggressive, opinionated, and use hand tools. This drink has been specially tailored for you but it feels like more of an insult than a compliment. It just tastes like a diet drink and doesn't taste tailored.