Sucralose - 291 Reviews

Folks, let's just face the facts. The chances of anyone out there actually making a watermelon flavored drink that tastes like watermelons are slim to none. Most things that are supposed to be watermelon end up tasting like Jolly Ranchers. They only get the credit because there zero amount of research I will claim them as the first company to try and harness the essence of watermelon. It's not a bad flavor, but it certainly tastes absolutely nothing like the fruit. There is so much water in watermelon that it would probably take 50 full grown melons to get enough essence juice to make an 8oz beverage. It's just not cost effective, especially since I don't think there are any real health benefits to that specific fruit. Rant over.

While this doesn't actually taste like watermelon, it does have a decent blueberry flavor to it. It's also the strongest tasting Cascade Ice that I have tried. Sure it's sweetened with sucralose and is essentially flavored seltzer water (a losing combination in my book) it is still remotely enjoyable for me. I keep thinking “I'm really not into this,” but as soon as the flavor leaves my mouth I find myself taking another sip. I can only assume that those of you out there who are into diet drinks, and who are not grossed out by the taste of sucralose, would really enjoy this. With zero calories you could drink an entire case of this and not feel terrible about yourself, well except for the fact that you peed your pants.

Ice is everywhere. It is nice to chill your drinks, keep your food from spoiling and even preserving cavemen in ice until they can be unfrozen in California and turn out to be a way cool dude. The problem with ice is that it's not very portable. It requires large, bulky equipment to move it anywhere without it melting. Sure there is the dry ice option, but the number of people who just burn the hell out of themselves with it is astronomical. Scientists have been hard at work in the labs trying to invent “liquid ice.” If their plans come to fruition it would be less bulky and easier to cart around your frozen Neanderthals. Sure people mocked them saying that liquid ice is nothing but cold water, but that didn't stop them. They kept trucking on in their research. Many experiments were performed, but unfortunately they did not achieve their goal. Instead they invented an energy drink. You would think with all the chemicals they would use anything that was created should not be ingested, but these scientists thought outside of the box and tried non-toxic materials. Since their real research seemed to be going nowhere they ditched the actual liquid ice idea, kept the name and started marketing it. They ended up with a diet energy drink that had sucralose in it. It really just tasted like liquid Spree candy, if that candy was made from compressed sucralose instead of compressed sugar. It wasn't mind blowing, but they thought that since no other energy drink company had yet to call dibs on the Spree flavor that might as well. That is the story. I heard it from my cousin's nephew's third grade teacher, and she would never lie. Liars have to stand in the corner.

All I can think of since I picked up this can today is that stupid Metallica song “Fuel.” The terrible tribal flames on the can don't do much to help either. There is a broken record in my head, and all I hear is “Give me fuel. Give me fire. Give me that which I desire.” Infinite loop. I don't even know if I've ever even listened to the entire song. Do you remember back in the 80's when bands like Metallica and Slayer seemed like the evilest things ever? I remember the kid down the street from me stole a Slayer tape from his brother and I was scared to listen to it. We finally did and I thought it was the fastest music I had ever heard. I also thought that it was pretty awesome. That same kid and I also got in trouble that year in school because we were reading a Sandman comic that had the devil in it (he didn't even look like a demon, just a dude). The fact of the matter is that both those bands were decent back then, but now I have friends that are in bands that play way faster and are way more evil. It's strange how our perceptions change.

I can tell you two perceptions of mine that I don't think will ever change. First off newer Metallica is garbage and it feels like the band is playing a joke on people. Secondly this is not a very good energy drink. It just tastes like carbonated diet sugar water with the faintest hint of fruit punch. There isn't even a fake candy taste to it. It's just total sucralose. I'm a guy who prefers diet Red Bull to the regular version, and I just can't get down with this. It does its job of getting you energized, but there are hoards of other diet energy drinks out there that do the same while tasting better. Leave this one to gather dust in discount stores.

Can someone please tell me when the energy drink consortium signed an exclusive deal with the Wonka corporation for all energy drinks to taste like someone shot candy with a laser to make it a liquid. One would think it would be a normal flavor, but it is one that is exclusively used in sugar-based candies and in energy drink. It's the strangest thing. Even though this is a sugar free drink it still tastes like candy. How can something with no sugar taste exactly like something that is composed entirely of sugar? That is the “shock” in Shock Wave. It's a shock that this can taste so sweet and candylike, but be sugar free.

Oh and yes, this tastes like a variant of 95% of all energy drinks out there. It tastes slightly diet, but mostly like candy. Sweet, sweet candy.

