High Fructose Corn Syrup - 485 Reviews

When I was pulling this out of the cooler at a random gas station in Utah or Oregon (I forget), a lady asked me if I've ever had it before. I replied with "no" but in my head I was laughing because I get that question daily from friends. Whether it's in person, on Facebook, or over text message, friends are always asking me "Have you tried this drink? Is it good?" I almost wanted to tell her how funny her question was to me given that I scoured the cooler for this bottle (and the diet version) and that was the ONLY drink there we haven't reviewed on this site.

I labeled this as a cola because when I bought it that's what I thought it was. It wasn't until I took a sip of it did I realize that it's a Dr. Pepper clone. I suppose the name should have clued me in on that. For a Dr. Pepper clone, it's descent but I've had better. It definitely didn't make my "taste buds flip" as the tagline suggested. Maybe they would have if it was sweetened with sugar and differentiated itself from Dr. Pepper a little more.

Key Lime soda is my favorite thing to stumble upon. It's not that popular/common so it doesn't happen too often. When it does though, my face lights up (or I assume it does). I stumbled upon this bottle in a Big Lots in Salt Lake City and couldn't believe my eyes. Two of my favorite sodas, key lime and cream soda, combined!

First off, I wish this wasn't sweetened with high fructose corn syrup. It's very noticeable and makes the soda much heavier than it should be. I think this is the reason why the key lime taste isn't has strong as it could be. The cream soda part is great, and in combination with the key lime it's one of the best flavored cream soda's I've had.

Damn you HFCS for making a delicious soda not as good!

I don't know if you're aware of this, but ancient Native Americans used super sweet iced tea to help with fertility. Skateboards and roller blades were also used in the ritual. That's right hundreds of years before Dogtown was even a thought the rightful owners of this country were shredding. I know it sounds completely insane, but that's all that I can gather from the label on this bottle. The figures on here look ridiculously similar to the fertility deity Kokopelli (For some reason I think my dad has a tattoo of him. That's just weird). I don't know what Kokopelli has to do with southern style iced tea, but it must be something for this subsidiary of the Canada Dry corporation to place him in a bunch of scenarios on this bottle.

I would like to come out and say that I would expect a god to endorse a much better tea. This tastes like it should be the Brisk take on southern sweet tea aka heavily sugared water with just a hint of tea. I didn't really expect much for a 99cent plastic bottle, so I guess I'm not let down. Nothing about this packaging screams “good tea” so I doubt anyone would be duped into expecting anything grand. Maybe this is just what Kokopelli drinks when he's taking a break from getting the women pregnant. I feel sorry for him. He puts in the real work and he deserves better.

I have a severe problem. I am straight up addicted to Taco Bell. I don't eat there all that often, but that is solely because it would take me 20 minutes to drive there, and a 40 minute round trip ride is not worth 2-3 99 cent burritos. The thing is that whenever I pass by one, or even see a sign for the “restaurant” I get an undying need for craptastic fake Mexican food. I could have just eaten the biggest meal of my life and then I'll pass by one and think, “yeah I could really go for a burrito now.” It's absolutely disgusting and I wish I could break myself from it.

While I love the garbage burritos that Taco Bell serves me, there is another item on their menu that I repeatedly try and always regret. That is the Taco Bell exclusive that is Mountain Dew Baja Blast. It is by far my least favorite flavor of Mountain Dew. It's supposed to be lime, you know to accent the flavors in the burritos, but it comes off as something that should not be ingested. It has an almost chemical taste that is somehow different than that of energy drinks. If someone told me that it could also be used as coolant in a car, I would not be surprised.

I know a lot of people rave over this flavor, but I don't get it at all. It's borderline undrinkable in my book. In the future when I order my three fresco bean burritos I'll accompany them with a glass of water.

