Mike Literman - 1759 Reviews

Normally, we take a picture of the can here at Thirsty Dudes. We have kind of a rule that you take a picture of the bottle full but I guess it doesn't matter if it's in a can. Either way the color of this pop had to be shown. I mean, come on. It looks like carbonated Ecto Cooler. It looks like poison. The taste and the smell? Spot on like banana Runts. You know, those little banana shaped candies you get out of vending machines in bowling alleys.

Now I am not too keen on bananas. Sorry America, but I'm not. This is more of a candied banana than a real fruit banana. See how I keep talking about bananas and haven't once mentioned pineapples or oranges? That's because I didn't get as much as a hint of either one of those guys in this drink. Pineapple is typically a superstar in drinks. It's so acidic that it can't help it. This on is entirely banana.

Also, it should be noted, that this can in its entirety has 190 calories which is 70 more than most 12 ounce cans so I will not be drinking this whole thing and since no one is here to share it with me, half will go in the turlet sans flush so someone has to ask themselves, "What the heck happened in here?"

It's got a bite, a really hard bite. And it feels good. Man, so good. Go to a root beer brewery and get birch beer and that is the only time you will get birch beer this good. This gets an undeniable 5 apples, cherries, starts, thumbs up, bottles, or whatever else your rating system goes up to. Boylan's, you do it right.

My friend Mike said that this is the best ginger ale he's ever had. I'll lead off with this. There certainly is a lot of ginger in this lil' bottle. There are some ginger ales that are pretty sweet and some ginger ales that aren't. This is right in the middle. It actually takes you for a loop. You think that it's super sweet, but then you realize that it's all ginger, doing her job. It's sweet, but there might be more ginger than any other ginger ale I've ever had. If you believe that ginger ale will cure your aches and pains, this would be the one to be papa doctor.

Bigelow, the company that has been making tea in bags is now making iced tea and it's good. Very true to it's flavor. I will admit that I do not like ginger too much. I think that it tastes like an old woman. Remember violet candy and gum? I might sound like a hypocrite, but I liked the gum a lot, but that reminded me of chewing on an old woman. Come on...someone agree with me here. Violet gum tastes like chewing on an old woman. Man...alright...

So this tea is lemon and ginger. Both flavors are very apparent and they make a wonderful match. It's great. You initially get the ginger and then it's followed up by lemon-town USA.

Something I didn't know is that this tea, as is their other one that I will review shortly, is (at least) bottled by Arizona. I don't know if Arizona bought Bigelow or Bigelow is just renting their space temporarily when they need to bottle iced tea but who cares. They're doing good things in that plant. Keep up the good work Arizona/Bigelow team.

I was scared to try this drink. I was in fear that taking a sip would feel like someone is stabbing my cheeks with sharp spears like that scene in Ace Venture 2 when Jim Carrey had those spears in both his legs. Great scene. Great drink. It's sweetened with apple juice so there are no additional sweeteners. The cherry is the definite showman in this drink. It's tart, but deliciously tart, like a real cherry.

No lies, just juice.

You know what's hard to rate? Apple juice. I think what makes a good apple juice is it's lack of ingredients. This is just apples and some preservatives since the juice would probably go bad without it. This is not from an apple orchard on the side of the road. This is a company. It's implied that they would have some sort of preservatives.

It's very good, too. Crisp and has a real good apple flavor. I really like apple juice. It makes me feel like a kid, but who said apple juice is just for kids. Adults need apples, too. What, you think that once you get out of elementary school you're done with apples? If so, you should have stayed in K-3 a little longer because you're wrong.

Another good one, and this one's spiced. What's the difference, you ask? Spiced apple cider has nutmeg, cinnamon, and other "fall" flavors. It's good and often bites hard. There is a fine line between good and bad, but this one is good. Also, it should be known, that I got this at a discount/cheaper grocery store for the record-breaking price of only $2. That's a big deal since you can easily get upwards of $3.50 for the same size for apple cider, something to take note of.

This is good and it's just apples and spices. It's actually good for you believe it or not. It's just an apple. Drink it. Oh, on a diet? Shut up and drink it. As I said, apple cider only lasts for a few months out of the year so get it now before it's too late, too expensive, gross.

Splenda kills me. I can't deal with the taste of it and I might rather die of dehydration by the ultra-super-sweetness of it.

That aside, I will analyze this drink without that bit as many people are looking for a diet version of this classic beverage.

It's pretty good. It's got a nice, sour bite from the lemonade and the tea smooths it out. I would probably recommend this over an Arizona Arnold Palmer Lite because the aspartame in that is stronger than the Splenda is this so if you're going to be dieting and drinking a half and half, you might want more flavor and less fake sugar.

