Mike Literman - 1759 Reviews

Flavor-wise, this is nice. It's pretty smooth and I personally like the Stevia taste mixed with the coffee extract. It's a welcome bitterness to a sweet and fruity lemonade. What I don't like, and this just me and not at all affecting my rating, is the intense jitters I'm getting from the caffeine. It turns you into a masochist because I'm enjoying the flavor but not the after effects of it. As I said, not affecting the review.

Flavor? Yeah. Chocked full. Nice genuine strawberry flavor with a little sweet and sour from the lemonade. It's actually pretty good and would be really good in itself. I wonder why Stevia is in there at all; probably to cut down on calories. Yeah, that's probably why. I could start a juice company. I'm like a detective. Or an assumptive moron who should keep his mouth shut if he knows what's good for him.

Eek. This is good. Dastardly good. Sure, it defied the simple rule of "fast food" since I waited patiently in my car for five minutes at the window while this was delivered to me, unapologetically. Who cares? That machine man. You've really got to reel it in with that thing. It is the single most multi-tasking piece of equipment in the place and it's down constantly. The entirety of the McCafe is solely reliant on that one machine and it's down all the time. That's neither Nora there.

This drink, though. Jesus. It's fantastic. It's served with an unnecessary amount of whipped cream and chocolate sauce. In hindsight, I wish I would have gone without it because it's already chocolate since it's mocha. I don't need ice cream toppings on a coffee drink. Thank you. Unneeded. It's good, though. It's clearly a coffee with a decent enough amount of chocolate that both are clearly represented. I'm not coffee connoisseur, but it's a good coffee taste. I don't care. I'm sure it's garbage. I don't care. I should. I don't. You win, McDonald's.

Well this sucks.

I've recently reviewed a lot of really good turmeric drinks but this is not one of them. It's spicy. Not spicy "hot spicy" but spicy like "contains a lot of spices" spicy. Spiceful. I tried hard to like this. It's different but it's not fantastic. It gets more punishing with every sip. The more lukewarm it gets, the more thick and gritty it gets, like everything settles into a sandy mess at the bottom at when you let it sit next to you for a half hour, it just settles and gets downright thick and gross. It's now been on my desk for an hour because I cannot finish it. It's almost come full circle and gotten spicy and gritty at the same time. I feel like someone swapped out my drink with something you would order at an Indian restaurant. Ginger turmeric sounds like a great chicken dish. Ginger turmeric is a terrible, terrible drink.

The world of half and half is a populated place and somehow, it's a pretty good place to be. There aren't a lot of bad ones out there. Look, there are bad ones out there but all things considered, it's still a nice place to hang out.

This tea has a little secret, though and that secret is mint. If I may break it down for you for a second here; the tea is fine, just fine. The lemonade is pretty good. Pulpless but good. You can taste that lemon but the mint. Dat mint, tho. It's a really nice change for the generally consistent half and halves out there. Changing it up on us, gents. Now I want to try your other drinks. We'll see what we can do about that.

Rocky road is a pretty great ice cream. Chocolate, marshmallows and nuts. It's kind of the best things combined. This is a liquid version with coffee. Now, in typical Dunkin' Donuts fashion, I saw how it was "made" and was a bit let down. They're not good at keeping the curtain up between the "half coffee; half hot chocolate; mocha" debacle and now the fact that they just arbitrarily squirt flavor into coffee, it's just not full of surprises. Do I need to be surprised? No. Do I want to have the knowledge of where my food comes from and how it's made? Eh, to an extent. I still want to love hot dogs, you know?

Back to rocky road. It was actually pretty good. It would be something that you get once, and then love, and then get like eleven days in a row only to find out that it's clearly awful for you and you've got the jitters like you wouldn't believe and now your feening. Getting one and drinking one I can see how this would avalanche into an intervention. It's sweet, still tastes like coffee, has a good chocolate taste and although you don't get any nuts or marshmallow, it's still a nice treat to pick you up in the middle of a day. Just don't watch them make it because they squeeze all the fun out of everything.

