Coffee - 242 Reviews
Victor Allen Iced Latte Mocha
I predict there will be a divide over this product, albeit with a narrow margin. People who love coffee will say, “It's pretty meh. It doesn't really like coffee.” People who are indifferent about coffee will say, “It's decent enough. It doesn't really taste like coffee.” At least everyone will agree on something.
This is more of an adult chocolate milk than it is an actually espresso drink. If I were handed a glass of this with no description I would assume it was some sort of weak malt drink. There probably sound like complaints, but I did enjoy the taste of this. In fact it is because it doesn't have a strong coffee flavor that makes it a better drink. It is chocolate and sweet with a little something around the edges that makes it a little interesting.
This is more of an adult chocolate milk than it is an actually espresso drink. If I were handed a glass of this with no description I would assume it was some sort of weak malt drink. There probably sound like complaints, but I did enjoy the taste of this. In fact it is because it doesn't have a strong coffee flavor that makes it a better drink. It is chocolate and sweet with a little something around the edges that makes it a little interesting.
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- Coffee
- Company
- Victor Allen — Website
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- United States
- Sweetener
- Sugar
- Author
- Jason Draper on 11/4/16, 3:52 PM
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Sunup Green Coffee
This beverage leads me to ask the question, Why waste your time roasting coffee beans when you can just brew the green beans? As it turns out you'll save time and it has a more palatable taste (according to my taste buds). You also get the same amount of caffeine plus some antioxidants.
If someone were to ask me to describe how this tastes I would immediately respond that it tastes like someone brewed a pot of coffee, dumped it down the drain, then somehow brewed some yerba mate tea in the same coffee maker without cleaning it out. After that they dumped a bunch of sugar in it. It has a very earthy taste (hence the yerba mate descriptor) and only vaguely tastes like the coffee flavor that comes to mind when you think about said beverage.
This is definitely something that tastes extremely weird and off the first time you try it. I quickly grew to enjoy it though. It's an entirely different beast than your typical coffee, and I could see it turning off hardcore coffee fans who may see it as a bastardization of their holy beverage (coffee people are crazy, right?). On the other hand I could see it being something that those who don't normally like coffee enjoy (oh look, that's me).
If someone were to ask me to describe how this tastes I would immediately respond that it tastes like someone brewed a pot of coffee, dumped it down the drain, then somehow brewed some yerba mate tea in the same coffee maker without cleaning it out. After that they dumped a bunch of sugar in it. It has a very earthy taste (hence the yerba mate descriptor) and only vaguely tastes like the coffee flavor that comes to mind when you think about said beverage.
This is definitely something that tastes extremely weird and off the first time you try it. I quickly grew to enjoy it though. It's an entirely different beast than your typical coffee, and I could see it turning off hardcore coffee fans who may see it as a bastardization of their holy beverage (coffee people are crazy, right?). On the other hand I could see it being something that those who don't normally like coffee enjoy (oh look, that's me).
- Rating
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- Coffee
- Country
- United States
- Sweetener
- Organic Dried Cane Syrup
- Author
- Jason Draper on 10/12/16, 2:00 PM
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Tim Horton's Iced Coffee Vanilla
This tastes like a candle and also tastes like it sucks. No stars. Wait...I can't do no stars? This website sucks almost as much as this drink. I said, "Could I have an iced coffee with vanilla, please?" and I think they misheard "vanilla" and thought I said candle wax. Three sips. There goes $2.16. Cripes. Grozz. Ugh. These are the sounds that I am audibly saying at work aloud as people try to work. "Try to work" is code for "fantasy football" so it sounds like everyone has a hearing impediment today.
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- Coffee
- Company
- Tim Horton's — Website — @TimHortonsNews
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- United States
- Sweetener
- Not Listed
- Author
- Mike Literman on 9/26/16, 10:49 AM
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Stok Cold Brew Iced Coffee Black
Oh how I wish I had one of these now. No, not a 48 ounce bottle as that would be suicidal but the smaller, equally available 10 ounce bottle. Long nights, friends. Long nights. I know it would make me sick and dizzy but anything over this underslept feeling, which is garbage. I took a shot or two of this over the weekend, you know, just to get by, and it was nice. It was smooth, and although advertised as "not too sweet" it was definitely sweetened and possibly more than many people would like.