It had been a long day for Mark. His boss had made him come in an hour early and then was on him all day to get this or that done in some ridiculously small amount of time. It was nonstop chaos and he didn't even have time to take a lunch. Take it from my boy Mark, Ritz crackers from the vending machine a meal does not make. By the time he got out of work, late of course, his stomach was screaming to be filled. On the walk to his car he ordered a pizza. That's right Mark ordered a large cheese pizza and he planned on eating it all himself, in one sitting. We're not talking about those 14” or 16” pizzas they have down south. This was a real deal 18” large cheese pizza that was greasy and doughy with just a hint of flour on the bottom of the crust. When he got to the pizza joint it wasn't quite ready so he checked out the little shop next door as he needed a drink to go along with his “za” and a two-liter of 7Up did not sound appealing. When he came across this can of Colombiana he knew he was in for a treat. You see Mark was a huge supporter of Cola and he loved trying the underdogs in the “Cola Wars.” What Mark didn't know was that cola and kola were not the same thing, and it was a realization that wouldn't hit him until he was two slices deep into his dinner. He cracked open the can and took a big sip, instantly realizing that it was not the soda he expected. Where he expected a heavy harsh cola flavor he was instead met by a slightly bubble gum flavored soda. It was then that the K in the flavor made sense to him. This was not cola at all, but instead it was kola champagne a drink popular in Puerto Rico. He had read the flavor described as a vanilla banana mixture, but to him it always tasted like bubble gum, and was always overly sweet and too much to handle. Colombiana's version wasn't so flavorful and he got where people had gotten the description before. This was a version of the soda that he could actually finish an entire bottle of. It didn't compliment his pizza as much as say an RC Cola would have, but it didn't ruin his meal either. He did learn his lesson though, and would never again confuse kola for the sticky sweet brown beverage that held a grip on his heart.

We're having a real problem with the drinking water here, Admiral. I don't know if we're refilling the drums with clean water and I'm afraid that we're filling it with water from the sea. Why do I ask? Well look at this cup. Number one issue I see is that it's slightly brown. Number two issue is that there are tiny rocks in it. I thought we addressed this issue last season when those dudes got sick from drinking water from a dirty stream. Sorry, I didn't mean "dudes," sir, I meant "men." So we're here drinking this fishy water and I see that you've always got a can of something. We are all in this together with everything and I don't think that drinking water should be an exception.

What is in that can that we can't have that you can have? Admiral iced tea? With lemon?! You're smuggling in a constant stream of cans of iced tea with the money we're making from shrimping? That money is supposed to go to pay the men at the end of the season and you're buying cans of this tea when we go to land. Pallets of what? You're buying pallets of this stuff? With all due respect, sir, we're eating mashed potatoes and drinking fish water for days and you've got canned iced tea. That hardly seems fair. And steaks?! Sir. I'm afraid that this may be my last season on the ship. Office Depot is hiring. My cousin is the assistant manager and he said he could get me in the ink refilling department.

I would actually like a can, if you are offering. You know what, sir? This isn't too bad. It's lightly lemon and black tea. It doesn't taste terribly natural like something mama would make but it's not too bad. I don't think that I will buy it when we get to land, but it's light years better than the salty seawater we're drinking.

Admiral, we have been together for almost a decade and I respect you, but as I said, Office Depot is offering me a position in the fairly stagnant position of ink filler and I will probably be taking it at the end of this shrimp season. Thank you for the last ten years of your time and it has been an honor to work next to you. What's the difference between "letter" and "A4" paper? I'm going to have to study up.

Things I am not into include the newish style of music called Witch House of Witch Hop. It's basically slowed down hip-hop beats with “creepy” keyboards and vocals over them. It's similar to trip hop, which I am a fan of a handful of bands, but the vocals always make it sound like the tape is just playing at the wrong speed. A lot of it reminds me of music that would be in a David Lynch movie, but not as good. I have to say after reading my description, if I hadn't already heard it, I would instantly check it out. The Witch House band I hear about the most is Salem, which is where this drink is from, and more than likely where the style for their name from. Also like a lot of the music this soda is very smooth. It tastes like a nice smooth creamy root beer, except it's birch beer. Normally birch beer has a slight harshness to it, but that is not present at all in this bottle. It has a pretty standard birch beer flavor, but the smoothness is not normal with this flavor. I just wish the music was as good as the soda.