I am rating this as a diet drink, not as something that I would drink regularly. If you don't like all the sugars because you diet or just don't like sugars because you're 100 years old, I would drink this if I were you.

Sweet Tea, for anyone who doesn't know, is a Southern delicacy. When you go down there and get it, it's wonderful. It's also pretty consistent, which counts more than you will ever know. The problem in today's drink world is that every company has their own sweet tea and none of them taste the same. I get excited every time when I see a new "Sweet Tea" because I hope that it will be true to the Southern treat.

This is not. I often get confused when companies make "staple" drinks. Do they do research? Living in Buffalo, I am filled to the brim with good "Buffalo wings". Go anywhere else and the "Buffalo Wings" are absolutely disgusting. How is this possible? There are like three ingredients. If you have those three ingredients, you can't make a bad batch, same with sweet tea, black tea and sugar. Done.

I do appreciate the folks at Chadwick Bay "enhancing" my beverages with vitamins and minerals but it could be taking away from the genuine flavor of the sweet tea. Listen up, though, this is not a bad tea by any means, it's just not a traditional, classic sweet tea.

Maybe I'm looking into the word "Sweet Tea" too deeply. Maybe I'm thinking that it has to be LIKE Southern Sweet Tea all the time and not just sweetened tea. Chadwick Bay, I would give you more lenience towards this drink if you erased the subtitle "Southern Style" from your label and just called it "Sweet Tea".

I will review this drink simply by copying the conversation with the most adorable ~3 year old girl I know:

Me: Do you want to try this? You might not like it.
Her: What is it?
Me: It's like a yogurt drink with Indian spices in it.
Her: Is it orange juice?
Me: No. Do you still want to try it?
Her: Yes, I'll try it. {sips}.
Me: Do you like it?
Her: No. What is it? It's not orange juice.
Me: It's a strange drink with turmeric in it, which is a spice they put in Indian food.
Her: Why is there Indian food in that drink?

What to say...where to start...alright.

I've been looking for an anise flavored drink for a while. Pop, juice, water, it didn't matter. I never see it and I want it. I put the feelers out and almost instantly I get the feedback that right in my backyard (if my backyard was 5 city blocks) there is a guy who sells anise flavored yogurt drink. Awesome, right? Well here's where it gets fishy.

I go, “Dude's awesome!” He's got cherry and anise and turmeric, all weird stuff. I buy two, one being the anise. It's settled. After all, it's primarily yogurt whey and yogurt solids so it's bound to be good. I see the red on the bottom so it's as if he's powderized anise and put it in this drink.

I uncap it and take a sip and it's alarming. Yes, I get anise, but there is a follow up taste of just soured milk. I know that it's the unpasteurized yogurt but it's got a certain sting that makes me feel like I've done something wrong, like drink soured milk.

I really wanted to like this and I give this guy all the credit in the world for putting this product out as well as very good yogurt. All locally done. This drink is simply not for me but many of my friends like it. I feel like it's either you do or your don't. I don't.

Everyone who brought your hemp necklaces, hemp bracelets, and copies of Legalize It can leave. You, in the back using your dreads as a pillow, go home. This tea is for the Everyman man.

This tea is delicious. I don't care for peaches. So sue me. I never did. The passionfruit, on the other hand, is quite prominent. You get a nice, subtle bite from the cane sugar, which I am a fan of. I haven't felt any of the effects of the valerian root or melatonin, but maybe I was already a bit sleepy from a large dinner.

This is a legit tea as far as tea goes. Don't think of it as a hippy drink because it's too fantastic to be typecast. Now Ben Stiller...you can typecast him all the darn time.

Jay, buddy. Take a load off, why don't'cha. You always review Smoothies so I'll take the wheel on this one.

In this car that I am now driving I will review this smoothie. I think that this smoothie is good. There is carrot in it and you can taste it. It they tried to hide it, you can't hide for long, my orange friend. The scent of it is very good, very fruity. The taste of it was...different. I'm not used to the consistency of smoothies. Think of a fruit punch with the texture of tomato soup.

There is no sugar added, which is a plus and it keeps the calories down. One might say it's good for you.

I've got to pull over. Jay has to use the turlet.

At my house growing up, we were never allowed to finish the orange juice. My dad never said a single thing, but my mom instilled the fear into us that he would do something if we ever finished it. "Don't finish the orange juice on your father." mom would say. Daily. She would say it so often that I still think it when I buy orange juice for my own house.

This drink does not taste like orange juice, but it does taste like the following made up scenario that I am going to make up right now for you, for free.