I don't have a preference as far as coffee goes, as you may well know, but sweet and usually with some sort of syrup is preferable. This met the criteria just fine. Lucky for me, there is a 48 ounce bottle with two shots missing at home waiting, for a girl like me (to come into my life).
I don't have a preference as far as coffee goes, as you may well know, but sweet and usually with some sort of syrup is preferable. This met the criteria just fine. Lucky for me, there is a 48 ounce bottle with two shots missing at home waiting, for a girl like me (to come into my life).
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- Coffee
- Company
- Stok — Website — @SToKCoffee
- Country
- United States
- Sweetener
- Cane Sugar
- Author
- Mike Literman on 9/26/16, 6:01 AM
- Buy It Amazon.com
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Chameleon Cold-Brew Mexican Coffee
Things I've recently learned about myself include the fact that if you make a coffee drink “Mexican” I will probably love it. Generally that means adding cinnamon and chilies to it. I also think of it as having to do with chocolate since my first forays into it were with Mexican hot chocolate. This does not have chocolate. Actually it doesn't have chilies either. That doesn't stop it from being amazing though. What it does contain is high quality cold brewed coffee, cane sugar, vanilla, almond and cinnamon. The results are flat out fantastic. It's one of the best coffee beverages I have ever tasted. Even with all of the added ingredients the coffee is still the main flavor, and it's smooth and delicious. The other things are just icing on an already delicious cake. There is something about this that makes me think of a drink from when I was younger, but I can't put my finger on what that drink is. I know it's the cinnamon that's pointing me in that direction though. While you could drink this at any point in the day, it would be perfect as a dessert beverage.
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- Coffee
- Company
- Chameleon Cold-Brew — Website — @ChameleonCoffee
- Country
- United States
- Sweetener
- Organic Cane Sugar
- Author
- Jason Draper on 9/11/16, 8:20 AM
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Starbucks Iced Coffee Chile Mocha
Whether or not there was coffee in this is another story, but this was fantastic, man. It had the earthiness from the chilies and the cinnamon. Really, I don't know if there was coffee in this and if there was, it was highly masked by the rest of the flavors. It wasn't spicy as much as it was the flavor of green chile. The chile and cinnamon were generously sprinkled on like a medium dusting from the spice fairy, a fictitious (presumably) creature that puts spices on food and drinks alike. The mocha was a good umbrella flavor. I don't go to Starbucks often but as soon as I saw this was out, I ditched whatever lunch plans I had and went there and was pleasantly pleased I didn't have to pull the old, "Do you have this? You don't? Welp, see you later." and walk out the door awkwardly. We've all done it. It's one thing to do it in a restaurant but have you ever done it in a drive through? Way worse. When the person wants you to pay for your meal and you have to say, "Oh, no. You didn't have what I wanted so now I have to sit in line with the rest of these buffoons." that's the worst. This was in stock and supposedly for a limited time, too so hurry on over and get one.
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- Coffee
- Company
- Starbucks — Website — @starbucks
- Country
- United States
- Sweetener
- Not Listed
- Author
- Mike Literman on 9/9/16, 10:41 AM
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Tim Horton's Iced Cappuccino Twix
Twix, a cookie not a candy bar, is a wonderful cookie not a candy bar. Carmel, crunch, caramel and chocolate. If we're talking about "The Four C's," screw diamonds, dude. Twix is where it's at. How is this though? Sweet. I don't even know after all these years if there is any coffee in iced cappuccino, or as we in Western New York like to call them, "Iced Capps," anymore. They might be but it's so overpowered by sugar and cream and now cookie crumbles that what's the point anymore. This small was more than enough. There was probably the amount of a "fun size" Twix grinded up on the top which was fun to get through the straw at the end. The rest was just a sugary blur of cookie flavors and brown. I say that like it's a bad thing. Look, if you're the type of person to buy an iced cappuccino, you know what you're getting into and you know what you're doing to yourself. I'm not going to say it, but deep down you know what you're up to.