This juice makes me want to stay in a hotel. Why? Two words: Continental Breakfast. Number one, the Lincoln Continental was a large boat of a car. The Continental Breakfast can range from cruddy doughnuts and a carton of orange juice to a smorgasbord of early morning delicacies including but not limited to:

• Pastries


• Bagels


• Breakfast Sandwiches


• Cereal

Another thing they have is juice. Sometimes they really raise the bar and have multiple types of juice like orange, pineapple, cranberry, and grape. This drink tastes like you are on a business trip to finally close the Johnson deal and you woke up, thirsty as ever. You go downstairs and they've got a sweet setup but they're running late on juice so you've got to mix. You pull a fifty-fifty with some pineapple and orange knowing it will be good and it is. You can taste the two mingling as if they're shaking hands closing deals with your taste buds. If they can do it, you can, too.

You go to your meeting, promptly impress the client, land the Johnson deal, get a big bonus and the admiration of your co-workers, and go buy yourself a nice new suit because you earned it all thanks to two juices that came together to satisfy your palate.

With all of these half and halfs popping up lately you would expect the companies to pay more attention to their mixture in order to make their product stand out. Fuze apparently didn't think that was very important. When I drink a beverage such as this I want a strong tea as well as a strong lemonade flavor. All this delivers is a mediocre tea flavor that would fit in well amongst the generic gas station crowd and a lemon flavor that is just slightly stronger than your everyday lemon tea. It's average in every way. At least they didn't put milk in it like they do a lot of their drinks.

Those of you who know me may know of my affinity for the state of Virginia. Since 2001 my bands have played there fairly regularly, and I've developed quite a few friendships. In 2003 when a band broke up in Richmond I simply stayed behind. I spent three months or so between Warrenton and Richmond and it was wonderful. To this day I still try to make it down to Richmond to visit at least once a year. It's one of two cities that I would ever leave Buffalo to live in (Toronto is the other).

With so much love for the state how have I never tried Northern Neck until today? The can claims that it has been a Virginia tradition since 1926. Apparently my friends are not ones for tradition. This may be the single best ginger ale I have ever had, even though it's sweetened with HFCS. Due to the sweetener and the fact that it is owned by the Coca-Cola company I expected this to be just another generic ginger ale. Sometimes being wrong feels so right. To sum up the flavor I would say that it tastes like a ginger beer without the burn. I love the burn, but I know a lot of other people do not, and sometimes I just want the flavor. Now I have a soda that will appeal to those with weak taste buds and those not looking for an adventure at the moment. Most modern day ginger ales do not even taste like real ginger, let alone have any in them. This has ginger in it and you can taste the difference. It's so damn flavorful that I'm kicking myself that I only bought one can on my most recent visit to the capital of the Confederacy. Next time I will not make the same mistake.

I used to be in a band. I've mentioned it before and I'll mention it again. I don't give a rip. One day, we as a band dug out my drummer Josh Myers' (see where I'm going here?) basement. "Dug out?" you say? Yes. He lived in an old house in the outskirts of the suburbs and had a section of the basement that had a dirt floor. He dad needed some help so we dug down about a foot or two in about a 150 to 200 square foot space. That's a lot of dirt.

We dug and dug and filled up wheelbarrows and dumped it in an unused well outside. I don't remember how we got it up the stairs, or if there were stairs, or if we made a ramp but all I know is that I took my shirt off because it didn't matter where else dirt got because we were covered. All of us. We did a great job and I can't imagine the amount of money that we saved Josh's daddy. We all felt accomplished and were thanked by a fantastic pizza; the food of movers and grunt workers.

Back then there was no Thirsty Dudes so back then we were all idiots drinking no-name cola but now...now I know better. If I could do it again, I would bring a cold six-pack of this stuff. Nothing is manlier than root beer and four dudes digging dirt like some sort of criminal or misbehaving dog or human backhoe deserves great stuff. This root beer is strong and contains a special ingredient that changes the entire way that this drink tastes. Cinnamon. I've wanted a nice root beer with cinnamon for a while. I don't know why, but I have and this drink doesn't let me down.

Now I can't go back in time to quench the thirst of us, but I can meet up with some of the guys and give them a bottle and have them mentally go back and reminisce about "the old days" and how much better it would have been with this root beer. Good time, good tunes, and good root beer: the equation for a good time.

You know how when bees make honey it can taste a little like the flowers they got the pollen from? Well I'd like to get some honey from bees that were feasting on guava blooms. I got the idea from the hummingbird on this can. Yeah that's right, I went from hummingbird to bees in less than a second. My brain works in mysterious ways. But yeah, guava honey would probably rate right up there with rainbows, puppies and your kiss as the best things in life (the producer made them cut it down to just your kiss).