I come home from school. I'm thirsty. I drink all but a small bit of orange juice. I then quickly realize that I have drunk too much and that there is an insufficient amount for even the teeniest of glasses. I look around in the fridge. Bingo. Orange drink. You know the stuff. 0% juice. 100% gross. I hear the garage door open. Dad. Crud. I pry the cap off the orange drink and pour a generous amount into the orange juice container. It's orange and after all, orange is orange, right? Pops will never know.

Fast-forward to today and if I poured that glass of "orange juice" this is what it would taste like. Also, add some nata de coco and you're spot on.

This is a tough one. I've got a generous glass and I'm torn. It has a very strong mint taste. It's very cool both to your nose and your tongue. Don't think of it as "apple mint" juice; think of it as apple juice infused with mint. It's a pretty artificial mint taste but they say that it's natural mint. It's a strange peppermint if it's peppermint at all. It's not spearmint. I can tell you that for darn sure. If you slam it, it's a strange apple juice, but if you mull over it, you get the mint before and after. I like the tart apple-ness in the middle to break it up. I'd say give it a try. It comes in a resealable carton, which is convenient.

I found this in the Polish section of a grocery store, so if you're jonesing to try it, check there first.

Quite a departure from the flavor country that is grape Aloevine, but it's nice. It's not too strong and you don't get the bitterness that is often associated with pomegranate drinks. Plus, I mean come on, the chunks.

This is a light flavor, like a well-made juice with aloe in it. Like if you went to the store, bought mix, which was in concentrate form, not powder, and then ground up an aloe plant and put the shavings in your drink.

If you haven't had any aloe vera drinks up to now, this is a good, safe place to start. Nothing is overpowering. If you love it, you have the ability to buy the 1.5 liter bottles of it. Thanks Aloevine!

You, over there, you bring balloons. You with the hat on, you bring streamers. You two are in charge of the cake and you over there with the ugly face, bring pizza. None of that thick stuff, either. The thinner the better. Oh, me? I'll bring the pop. No Jimmy, I won't get diet pop. What, do I want to kill my friends? No, it will be grape. Yeah, dude, grape pop. It's a party isn't it? What other time would you drink grape pop? Parties are grape pop's only outlets.

This, so far, is my least favorite pop from Monroe. It's got a good initial "candy" grape taste, but kind of quickly gets a bit medicinal. It's thick, too. It also feels syrup-y. I know that's not a word and I don't care. What, am I going to use the word "viscous"? Not in this review, buddy. Lowest common denominator.

First of all, look at the large image of this. The flavor tells it all. Basil seeds. This didn't taste like what you would think and all I can use to describe it is if you took a banana Laffy Taffy and rolled it around in birdseed for texture. You know what I hate? Banana Laffy Taffy. If anyone has a good gag reflex and loved banana Laffy Taffy, this could potentially be the drink for you. Otherwise I might advise you stay clear.

This trip to the Asian market is slowly ending up in a bust. I've got to go back, but I might be less adventurous next time.

Living in the North East part of these United States, I am familiar with "apple season." It's called "autumn" or "fall" for people outside of these here parts. Let me tell you how it goes, because it's important.

Typically families buy large plots of land and hand it down from generation to generation. They grow rows and rows and acres and acres of nothing but apple and sometimes pumpkins. They make their money by selling apples to local markets and by selling the worlds best cider, apple juice, donuts, and anything else you can make with apples. I'm telling you, you've never had a donut until you have a fresh apple cinnamon apple from an apple orchard. There's nothing like it in the world.

With farms like these, they make gigantic batches of apple cider throughout the season and they make it with different apples and sometimes they throw other fruits in there to create a line of beverages.

This cider is like a dream. It's some of the best cider I've had, but it's on par with other local ciders. It tastes like if you just crushed up apples and sold the juice and that's all it is. No preservatives, no sugar, no treatment. Get it while it's hot, get it while it's fresh, get it for a limited time. I won't even drink cider between the months of December and July since it's probably somehow treated, sweetened, and grossified.

Take a trip to New York some time and get a gallon of apple cider. You'll never think the same way about apples and apple juice will forever be the second best when it comes to apple flavored beverages.

Another fantastic Thai tea. I love it. This jam clocks in at nearly 200 calories per can, so share with a friend unless you're trying to bulk up, but fitness aside, man, so good. It's very creamy and not at all light on flavor. One thing I see in this tea that I don't see in other Thai teas is little flakes. I don't know what they are, but they look like fish food. I'll drink it. I don't care. If it tasted like this and they were real fish food, I'd still drink it. I have to build up an immunity to it sometime, right? What if I'm trapped in a dungeon and all I have is water and fish food? I'll eat it. It's just fish anyhow. Yeah, fish food is made from fish. Fish are cannibals. Deal with it.