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- Tim Horton's — Website — @TimHortonsNews
- Country
- United States
- Sweetener
- Not Listed
- Author
- Mike Literman on 8/17/16, 11:29 AM
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La Colombe Draft Latte
I don't know what's happening to me, but I think I'm starting to like coffee. Well at least fancy “ready to drink” coffee. The past couple that I have tried (minus the Marley) I have actually enjoyed a great deal. Something about them has been different though. Even though they have been a variety or different preparations they have all been very smooth with little acidity. In the world of coffee smooth is the descriptor that I am looking for.
This is a “Draft Latte” which I'm pretty sure is a term that La Colombe invented. It's a can of frothed milk with a shot of cold-pressed espresso added (hence the smoothness). There is no added sweetener and there doesn't need to be. You can get a taste for the actual coffee and the milk (I do with it were almond or soy, but I'll enjoy what I can get). I don't really understand how the milk stays frothy, but it really does have that specific feel/taste. Okay I just looked it up and it's the way the can is pressurized that froths the milk when you crack it open. That's good science there.
I'm certainly not Mr Fancy Pants in most aspects of my life, but when it comes to coffee that's apparently what I need. I wish I could talk about the roast or whatever, but that is lost on me. This tastes like coffee when coffee is good. It's frothy, smooth and wonderful.
This is a “Draft Latte” which I'm pretty sure is a term that La Colombe invented. It's a can of frothed milk with a shot of cold-pressed espresso added (hence the smoothness). There is no added sweetener and there doesn't need to be. You can get a taste for the actual coffee and the milk (I do with it were almond or soy, but I'll enjoy what I can get). I don't really understand how the milk stays frothy, but it really does have that specific feel/taste. Okay I just looked it up and it's the way the can is pressurized that froths the milk when you crack it open. That's good science there.
I'm certainly not Mr Fancy Pants in most aspects of my life, but when it comes to coffee that's apparently what I need. I wish I could talk about the roast or whatever, but that is lost on me. This tastes like coffee when coffee is good. It's frothy, smooth and wonderful.
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- Coffee
- Company
- La Colombe — Website — @LaColombeCoffee
- Country
- United States
- Sweetener
- No Sugar Added
- Author
- Jason Draper on 7/6/16, 3:33 PM
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Marley's One Drop Vanilla Chocolate Twist
As I've said a million times, I'm not a huge coffee fan. I do like coffee ice cream though. It's toned down and it is delicious most of the time. When I saw that Marley now made a vanilla chocolate swirl coffee drink my first thought was “Well there goes keeping up a brand image.” What on earth did Bob Marley have to do with ice cream? Did he ever sing about it? Not that I know of, but I've never really delved into his catalog. My second thought was “Is this really a necessary flavor?” It's like they are marketing coffee to kids. Being a big dumb kid myself I obviously picked up a can. You know what? It actually tastes like someone made a cup of coffee and then cooled it down by letting a soft serve twist melt in it. It has a very accurate flavor, but unfortunately who actually wants that flavor once they try it? It was good for about two sips and then it got to be a bit too much. Also, there is a weird almost banana taste to this. There is no banana in it, unless that's where they got the potassium, but it has this weird underflavor that isn't quite the fruit, but close. With each sip the mystery flavor got stronger and my enjoyment decreased. This just seems unnecessary and only well executed for a short period of time. No banana no cry.
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- Coffee
- Company
- Marley's — Website — @drinkmellowmood
- Country
- United States
- Sweetener
- Pure Cane Sugar
- Author
- Jason Draper on 7/5/16, 7:13 AM
- Buy It Amazon.com
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Zingerman's Coffee Company Cold Brew Coffee
Many fools out there would consider us experts when it comes to the beverage world. The truth is we are just two dumb guys who like to drink a lot of drinks and write about what we think about them because we are apparently narcissistic and think the world needs to know our opinions, you know like the rest of the internet. Actually this is something that keeps us busy. It's our version of collecting stamps, records, or comics. Whatever our reason for doing what we do, and no matter what people think of us, no one has ever mistook us for authorities when it comes to coffee. We are complete idiots when it comes to this field of beverages and we have no idea what the little things about certain coffees coffee are that make them more desirable than other coffees. Keeping that in mind this is what I have to say about Zingerman's Cold Brew.