The bees have started revolting. The world is upset because "bees are going extinct" but in reality, the bees are fine, they're just mad. They're mad because companies have been making "pretty close" honey in powder form rendering the hard working bees of the past obsolete. Bees. They are annoying when you're allergic but they're fine. It's the typical, "don't bother them and they won't bother you" mantra. It's what the kid bee's parents say to them, too.

So man comes along and creates natural things unnaturally and sells them back to people who know and love the natural version of the unnatural thing. Makes sense...These super scientists have created a green tea with lemon and honey that isn't terrible for you, sweetened artificially, and made from powder that isn't absolutely revolting. I know, I know. "Absolutely revolting" isn't a hard level to surpass, but it's been done. It's not too sweet and actually tastes like you want it to all the while being 20 calories. What more could you ask for? Oh, I don't know. A tea made with real honey, lemons, and green tea. Beggars can't be choosers. Remember that mantra while you're categorizing the other one I reminded you of.

Sometimes you have a long day at work and when you get home you just want to sit back relax with your ladyfriend and your cats and watch a movie. Sometimes you still feel stressed, so you drink a relaxation drink to help mellow you out. Sometimes that relaxation drink is a can of the sugar free version of Koma Unwind. Always that drink will taste like the strangeness that would be diet Pixie Stix. Instead of tasting like flavored ground down sugar it now tastes like flavored ground down sucralose. It's somehow not completely terrible. I don't like it as much as the normal, but for those of you out there who are accustomed to diet drinks this would probably taste pretty darn awesome.

Sometimes about a half hour after drinking this drink your still conscious, but your body feels like it is asleep. Sometimes it's a strange sensation and it makes you feel restless, because you're not in bed and asleep. Sometimes you give in and go to bed. Sometimes you have dreams that you're a criminal breaking into a broken down Dave Foley's house to break into a safe. Sometimes he comes home and you sneak out the back into a neighborhood park. Sometimes he comes out and you chat each other up. Sometimes you ask if you can use his bathroom so you can go back in and recover the jacket you left behind. Sometimes Dave Foley has a completely disgusting toilet. Sometimes the next thing you know a truck with a gallows on it is pulling up for your execution. Sometimes you make it so the truck rolls down the hill into the lake in order to not die. Then sometimes for some inexplicable reason you dream about drawing highly lifelike pictures of Hugh Laurie.

Sometimes life is very strange with Koma.

These drinks are the beverage worlds equivalent of Tribbles. Don't act like you don't know what a Tribble is. I know you're secretly a nerd and have at least a beginner's knowledge of Star Trek, so you can just stop pretending that you are clueless as to what I'm talking about. Again, this drink=Tribbles. No matter how many I drink of them whenever I open my fridge/cupboard there are more waiting for me. I think they may actually be asexual organisms that are just reproducing. If they were spectacular drinks I would celebrate this and encourage them to reproduce at high volumes. Truth be told, I'm not a fan of diet drinks, or things that taste like seltzer water. I don't flat out hate them, but with so many other drinks floating around my world I'm drinking these out of a sense of duty. In reality these aren't bad at all, but they are completely middle of the road. This one in particular tastes like a slightly dry diet orange soda with just a hint of mango. You really can't even make out that it's mango, but there is definitely another fruit flavor there other than orange. To be completely honest I would have probably enjoyed this a bunch more if they had completely forgone a sweetener instead of using sucralose. Oh well, I'm sure that when I go to move more drinks to my fridge tomorrow I'll find 8 more bottles of this stuff. KKKKKHHHHHHHHHHAAAAAAAANNNNNN!!!!!!!!

Full disclosure: I am sick. It's been over a year since I've been sick so it's not that upsetting. I have a horrible cough and my nose is like a faucet. I woke up today feeling slightly better so I thought I'd come to the coffee shop to get some work done. I didn't think drinking coffee while being sick was the best idea, so for some stupid reason I thought an energy drink would be better.

In the past I have hated every Rockstar energy drink I've tried. Maybe it's because my nose is so stuffed that I can't smell a thing and it's throwing my taste buds off, but I actually don't mind this one. It has a less sweet Red Bull/melted candy taste. I'm not sure if this is the best thing for my body right now, but it definitely woke me up enough to realize that I'm still too sick to work.

Not all mad scientists are actually "mad." They're usually just very focused and headstrong and insistent that what they are doing is for the greater good. It's not crazy to be passionate about your work. It's admirable. Christopher Lloyd, not the actor, was a mad scientist. He knew it was his calling long before Back to the Future came out. After that movie, people started picking on him because of the name, profession, and messy white hair. He knew he was up to something good, though.