Pineapple and orange together is like a personal trip to the tropics. The Greek yogurt was a good, but different pick. Sure, we now eat it for breakfast but mixed in with a smoothie, it's a little gritty. I can't really pinpoint it. It's not smooth like a regional yogurt. A Mediterranean yogurt makes it a little less smooth. I'm not complaining. I'm reviewing. It was also thinner than a traditional smoothie. It was closer to a Slurpee than a smoothie.

That might be one of the most general, reviews Thirsty Dudes have ever written.

Remember when you were a kid and you would be eating fruit and your mom would say, "Don't eat too much fruit or you'll get diarrhea."? If this bottle doesn't lie, it's got fifty cherries in it. Fifty. Mom, I think that if I ate fifty cherries and didn't get diarrhea then I'm probably fine. I know they're small, but fifty is fifty is fifty. That's a buttload of cherries, bruh.

Does it taste like cherry? You bet'cha. It's actually a really good drink. It's cut with apple juice so it's not like you're drinking fifty compressed, concentrated cherries. No. It's calmed down with apple juice. You can't taste apple juice and it's also worth mentioning that it doesn't taste like cough syrup. It just tastes like you drank cherry juice. It's tart, as advertised, and made me thirsty since it properly puckered my cheeks while drinking.
Mom, you were wrong. I can eat or drink upwards and maybe more cherries without getting a loose stool. Take that "wives tales."

Most orange juices taste the same. Just like Jay said for the apple juice review for Positive Energy, they taste the same. This one is different. It's got caffeine in it, which I don't need honestly, but thanks for putting it in. What's different about it is that it has green coffee bean in it. I have grown to like that stuff. It's in the Bai, which I actually really like. It's apparently chocked full of antioxidants that you've got to be a fool to turn down. It's got a nice, slightly bitter taste that's more a different flavor than an actual "bitter" flavor but it's got a solid orange juice taste to it first which is important.

I wonder if antioxidants are going to be the new antibacterial stuff that people are worried about turning bacteria into super-bacteria with adorable little capes. Our bodies are slowly going to be immune to antioxidants and be filled with whatever antioxidants fight, probably oxidants, whatever they are. It's an endless struggle.

"They can't all be winners" is a perfect phrase for this drink. Based off the other ones that I reviewed, this is at the bottom of the totem pole. Also, I mean no offence to anyone who may find fault in my zero knowledge of totem poles. Are the best guys on top? I mean, I guess he's the most protected but he's also the guy who has to fall the furthest and would receive the most damage from falling. I guess no one wants to be the guy on the bottom because he's kind of an open target. Everyone else is on his shoulders and can't go very fast to defend the weapons that are slicing his innards up. But I digress.

Mixed fruits? Eh, it kind of tastes like a spicy candle. It's slightly plasticy tasting. Sure, it might be good for me but I don't get a lot of cheerful fruitiness out of it. According to the all-knowing label, it's got pineapple, grape and apple juice in it. That is a mixed variety of fruit but the turmeric is strong in this one. It does not taste like a spicy fruit punch but now that I think about it, I don't know if I would have wanted it.

I would be fine skipping this one for the other ones and I do not want to be anywhere near this guy's position wherever it may be on the proverbial totem pole. I feel like there are better roles than that in war.

Dark green tea. Sometimes the title says it all. When it doesn't, it can be co-labeled as a bottle of lies. This is a dark green tea. It's nicely bitter but bold and flavorful. It's unsweetened so all you babies can go cry in the corner like you hit your brother and mom caught you in the act because this is not taking any crap. Green tea isn't for everyone but should be. It's a wonderful drink that is better for you than even the dietest of pops. That's right. Dietest. You know what I mean. Long live Ito En. Long live green tea. Long live Jethro Tull.

Is this cola? I don't think so. Is it sparkling? Yeah. Is it sweet? Kind of. You know what it is? Bitter. Those Italians, they love their bitter drinks. I'm not "America versus Italy-ing” this thing but they love their bitter drinks that we filthy American's love sweet. Does it mean there is more sugar? I can pretty safely say that is the case. Is this good, though? Hey, that's the million dollar question, right? Well, aside from the fact that I expected this to be sweet, it's not bad I guess. Reading the word "traditional" means that it's pretty assimilated to people's taste buds and it also means that the people who enjoy this have been enjoying it for years and don't want anyone messing around with their things.