This tastes like…โฌยฆcoffee. There is nothing extra added to it, just straight up brewed coffee beans. I don't know if that is technically correct since it is cold brewed for 16-24 hours and it doesn't get heated up (I always think of brewing as “cooking.” Am I wrong?). The reason for this is that it reduces the acid and makes the coffee smoother. I can actually acknowledge that this does seem smoother than “iced coffees” that I have had. So it's got that going for it. I'm not going to sit here and pretend that I can detect the different notes in the coffee, because my palate isn't that refined. All I can say is that it tastes like coffee with no harshness to it. It's not the kind of drink that is going to win me over and make me a card carrying member of the Loyal Order of Coffee Aficionados , but I do enjoy it more than I have enjoyed other straight coffees that I have tasted, so that's something.
This tastes like…โฌยฆcoffee. There is nothing extra added to it, just straight up brewed coffee beans. I don't know if that is technically correct since it is cold brewed for 16-24 hours and it doesn't get heated up (I always think of brewing as “cooking.” Am I wrong?). The reason for this is that it reduces the acid and makes the coffee smoother. I can actually acknowledge that this does seem smoother than “iced coffees” that I have had. So it's got that going for it. I'm not going to sit here and pretend that I can detect the different notes in the coffee, because my palate isn't that refined. All I can say is that it tastes like coffee with no harshness to it. It's not the kind of drink that is going to win me over and make me a card carrying member of the Loyal Order of Coffee Aficionados , but I do enjoy it more than I have enjoyed other straight coffees that I have tasted, so that's something.
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- Coffee
- Company
- Zingerman's Coffee Company — Website — @zingermans
- Country
- United States
- Sweetener
- No Sugar Added
- Author
- Jason Draper on 6/8/16, 7:33 AM
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Uncommon Coffee Roasters Cold Brew Coffee With Half & Half
I'm, probably in the minority with this but I find milk to be completely and utterly (udderly for those who want dads jokes) disgusting. The thought of drinking glass of milk..just ick. Luckily I can turn off my brain to it when it's in other drink, such as this delicious cold brew coffee. Sure, I would have preferred this to have almond or soy milk instead of real deal cow grossness, but when something tastes this good you overlook the bad.
The black version of this was smooth as it was, but the addition of the half & half just makes it the subject of a Rob Thomas/Santana song. The coffee itself is delicious and the small amount of added sugar would make this enjoyable to anyone out there who has even the smallest interest in coffee, and perhaps even others who have no interest.
I said it before, but it bears repeating; if this was what your standard coffee tasted like I would drink it all of the time. I would become one of those people who just aren't themselves until they get the first cup of the day in them. I would welcome that misery and dependence into my life. This is that good.
The black version of this was smooth as it was, but the addition of the half & half just makes it the subject of a Rob Thomas/Santana song. The coffee itself is delicious and the small amount of added sugar would make this enjoyable to anyone out there who has even the smallest interest in coffee, and perhaps even others who have no interest.
I said it before, but it bears repeating; if this was what your standard coffee tasted like I would drink it all of the time. I would become one of those people who just aren't themselves until they get the first cup of the day in them. I would welcome that misery and dependence into my life. This is that good.
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- Coffee
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- Uncommon Coffee Roasters — Website — @SaugatuckUCR
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- United States
- Sweetener
- Sugar
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- Jason Draper on 5/16/16, 11:18 PM
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Starbucks Doubleshot Mexican Mocha
Oh the high hopes I had for this. Mexican mocha? Really? A nice, chocolate cinnamon coffee drink? Well if that's what you expect, you will most certainly be disappointed. It might be coffee, alright. Might. This only has a hint of almost every ingredient but cream. It tastes like creamy sugar with coffee and cinnamon essence. It's strangely thick.
I didn't like it. There I said it. It tastes like a diet drink and is not a diet drink. It hardly tastes like coffee, which I expect out of a coffee drink and the Mexican part of it is so faint that it almost isn't worth mentioned. Do it or don't do it, Starbucks. You can afford to do either. Small, test batches. Amp up the spice and send a can to me. I'd love to review something polarizing and accurate.