Unfortunately this Kern's guava nectar is not on that list. It's good, but the HFCS makes it a bit too sweet and a bit too thick, in an unnatural way. It just masks the glorious taste of the guava a bit too much. Oh well I'll take what I can get when it comes to this fruit. Now someone send me that honey.

This bottle tells the tale of how in the 20's police raided Capone's warehouses 137 times looking for illegal alcohol, and all they found was soda. That is hysterical. I just imagine the workers of the warehouse pretending to be all scared and then laughing uncontrollably as police opened up crates filled with soda. I'd also like to believe that there was an illegal “hooch” ring going on as well, but it was just so well hidden that the cops couldn't find it. Dumb cops.

Even though I don't drink alcohol I'm pretty sure I would have been involved in the bootlegging side of life back then. It just seems fun and exciting. Also, have you ever seen speak easy's portrayed in movies? They look like a complete blast. Since I'm no narc I would just hang out while everyone got trashed on bootleg liquor. I would join in the party sipping on bottles of “secret soda.” I would have no problem drinking bottle after bottle of this ginger beer. It has a nice sweet ginger ale flavor that is quickly overpowered by a decent burn. It's not enough to make me pause after every sip to calm myself, but it's enough that I think it might bother your average person. It lingers a little, and that's the way I like it. I've realized that unlike every other soda on the face of the planet ginger beer tastes better when it's sweetened with HFCS. Strange times.

I say bring back prohibition, because I'm getting a little bored with things lately and I could use a little boost in excitement.

Everyone knows about the Salem Witch Trials. Women were put through horrible ordeals to see if they were witches or not. The sad thing was most of the time the only way they could tell if someone was a witch was if they survived the ordeal. Oops, over a hundred women were tried and executed via drowning, burning and getting crushed with stones. When a tragedy occurs in most towns, the townsfolk usually try to forget about it, and keep things quiet. Salem decided to take things the other way and they have turned the whole ordeal into a money making machine. There are tours, museums, and souvenirs galore. The Salem Wax Museum even sells a variety of their own sodas as well as this iced tea. I do find it a bit odd that the label has a stereotypical Halloween witch on it, instead of a normal looking townsperson like the people who were tried. That's a little insensitive, but of well. It's a decent lemon iced tea. It's pretty sweet, but in the good way. The lemon flavor also wasn't too over powering. I was shocked to see that it was sweetened with HFCS and not cane sugar, as it wasn't very thick. I enjoyed this a great deal and if I'm ever back in that area of Massachusetts I'll make sure to pick up some more.

We've been told for years to “snap into a Slim Jim” (RIP Randal Savage), but now we're being told to rip into some energy fuel. I say no thank you. Sure this tastes like generic liquid fruit punch sugar candy, but as strange as it is, that is not something that I really want. If this were the first energy drink I ever tried I would think that something was wrong with the can. Since I am used to the flavor I can get past that weirdness, but it's just not that good quality wise. I guess that's why I found it at Big Lots, with hundreds more just like it.

Twenty years old. Twenty. Arizona is one year away from being able to drink its own alcohol line. It can vote for your local quarterback as the president of the United States. It can go to the casino and win six dollars playing penny slots. It cannot rent a car without having some sort of authorization from his or her daddy. It can buy cigarettes but it's is also smart enough to know that is not a wonderful decision.

Arizona is almost a full-fledged adult and what better way to celebrate than with a drink fit for a youth? That's right, and cherry lime Rickey. I feel like this is the sibling or close cousin to the Shirley Temple. It's a little bit of cherry with a little bit of lime and a lot of bit of sparkling because that's what you do when you are twenty; you sparkle. You shine your shoes, you walk out the door, and you feel like a million bucks. You've got your ability to perform as an almost adult but while having a drink in your hand that makes you feel young.

This is a limited edition flavor with a timeless taste. Having never been to Brooklyn, I don't have the nostalgia behind this flavor but that doesn't mean that I cannot appreciate it. What am I? An ignoramus? I am not, sir, and I take insult to hear that from the likes of you. Insulting me after all the nice things I said about you. It makes you look like a real turd, you know that?