So, back to the question at hand; is this good? It's not for me. It's probably going to break people's hearts to hear that. A global apology to those that love this drink. I just can't get over it. I need some sugar on my teeth. I know it's not a sweet drink but the flavor just isn't for me.

"Here. Come try this," my boss says to me. Since I am rarely on the other side of that statement, I had no choice but to accept the request. I thought it was going to be a bad invitation but it was actually a "Here. Come try this. It's good." not "Here. Come try this. It's gross." which is the route I enjoy taking.

Did it taste like smores? Yes, sir or ma'am. Well, I should say that it tasted like the ingredients of smores. Think of a deconstructed smore. You initially get the coffee from the Frappuccino itself followed by a split second of chocolate, then a lot of marshmallow and then some graham cracker. They're all there but at different times. It's fine by me. It was a nice jolt of flavor to wake up my day and feed my recent childish addiction to smores. Never lose your inner child. Smores are a gift and a treat and a treasure.

Ahh tea: The drink of the gods. Sure, some people might say that it's wine but they are wrong and simultaneously dumb. Tea is the drink of the gods. It comes from the earth and goes back in. Cycles. It's all about cycles.

This tea is not like black tea and it's not like green tea. There is a certain maturity to Oolong tea that you don't get with a basic black or a green. It somehow tastes aged or weathered or something. This tea in particular is good. You know, Ito En knows what's up. They really nail it on their unsweetened teas. When Thirsty Dudes is inevitably bought out by Rupert Murdoch, I will spend the $45 that Jay and I have split from the $90 that he offered us that we idiotically accepted with no counter offer on iced tea. It's the only just thing to do. This tea though, man. It's good. It's a dark flavor that can only be acquired by way of trial and error. It's good. Rupert, buddy, we're waiting for your check and if you tell us "it's in the mail...well, we'll probably believe you."

In my sick position, I think I need to sit back and evaluate the amount of citrus I have coming in and going out of my system. I've been really good this winter and now that it's coming to a close, I think that in the change of seasons, I seem to have contracted a bit of a cold. What better way to combat it than with a barrage of EmergenC, honey, green tea and other stuff. I think that this is doing a pretty good job. It's citric and tastes primarily of pineapple. It got a picture of a coconut, grapes, oranges and pineapple on the front although none of them are credited on the back of the bottle. That's strange. I'll keep that in the back of my mind for another time.

This is good, though. I enjoy the taste of it and I think that it might have a base of coconut water that is delightfully covered up by said taste. It's certainly citric but nothing specific. That rhymes. Hey Danny Brown, use that on your next record. "Citric" and "specific." Do with it what you want. Just come out with another record. I'm so anxious.

This is good, though. I enjoy the taste of it and I think that it might have a base of coconut water that is delightfully covered up by said taste. It's certainly citric but nothing specific. That rhymes. Hey Danny Brown. Use that on your next record. "Citric" and "specific." Do with it what you want. Just come out with another record. I'm so anxious.

H10O Water. "Loads of vitamins. Tiny bit of calories. Gallons of diet taste." Not the best tagline, I know. It tells more truth than "No Sugar. No Carbs." Tons of things fit under that criteria. At least with mine you know what you're getting into. Also, I and I alone are splitting hairs, "citrus sport" sounds like the color of a mid-tier sports car. The Hyundai Veloster should change it's color "Vitamin C" and exchange it with "Citrus Sport." I would think the same thing. I would drive the heck out of it either way, but it seems like it's more fitting for an automobile than water.

To the drink itself, it's honestly not that bad. It's diety as all getup but it's not undrinkable. It comes in bursts. In the beginning you get a nice, soft sense of citrus. I don't know any fruit that tastes like this but if it was a real fruit, I think that I would eat it. Once the fruit flavor has run its course, that's when you take a sharp left into Dietburg USA. We'll take a trip there but at the end of a day like today, I would much rather take a trip to Taco Town. It's a diet "water" drink. It could be worse. I think that it's on part if not slightly worse than their sparkling equivalent.