I didn't like it. There I said it. It tastes like a diet drink and is not a diet drink. It hardly tastes like coffee, which I expect out of a coffee drink and the Mexican part of it is so faint that it almost isn't worth mentioned. Do it or don't do it, Starbucks. You can afford to do either. Small, test batches. Amp up the spice and send a can to me. I'd love to review something polarizing and accurate.
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- Categories
- Coffee and Energy Drink
- Company
- Starbucks — Website — @starbucks
- Country
- United States
- Sweetener
- Sugar
- Author
- Mike Literman on 5/16/16, 11:25 AM
- Buy It Amazon.com
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Uncommon Coffee Roasters Cold Brew Coffee Chocolate Milk
Jay drank the straight and loved it. I drank the straight and it was coffee. I don't like coffee too much. Iced coffee has to have some sort of syrup in it for me to deal with it. Chocolate mostly. This, though, this was real coffee with chocolate milk in it and it made a world of difference. Also, I don't know what they added to the beans but man was I jumpy. Jay was jumpy when he drank his. I drank half and was out of my skin, man. It sure did go down smooth, though. Until the jitters, I was prepared to give Uncommon my bank account information to auto debit my account periodically to keep this stuff coming. The jitters turned me off to that notion but it shouldn't you. I don't drink enough coffee to be accustomed to the feeling of caffeine surging through my veins. I don't know if I want to be I'll tell you what I want, more of this. It was delicious.
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- Coffee
- Company
- Uncommon Coffee Roasters — Website — @SaugatuckUCR
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- United States
- Sweetener
- Sugar
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- Mike Literman on 5/12/16, 1:01 PM
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Uncommon Coffee Roasters Cold Brew Coffee Straight
I've been home from Europe for four days now and my sleep schedule is no closer to getting back on track. I keep waking up sometime between 6 and 7am (normally I get up at 9) and find myself getting ridiculously sleepy at 10pm (normally 2am is bedtime). I just got out of work printing shirts all day and I'm worn out. This is not good because I have dinner plans and I'm going to see Youth Code tonight, who I have missed twice already and I'll be damned if sleep is the cause of a third whiff. Just as I'm contemplating going to pick up an energy drink the doorbell rings. It's Mr. Fed Ex and he has a perishable package for me. Inside are a bunch of pre-chilled cold brew coffees. The timing couldn't have been better.
I'd like to say that as soon as I shut the door I ripped one of these bad boys open and started my journey to Caffeine City, but packaging made that impossible. Now I appreciate the use of cardboard cartons in beverages for their lower environmental impact but I have never once in my life been able to properly open one of these things. Even in elementary school my milk carton would look like a mangled soggy mess by the time I got it open. This coffee is no different. Some cardboard stuck where it shouldn't have. Other areas just straight up ripped. It's a mess, but what it contains more than made up for it.
Mike and I have been very vocal about not being huge coffee fans. I can drink it and I understand the allure, but it's not something that I fully enjoy. This though, this is just fantastic. The flavor might be called straight, but even though it's just filtered water and cold brewed coffee, that coffee has “notes” of walnut, caramel and chocolate, or so the box tells me. This is the smoothest coffee I have ever tasted, not to mention the best tasting. I have always loved the way that ground coffee beans smell, and this is the first time I've ever tasted it brewed where the flavor matched that smell. If this is how all coffee smelled I would be an addict like most Americans. Lucky for me most coffee is a pale comparison to this, so I don't need it to function. I will definitely buy this again though when I come across it in stores.
Now let's see if this caffeine will keep me up so I can enjoy some industrial revival tonight.
I'd like to say that as soon as I shut the door I ripped one of these bad boys open and started my journey to Caffeine City, but packaging made that impossible. Now I appreciate the use of cardboard cartons in beverages for their lower environmental impact but I have never once in my life been able to properly open one of these things. Even in elementary school my milk carton would look like a mangled soggy mess by the time I got it open. This coffee is no different. Some cardboard stuck where it shouldn't have. Other areas just straight up ripped. It's a mess, but what it contains more than made up for it.