Christopher loved lemonade and fruit but was always concerned about his weight. He didn't have a weight problem. He was just always concerned. He would sit in his basement laboratory day after day and mix ingredients into beakers and pour them back and forth. It's just something scientists do. One day, Christopher was close. He mixed in lemons and strawberries that he had poured liquid nitrogen on and powderized into water. The taste was alright but needed something. He poured some artificial sugar packets that he uses in his coffee in the mix. It was better but needed one more thing. He carbonated the water and tried it. Success. It was great. His experiment was complete. He could check "good tasting diet fruity lemonade" off the list.

Christopher Lloyd was never to be known as that guy that looks like the actor Christopher Lloyd, but as a guy who looks like Christopher Lloyd who invented decent diet fruity lemonade.

I am lucky. I have a good metabolism. I am not bragging. I don't eat like garbage, but I don't eat terribly well. I don't do diets. I have gone on stuff like a "no pizza for a month" diet. I don't put extra cheese on things. I don't do sour cream. I'm responsible. With all of that being said, I don't need to drink diet drinks. What that does for me is gives me a perspective of not being used to that "diet" taste. I don't have to give anyone credit because it's all that I have. When I review a diet drink and say, quite repetitiously "it has that diet taste" that doesn't mean that it's bad, that just means that people who don't drink diet drinks know what to expect and people that do drink diet drinks are already expecting it.

This drink has that diet taste, but the tea taste and the mangosteen are pretty good. It's a decent blend. If you're going to be a whiner, awesome. Enjoy being a jerk and hating everything. Not everyone has the luxury of eating an entire pizza and staying at their target, bathing suit weight. It's sweet and fruity and actually has a pretty good oolong tea taste. It's not the best I've had, but for a powder made from another powder, beggars can't be choosers.

Don't be a jerk to diet drinks and don't be a jerk to people on diets. I'm guilty, but at least I'm aware of it.

The first time I ever had a Rockstar drink was also the first time that I had an energy drink. It was around 2003 and I was at the skate park hanging out and this dude who just got back from California and brought us back these tall drinks. It was a very generous and thoughtful gesture. We all took a sip and, like we have all said in most reviews, it tasted like a trillion Smarties crushed up in a crappy tea. From that point on, I didn't drink energy drinks until I started doing this site. A lot has happened to the world since my unsuccessful gateway drug into the downward spiral that is energy drinks has now pulled a switcheroo and started making relaxation drinks.

First sip of this knocked me off my seat. Not because it was good but because it was infinitely "diet." Sting and all. The flavor was quite the kick in the pants, too. I cannot argue that it is tropical guava flavor but it has been so candied and dieted that guavas worldwide should be insulted to be affiliated with this drink. It's just ramped up to eleven and doesn't let go to your mouth or throat.

Cut to an hour later and I could have taken a nice nap. I'm not a stressful man by any means and I actually hate naps. Do you know when the weather is just dreary and gray and it's like three in the afternoon, nothing is on TV, you don't want to play video games and you decide that you're going to just take a nap? That's what this drink was like. I felt quiet inside. I felt...not bored...but like my body was telling me that there is nothing better to do than take a nap. An hour after that, thankfully, it wore off and I was back to my normal self.

I'm drinking the other half that I didn't want to drink because I've got to do a bit of driving in the very near future and I don't want to be sleepy while doing so. We'll see what happens. If you don't hate diet drinks and need to calm down because you're a spazz of have self-diagnosed yourself with a sleeping disorder that could easily be fixed by you not drinking so many darn cups of coffee or energy drinks, compound your addictive nature and get this. If you just want to relax and care what you ingest, get a Marley's. I would choose it ninety-nine times to this.

Powder drink mixes are great. They fit in small, secret locations so you can have a drink made out of water that you can buy anywhere. This tea is surprising, it is because the white tea leaves and blueberries and yes, a little bit of artificial sweetener, were zapped with a sweet laser that just turned whatever it hit into powder. The company sets up the leaves and everything on a special table in a special room, put on their protective goggles and zap away carefully. Once everything was powderized, they would take the janitors broom, climb on top of the table, and sweep the powder into a garbage can to be brought to the packaging facility.

The answer to your question is "yes." "What question?" you ask? The question of "Do they shoot other things with that sweet laser?" Yeah, dude. It's the ultimate prank prop. They powderize people's shoes and put the powder back in their locker. They powderize some of the people's food, like sandwiches and stuff, and put it back in the tupperware with a Post-It note that says "Just Add Water" and put it back in the fridge. They have a lot of fun but they never are unsafe around the laser. They know its powerful powers and do take safety precautions around it.