I met one person that doesn't like chocolate. Well here's the deal. She said she didn't like chocolate but had a sort of asterisk next to everything. "I don't like chocolate but I like chocolate chip cookies." or "I don't like chocolate but I like dark chocolate." Face it, girl. You like it. Just accept it and move on. She doesn't really eat a lot of food, so I don't think she'd like this drink. It's not as terrible as you would think that a chocolate fudge pop would be, though so if you are weight conscience, you could easily take a sip or two. If you feel guilty, give yourself a Weight Watchers point or something.

It's true. I haven't had a lot of chocolate pop and the ones I've had have been alright. This one is one of the best but let it be known, it's thick, man. It's a dark cola and it does taste a lot like chocolate fudge. Just saying "chocolate fudge" makes me think that I'm just drinking pounds, like I would weigh 150 pounds, take a sip with my eyes closed, and then when I opened my eyes and put the bottle down I'm all of a sudden 160 and my pants don't fit anymore. It's not the case, but "chocolate fudge soda" just sounds revoltingly terrible for you.

I'm going to put this in the "score" category because it's actually pretty good and everyone I've had try it really likes it. Diet or no diet, chocoholic or choco-hater, you'll have a good time drinking this with friends.

I have a housemate from Rhode Island who introduced me to Coffee Milk. I had never heard of Coffee Milk before, nor did I know it was the official state drink of Rhode Island. I didn't even know state's had official drinks. After reviewing this list, apparently most states really like milk.

Anyways, Coffee Milk is made by adding a little of this coffee syrup (which is basically high fructose corn syrup and coffee extract) to a glass of milk (or in my case, I added it to soy milk) and mixing it up like you would using chocolate syrup to make chocolate milk. The end result looks like coffee that has a good amount of cream/milk in it. More importantly, it is delicious! I had my doubts at first, but I now wish I lived in Rhode Island where this is the official state drink. It tastes like a coffee milkshake, which now makes me want to make a coffee milkshake with this syrup.

I need to order a couple of bottles of this soon. I can already see myself getting really addicted to this stuff.

Okay, does this company have anything to do with the hip hop artist Pit bull? There is nothing about him on the can, or the website (that I saw), but the web address is www.hiphopbev.com. That makes me think that he is behind it, but I don't think he is. Come on Pit bull take a break from thinking about how you performed on the Super Bowl halftime show, and get at me with some answers to these questions. Okay, technically it's only one question.

This drink was surprisingly tasty. In a sea of energy drinks that all taste fairly similar, this one stuck out to me. It has a strong fruit juice flavor, albeit a little candied. It's very sweet, but not disgustingly so. Actually now that I think about it the flavor reminds me of blue Pixie Sticks if they tasted more like actual fruit. Maybe its flavor really isn't that far off from its competitors.

The can says, "Guaranteed no aftertaste." Apparently Pit Bull's word isn't worth very much because there is definitely an aftertaste to this drink. It's mild, fruity and sweet, but it still is an aftertaste. Do I get the fifty cents I paid for this drink back because of that botched guarantee? Apparently their word isn't worth much, as it has a fruity sweet aftertaste, albeit mild. Not too bad on the energy drink taste. Tastes like a blue pixie stick if it tasted closer to the real fruits

I love stumbling upon regional "cheap" iced tea lines. I'm not talking about the low class giant jugs, but the kind that comes in little bottles or in cans. I came upon this little guy in a gas station in central Pennsylvania. At first it reminded me of a cheap version of the citrus Sweet Leaf. It was just a little less on the Ecto Cooler side of things. The more I drank the more it reminded me of a really cheap version of that same drink. The citrus lost it's charm and just started to taste generic and well...just there. It's also one of those drinks that uses HFCS, but cuts it with stevia to keep the sugar low. I always find that odd. If you're going to use stevia, why not also use cane sugar? Why only make half the effort? I enjoyed it and for $.89 you can't go wrong. After that first sip I just thought it might have been a nice substitute for the elusive Sweet Leaf.

Oh, I had left some in the can, and when I went to finish it about an hour later into my drive it was warm and absolutely disgusting. Make sure you drink this nice and cold.