Mike and I have been very vocal about not being huge coffee fans. I can drink it and I understand the allure, but it's not something that I fully enjoy. This though, this is just fantastic. The flavor might be called straight, but even though it's just filtered water and cold brewed coffee, that coffee has “notes” of walnut, caramel and chocolate, or so the box tells me. This is the smoothest coffee I have ever tasted, not to mention the best tasting. I have always loved the way that ground coffee beans smell, and this is the first time I've ever tasted it brewed where the flavor matched that smell. If this is how all coffee smelled I would be an addict like most Americans. Lucky for me most coffee is a pale comparison to this, so I don't need it to function. I will definitely buy this again though when I come across it in stores.
Now let's see if this caffeine will keep me up so I can enjoy some industrial revival tonight.
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- Categories
- Coffee
- Company
- Uncommon Coffee Roasters — Website — @SaugatuckUCR
- Country
- United States
- Sweetener
- No Sugar Added
- Author
- Jason Draper on 5/5/16, 5:22 PM
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Dunkin' Donuts Iced Coffee Pistachio
My brother is getting married. I am in Arizona and it is hot. Some might call it "a dry heat" but no matter which way you cut it, 87 degrees is hot. My poor, frail, pale Buffalo skin hasn't seen the sun since September so coming off a six month winter as we do most years, I am worried that I am going to burn to a beyond-aloe status.
What do I do when on "vacation?" Well besides eat huevos rancheros, I (apparently) go to Dunkin' Donuts and get new iced coffees because that's what I did tonight. Pistachio, that's what I chose as (I don't think) we have it in Buffalo. How was it? Well it was very light and worried me. It just looked like straight cream and I didn't have any idea what it was going to taste like. It ended up being pretty good, though. It tasted like pistachios, which is saying a lot since I would wager a guess that no actual pistachios have ever touched this mix. It tastes like pistachio ice cream, which I love and wish I had right now. If you're into that, add the essence of coffee and you might have a recipe for success.
Phoenix? We don't know who is going to win this battle but if I were a betting man, I would say that the odds are in your favor. At least I got to cool down for the ten minutes the Dunkin' Donuts was open before they closed at six which I find a little bit early but what do I know? Nothing. I don't live here and I don't know these people. I know nothing.
What do I do when on "vacation?" Well besides eat huevos rancheros, I (apparently) go to Dunkin' Donuts and get new iced coffees because that's what I did tonight. Pistachio, that's what I chose as (I don't think) we have it in Buffalo. How was it? Well it was very light and worried me. It just looked like straight cream and I didn't have any idea what it was going to taste like. It ended up being pretty good, though. It tasted like pistachios, which is saying a lot since I would wager a guess that no actual pistachios have ever touched this mix. It tastes like pistachio ice cream, which I love and wish I had right now. If you're into that, add the essence of coffee and you might have a recipe for success.
Phoenix? We don't know who is going to win this battle but if I were a betting man, I would say that the odds are in your favor. At least I got to cool down for the ten minutes the Dunkin' Donuts was open before they closed at six which I find a little bit early but what do I know? Nothing. I don't live here and I don't know these people. I know nothing.
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- Coffee
- Company
- Dunkin' Donuts — Website — @DunkinDonuts
- Country
- United States
- Sweetener
- Not Listed
- Author
- Mike Literman on 4/14/16, 10:38 PM
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Tim Horton's Iced Coffee Mocha
Experience 1: I go to Tim Horton's and order a mocha iced coffee. Lady says, "Do you want cream or sugar?" I respond, "No, thank you." She says, "Do you want it black?" I respond, "I just want it how it comes." She says, "Alright." and gives me one cream and one sugar. I did not like it.
Experience 2: I go to Tim Horton's and order a mocha iced coffee. Lady says, "Do you want cream or sugar?" I respond, "No, thank you." Different lady hands me the coffee and says, "I put more chocolate in it so it's not so bitter." I did not like it.
Tim Horton's. I want what I want and order it as such. If I wanted cream, I would ask for cream. If I wanted sugar, I would ask for sugar. If I wanted an extra shot of mocha, I would ask for an extra shot of mocha. Start listening to me and stop treating your job like a jazz solo and improvising what you think people might want.