With this tea they created, they actually got it down. Nice, light bitterness, good berry flavor, and although it is a bit diet, it's better than regular, bottled diet iced teas. The bitterness covers up any nasty dietness that arises pretty quickly.

I don't know if they are hiring, but they will, for a small fee, powderize anything you want them to. You just need to supply a container to get rid of the dust and you also need to clean it up. They're not working for you. Also, a powderized ham sandwich tastes just as good in a little bit of water. It's frightening, but true.

As the herd of horses circled Hans, he was a bit worried. He had just knocked over eleven motorcycles like dominoes like in Pee Wee's Big Adventure at a local bar. He was reading a map and walking backwards, a poor combination, and bumped into a bike ever so gently. Knocked them all down, one after another. It all happened in slow motion. All of the bikers came out of the bar because they knew what had happened. They saw Hans standing there, shoulders shrugged, knowing that he was the cause of the mess, and came towards him. He jumped in an old Volkswagon Beetle that a young woman had left the keys in and sped down the street.

After about five minutes, Hans looked back, stopped the car, got out and looked for a phone to call someone. He walked towards a phone, picked it up and didn't hear a dial tone. He looked down and the wire had been cut. Just as he hung up the phone, he heard the galloping of what sounded like a hundred hooves. He turned around and there were a dozen guys on horses staring him down. They had found him. He was in trouble. They all came towards him slowly, yelling in Portuguese, which he couldn't understand because he was born and raised in Boise, Idaho. In high school he only had his option between French and Spanish.

With his back up against a wall, he looked around for some sort of out. He didn't see one until he looked in the Beetle and saw a sparkle in the cup holder. He ran to the car and took out a can of Gazzu. He saw that it was an energy drink and that's exactly what he needed at this point. He opened it up and drank half the can. Feeling the effects kick in immediately, he just started to run. In his head, he thought that he would get some sort of super strength and "Red Rover" through the line of impenetrable muscle.

As he ran towards them, he took a few more sips to ensure a break of the chain of strength. It was for naught as when he ran square into the largest man, he simply fell on the ground and saw stars. The men dragged him by his collar back to the bar. He sipped the Gazzu in hopes that he would muster up enough strength to break free. Now that he had the time to taste the drink, he noticed that it was incredibly sweet. It did taste like a majorly carbonated orange juice with candy in it. He liked the taste and drank the rest of the can before he got back to the scene of the crime.

The men told him to pick up each of the bikes and they said they didn't mind because all of their bikes were pretty beat up. The Gazzu gave Hans the energy he needed to lift all the bikes and put them back how he found them. Then the men invited him into the bar to buy him a drink. They weren't mad that he knocked down the bikes, they were mad he was a coward and ran. He learned that day that he would stand up for himself. Just then, a large woman kicked in the door to the bar and asked to see the man that stole her Beetle. Hans ran out the back door and was never seen in that part of town again.

I've been craving candy lately. Sweet Tarts, Twizzlers, and Spree are usually my go-to candy. The problem is that the corner store by my house has all their candy behind the counter due to hooligans stealing it. I'm pretty comfortable with watching cartoons and drinking an obscene amount of soda at the age of 30, but for some reason I can't bring myself to ask the man behind the counter for a bag of Skittles.

But that's okay because thanks to energy drinks, I get my candy fix every once in a while because 99% of them are melted candy in a can. This one is Sweet Tarts, and it's great! It's got a bit of a gnarly diet aftertaste, but it's not as bad as most diet energy drinks.

Are you diabetic and tired of diet sodas that taste like mouthwash? Are you sick of giving your hard earned money to multi-billion dollar corporations like Pepsi or Coca-Cola? Do you want an alternative? Well here it is! Johnnie Ryan Diet Cola! Developed and bottled in Niagara Falls, NY (yes, THAT Niagara Falls), Johnnie Ryan is a local staple of Western New York. While they still use sucralose as their dietary sweetener, they managed to make it not taste like battery acid like so many other diet colas do. The minimal bite means that even your grandma will be able to enjoy this pop. Now don't just sit there, get up and go buy a bottle from your local corner store!*

*This drink may not be available at all local corner stores. Check with the proprietor of the establishment to see if they have it in stock. No purchase necessary, void where prohibited.

All energy shots are basically everything in a large can or energy drink condensed into a little bottle. It's to be expected that the flavor is going to be very strong and not too pleasant. If you take three of those little bottles and boil them down and make one bottle out of the trio you get one of these. When it's in your mouth it just tastes like an extremely concentrated strong grape flavor, but the instant you breathe in the most intense chemical energy drink taste I've ever experienced. It's not very good, but that is not the point with energy shots. No one buys something like this for a nice tasty treat. The point of them is for strong, lasting energy and when it comes to that this shot certainly pulls through.