What a cool lemonade. I bet you could give this to some dumb kid and he wouldn't know what is different. Man, kids are so dumb. You could probably put anything in front of a kid and as long as it's not in between their zit covered face and phone with an inevitably broken screen and they would drink it.

This is lemonade with a nice, strong turmeric taste and a little kick. You can taste everything in here down to the final ingredient, your favorite and mine, ginger. Alright, maybe it's not your favorite, but it's good. It also goes down smooth regardless of all of the otherwise foreign ingredients. It might not be popular here in the States but unless it's pizza or bacon flavored, us idiots wouldn't know a good thing if it slapped them across their fat stomach.

Hey kid! Take your headphones off in the car with your parents. Let me in on a little secret; they don't like it.

I've drank a lot of tea. I drink it all day. I could tell the difference between a black and a green all day. I think I could probably tell the distinguish a rooibos tea, too. Oolong, though. I could easily get this confused with a green tea. It's bitter, light Maybe that's the difference. Oolong might be lighter than green tea. It's really good and I wish that it was a gallon larger. I bet this is small for a reason, like people aren't supposed to handle that much caffeine or something. It's good though. Size aside, this is wonderful. I wish I had time to ponder and sit and mull it over but there are thousands of lines of code to write. Maybe some other time, Ito En. You will not be punished for my hectic, busy life. I wish I could enjoy you. This sounds like an awful breakup. It's not you, it's me. Go. Be with someone who can appreciate you.

Mocha is as close to coffee as I can get. You can call me what you want but I'll say it myself; I'm a weakling. I'm a shell of a man. I can't handle it. Your eighty year old grandma is more of a man than me. Cool. Now that that's out of the way, this is good. It's not only good but it's diet and good. Strange, right? It is, as advertised, sweet and creamy and pretty rich as well.

I think that it's getting pretty easy to eat and drink well. This is probably half the calories that a non-diet version would be and only tastes mildly more diet. We're getting there. Disguising diet stuff. That's the future. Not space. Not time travel. Things that are diet but don't taste diet. Screw you moon mining.

Unlike Jay, I eat meat. That being said, if I can eat an animal that was treated fairly before he was, let's face it, murdered, that's better. Morrissey, while wildly militant about it, is right in that respect. He's right about a lot. He's Morrissey. This milk is advertised as being produced humanly and who can't appreciate that? Sure, there are probably some people out there talking about how they don't care how the animals are being treated as long as they have a hamburger on their plate at the end of a day.

Does this chocolate milk taste happier? Not really. I'm not saying that it tastes sadder. If anything, it tastes thicker. It's creamy chocolate milk, more so than anything you make at home and probably thicker than a Nesquik. Yes, there is sucralose in it and yes you can taste it but it doesn't come off as a super diet chocolate milk. It's better for you in terms of calories, protein and calcium than "regular chocolate milk." You wouldn't guess it because it's pretty rich and if you didn't know better, tastes like it is not at all better for you than "the other guys" chocolate milk.


Our buddy Marvo over The Impulsive Buy reviewed this drink, too which reminded me that I had it in my queue. Now, all thanks to him, I really want another glass of it. You've done it again, Marvo.

To be a woman is rough. If this is any indication of what motherhood is like, it sucks. I've got a kid and child rearing also is very difficult and, at times, sucks. If I knew that the action of carrying a baby tastes like a lemon V8, then I might propose adoption to my increasingly unfortunate "baby mama."

This is a lemon red tea. There is raspberry in it but the lemon is real lemony and overwhelming. If you made yourself a nice, cool glass of red tea and then took one of those little bottles of lemon juice and just went haywire and squirted an excessive amount in it, you would have this. I, with every sip, do not know what's happening in here. It's just so overwhelmingly lemon flavored that it distracts from any other flavor.

Maybe, as a man, I am missing the point that...I don't know, lemons are really good for pregnant women? As a man, who is not pregnant at this current point in time, this is not for me.