Experience 2: I go to Tim Horton's and order a mocha iced coffee. Lady says, "Do you want cream or sugar?" I respond, "No, thank you." Different lady hands me the coffee and says, "I put more chocolate in it so it's not so bitter." I did not like it.
Tim Horton's. I want what I want and order it as such. If I wanted cream, I would ask for cream. If I wanted sugar, I would ask for sugar. If I wanted an extra shot of mocha, I would ask for an extra shot of mocha. Start listening to me and stop treating your job like a jazz solo and improvising what you think people might want.
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- Coffee
- Company
- Tim Horton's — Website — @TimHortonsNews
- Country
- United States
- Sweetener
- Not Listed
- Author
- Mike Literman on 4/5/16, 5:10 PM
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REBBL Super Herb Elixer Maca Cold-Brew
Number one. Wow, this is an expensive drink. Jay bought it for me because he is as generous a man as he is a lover. Price tag reads $5.29 and that is a lot of green. How does it taste? Better than you would initially think I bet. It also got me hella jazzed. I drank half of the bottle and now I feel like I need to run or puke. Don't take the "puke" in a bad way. I don't know what to do when I get over caffeinated.
It has a good coffee taste and actually doesn't taste too much like coconut. That's a good thing for me and maybe not a good thing for you, I don't know. It's got some new age ingredients (sunflower lecithin?) but all tree hugging aside, I could have drunk this whole thing if it wasn't for my poor ability to process caffeine.
Now I'm going to drive home jacked up. Maybe that longboard is in the parking lot and I can push some of the energy out. That will be a nice surprise for both my legs and my eyes. The little things.
It has a good coffee taste and actually doesn't taste too much like coconut. That's a good thing for me and maybe not a good thing for you, I don't know. It's got some new age ingredients (sunflower lecithin?) but all tree hugging aside, I could have drunk this whole thing if it wasn't for my poor ability to process caffeine.
Now I'm going to drive home jacked up. Maybe that longboard is in the parking lot and I can push some of the energy out. That will be a nice surprise for both my legs and my eyes. The little things.
- Rating
- Company
- REBBL — Website — @REBBLTonic
- Country
- United States
- Sweetener
- Organic Coconut Sugar
- Author
- Mike Literman on 3/22/16, 5:16 PM
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Monster Java Salted Caramel
Sometimes your ladyfriend nicely makes you dinner when you are sick, even when she just had a long day of school/work and is exhausted herself. She grinds up the always great garlic salt mix from Trader Joes to spice it up a bit for you. Not often, but sometimes, in her delirious state she doesn't realize that she left the cap on and goes to add more when she tastes it and it doesn't seem to be doing anything. This time she remembers to take the cap off and an obscene salty mess tumbles into your otherwise delicious meal. You don't want to be rude, or unappreciative, so you eat it, sodium and all. Now it's a week later and you have a can of Salted Caramel Java Monster in front of you and all you can think of is how salty that meal was and if this tastes even a fraction like that, there's no way you will be able to enjoy it. Salt could be ruined forever, and that would be a horrible life to lead. I mean think of all the salsa and guacamole I would miss out on? That's not a life I have any interest in living.
Somehow, like in a dumb sitcom, everything turned out just fine. It wasn't overly salty. In fact it has only the faintest trace of sodium, which is how drinks should be. No one wants a salty drink, unless it's some boozy concoction on a beach, and even then I don't understand it. This has a general canned coffee flavor to it, with some small traces of caramel. There is another flavor that people tend to overdo it with. With a confection that is pretty much just burned sugar, less is usually more. I want hints of it, not a sore jaw from chewing a hunk of it for hours. Luckily there is no trace of the energy drink flavor in here. The idea of it mixed with coffee, is pretty wretched, and Monster seems aware of that, so they keep them separate.
Overall I found myself enjoying this way more than I had anticipated. It's nothing terribly special, but I had overall low expectations and every single one of them were surpassed. Aim low and you'll never miss the mark.