Girlfriend, you know I love you. I know you, too, and I know that you like things that sparkle: diamonds, gems, rubies, and the lot. I can't wait until your birthday, Christmas, Valentine's Day, or even Sweetest Day to let you in on this secret, but I bought you something that sparkles. It's not much, but when I saw it I thought of you. Here, my baby. This is for you.

What do you mean "What is it?" It's sparkling lemonade. It's sparkles, like my girl. Go ahead. Taste it. What do you think? It's good, right? Yeah. Baby. That's right. It's good, right? Baby? Do you like it? What's that questioning look? Oh. It's that it wasn't jewelry. That's fine. Oh, you do like it. Great. It's pretty good. A little diet, yes. Your delightful little tongue is no liar. It's not a terrible lemonade flavor. It's not too bad. For only two calories it could surly be a whole lot worse.

So there you are, one bottle of a sparkling drink for my sparkling fiancè. You've earned it. Speaking of earning it, I believe that you mentioned something about a chocolate cream pie. I believe I am quite deserving of that.

Ma'am, please. Get down here in the bomb shelter before another bomb goes off. Shut the door. We don't want any bad guys or shrapnel coming down here. This is a safe zone. You never thought you'd be in a bomb shelter, did you? Well, here beneath the Jewish school, we've been stocking up. Notice how we have separate shelves for meats and dairy. I'm not even Jewish and I can appreciate the orthodox nature of this organized bomb shelter. Sure, until the smoke clears, we won't be able to eat a cheeseburger or pepperoni pizza, but I can deal with it. We've got plenty of Twinkies and this canned hot chocolate. It's diet because if we lived off nothing but Twinkies, gelt, and non-diet hot cocoa, we wouldn't be able to make it up the stairs because we would have gained so much weight.

We've got like fourteen cases of this hot cocoa and eleven car batteries to run the microwave and space heater. Can I make you a can? Yes? Great. It will be ready in a minute.

Here you are. Piping warm. What do you think? Yeah, I got that, too. It's good at first and then gets really diet tasting. You always know that it's hot cocoa, but it's got a constant sucralose undertone. It's not bad. Sure, we've also got bottled water, but this is in a can, which I feel is chemical bomb proof. You know what? On second though, this might be harder than we thought. Why? Well...how to put this...they stocked the food, have blankets, batteries, water, but they're forgetting one thing. Toilets. There is nowhere to go to the bathroom and there is a concrete floor that is four feet thick so we can't even go in a hole. Looks like that room that you thought was yours is going to have a handful of pee corners. Sorry, ma'am.

The journey has been long and hard. I've come so far that I never thought it would end like this. Here I sit bleeding out after some lame ogres performed a sneak attack on me. I can't believe I didn't see those big lunks coming. Seriously they are about as graceful as drunken elephants, yet they got the drop on me. I had so much gold that I could hardly carry it. Also, my weapons were at their highest level. Now it's all gone. I am going to die with nothing but the clothes on my back…€¦wait a minute! I totally forgot that I had stashed a vile of the essence of Mana in my boot. I took it out of my satchel because I was afraid my abundance of gold would crush it. I really thought I was going to need this when I fought the dark wizard, but if I don't drink it now I'm never going to make it to her lair anyways. Bottoms up. Oh my god this is horrible. I think perchance the keeper of the inn I stayed at a few nights ago switched out my Mana for some tropical flavored floor cleaner. The taste is something I would associate with a fluid that would burn on the way down, yet it is smooth. Smooth and horribly gross. It looks like I am going to die after all, and now with the taste of foolishness in my mouth. What's this? I can feel something surging in me. My wound seems to be healing and my strength is returning. Mana may taste like garbage, but it sure is doing its job correctly. I feel better than I have in years. The energy coursing through my veins is unstoppable. Now I'm off to find those ogres and crush some skulls to get my gear and riches back.

The zero calorie Cascade Ice drinks are basically just flavored seltzer water. The 2-calorie version on the other hand is lightly sweetened with sucralose. It's not enough for it to taste overly diet. Actually, this is the least diet tasting diet drink I have ever tasted. It actually is made with pink grapefruit juice concentrate, which gives it an authentic grapefruit taste. The artificial sweetener makes sure that it's not overly bitter like straight grapefruit juice would be. This also has an incredibly strong grapefruit scent to it. I enjoyed this way more than anyone would have expected.