Somehow, like in a dumb sitcom, everything turned out just fine. It wasn't overly salty. In fact it has only the faintest trace of sodium, which is how drinks should be. No one wants a salty drink, unless it's some boozy concoction on a beach, and even then I don't understand it. This has a general canned coffee flavor to it, with some small traces of caramel. There is another flavor that people tend to overdo it with. With a confection that is pretty much just burned sugar, less is usually more. I want hints of it, not a sore jaw from chewing a hunk of it for hours. Luckily there is no trace of the energy drink flavor in here. The idea of it mixed with coffee, is pretty wretched, and Monster seems aware of that, so they keep them separate.
Overall I found myself enjoying this way more than I had anticipated. It's nothing terribly special, but I had overall low expectations and every single one of them were surpassed. Aim low and you'll never miss the mark.
- Rating
- Categories
- Coffee and Energy Drink
- Company
- Monster — Website — @MonsterEnergy
- Country
- United States
- Sweetener
- Sugar
- Author
- Jason Draper on 3/20/16, 2:13 PM
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Gevalia Iced Coffee with Almond Milk Mocha
When Editor Dan and Jay and I get together, we eat food. We love the stuff. It's like we need it to live. When we've got a couple more minutes than normal, we do what other extremely attractive and confident men do which is go to Big Lots.
Why wouldn't I like a nice, tall mocha drink? You're right. I wouldn't not like it. Except, of course, when it tastes like this.
I don't think it's the almond milk because I've had that but something in this drink gets stuck to my tongue and tastes bad and tastes bad for an extended amount of time. My live-in girlfriend likes it so I'll try to think of the good parts. It does have a good mocha taste. It's nice and smooth. Badness? It's just got some sort of...presence that sits on your tongue like you on the couch after the boss was riding you all day. You aren't moving. You don't care what's on TV. You will watch The Bachelor if it comes on. You like watching those girls fight about their completely fabricated lives anyhow. This drink resides for so long that it should have to pay rent or mortgage depending on your current living situation.
I wish this was better. Almonds? Love 'em. Mocha? Love it. This? Naw, bro. Swing and a miss.
Why wouldn't I like a nice, tall mocha drink? You're right. I wouldn't not like it. Except, of course, when it tastes like this.
I don't think it's the almond milk because I've had that but something in this drink gets stuck to my tongue and tastes bad and tastes bad for an extended amount of time. My live-in girlfriend likes it so I'll try to think of the good parts. It does have a good mocha taste. It's nice and smooth. Badness? It's just got some sort of...presence that sits on your tongue like you on the couch after the boss was riding you all day. You aren't moving. You don't care what's on TV. You will watch The Bachelor if it comes on. You like watching those girls fight about their completely fabricated lives anyhow. This drink resides for so long that it should have to pay rent or mortgage depending on your current living situation.
I wish this was better. Almonds? Love 'em. Mocha? Love it. This? Naw, bro. Swing and a miss.
- Rating
- Categories
- Coffee
- Country
- United States
- Sweetener
- Sugar
- Author
- Mike Literman on 1/29/16, 5:51 PM
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Main St. Cafe French Vanilla Iced Latte
At the apparently culturally diverse Main St. Cafe they know that there are different people from different walks of life that like different beverages. Sure there are the people out there that are die hard coffee fans, who only drink it black, but there are also the people out there who aren't really fans of coffee, but they also still want to participate. This beverage is for them. When they call it French Vanilla Iced Latte what they really mean is “This tastes like sweetened vanilla milk with a splash of coffee in it that you can only really notice in the aftertaste.” It's for times when you want to get together with some friends to catch up at the coffee shop, but don't want to be the jerk who doesn't get anything. This way people will think you're participating in coffee culture without dealing with the flavor that you're not a fan of in any great amount.
I personally enjoyed this a great deal, but for a primary category I would list this as milk and not coffee. I wonder what the actual percentages are in here.
I personally enjoyed this a great deal, but for a primary category I would list this as milk and not coffee. I wonder what the actual percentages are in here.
- Rating
- Categories
- Coffee
- Company
- Main St. Cafe — Website
- Country
- United States
- Sweetener
- Sugar
- Author
- Jason Draper on 11/26/15, 2:23 PM
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