United States - 4098 Reviews

My stars. As you may or may not know, I am in Brooklyn. I have wanted to try Brooklyn Soda Works but it's not available in Buffalo and it's not really ship friendly. Well you can't duck me for long because I came to you and you can't escape your own home.

I went to a bar in the middle of the day filled with day drinking women with their kids and ordered a root beer. Upon delivery, I made my friend drink it first because it couldn't look more like beer. Honestly, it could and might play as beer's stunt double in Spike Lee films.

This root beer was fantastic. It was almost like a sarsaparilla because it was so sweet but every sip was a treat. It was a dark flavor that was just super bold and just a treat.

Now this isn't something that we would normally review but there are enough people in the Brooklyn/Manhattan area and enough distribution centers that people can enjoy this. Please, enjoy this. Please.

Mangos are Jay's favorite fruit. Cilantro is Jay's least favorite herb. Together this makes for a drink that he would never touch. For that reason and the fact that you can't get this in Buffalo, I bought this and am reviewing it for you now.

This is very seltzer-y. Not a word? I do not care. It's got that taste I'm not super psyched about but the cilantro cuts through and redeems this drink. When you burp, you get a little mango, but not much. If you expected mango and wanted mango, you might be a little disappointed. If you like cilantro, you have slim pickings when it comes to drinks so you've got no choice but to be excited to have found this.

What's the perfect drink while you're holed up in your house during a snowstorm? If you said hot chocolate you are wrong. Today my vote goes for this iced tea. It's already warm inside my house so I needed something cool and refreshing that reminds me that spring is only a couple months away.

I'm pretty sure this is my first green tea/coconut half and half and I really hope it's not my last. It's really good and crisp and refreshing and probably a bunch of other positive adjectives.

Day one in Brooklyn was a success. My flight was on time. I didn't get hassled at the gate. I took the right subway from the airport. I Google Map'd it successfully to my destination. I handled it like a pro. We went to dinner and got a fantastic pizza and then went to get dessert. They didn't have the cookies we were looking for so we got a berry pie, which was awesome. While we were in the store, I checked for drinks and there were a lot of them. I settled on this one, which might be my most expensive drink I have ever purchased to date at $7. My buddy put it into perspective by saying that is what regular people spend on drinks every time they drink so it all evened out.

When we got home, we talked about what we've been up to, ate pie, and I drank this and it was pretty fantastic. It was slightly spicy with the cayenne pepper and the lemon was like really sour lemonade so together it was a wonderful assault on my mouth. The agave…€¦whatever. It might have smoothed everything out and left less of a bite and perhaps less calories than with, say, cane sugar. I have no complaints. This drink was great, though, and I'm happy to have finally found one to review.

Tomorrow we have all sorts of activities planned so there should be more reviews of probably expensive city drinks. I said that like I live in Iowa on some farm and this is my first time in an urban environment.

I think someone once told me that is life gives you lemons, make lemonade. That's all well and good, but what happens when life gives you limes? Oh that's right, you make guacamole and mojitos. The problem is that I am plum out of avocados and mint, so there goes that plan. I suppose my back up plan could be to make some limeade. Is limeade the rarest of all ades? No, I think that award would go to Citron's guava or papaya ades.

For those of you who are only familiar with lemonade, this may be a bit of a disappointment. It doesn't make your cheeks pinch in that sour way that great lemonade does. It's basically watered down limejuice, but that is a good thing. Have you ever tried drinking straight limejuice? I do not suggest it unless you want to look like this guy.

This is tame and mild and only slightly sweetened (12g of sugar for an ade is not very common). I could have gone for a bit more lime, as I do love an intense ade, but this would do in a pinch.

Here we are again. Dr. B's. I don't taste pomegranate and I don't taste acai. I like pomegranate but I dislike acai so that is a push. The Xylitol is running rambunctious through this drink and overwhelms even the worst flavor (acai) and is too bad because the thought of a pomegranate red tea that is naturally sweetened, low calorie, even with that turd acai is enticing to me. Cut the sugar in half. Xylitol just masks everything with its uber-sweetness and doesn't allow everyone to shine and do their thing.

All the ingredients in here are fine but the levels in which they exist is incorrect. It's as simple as that. Do you want to taste what fruity Xylitol tastes like? Here's your drink.

I want a physical version of the hybrid fruit that is on this label. The top of a pineapple, the bottom of an orange, and the middle is just gigantic sweet, sweet strawberry parts. Science has to have come along far enough that this could be engineered in a lab somewhere. I don't even care that it wouldn't be natural, because it would be amazing. I do suppose they would have to toughen up the skin on the strawberry, so that it wouldn't get mashed, but I'm willing to have to peel my strawberry middle. Science if you create this for me I will owe you one hell of a solid.

Since this has yet to be created by gloriously evil scientists in a lab, Dole did the next best thing and combined the three juices. Seriously, why has this not been done before? You see pineapples and oranges mingling together, but it's rare that you see them in the company of a strawberry, unless it's in some sort of fruit salad. I understand that pineapples and oranges are both citrus/tropical fruits, so they obviously go well together, but think outside of the box people. Just because strawberries are grown in the northeast, doesn't mean they won't pair nicely with some citrus fruit, which it does in a great way.

There is no sugar added in this juice. It's just fruit doing all the work, the way life should be. The sweetness of the strawberries helps to keep the acidity of the pineapple and oranges in check. It also gives it that little push it needs to make it stand out over other juices in the cooler of my grocery store.

Until science picks up the slack and makes me my Frankenstein fruit, I'll just have to keep drinking this juice.

Deep in the Alaskan wilderness lies a group of people exiled from civilization. They were misunderstood and should have never been banished like they were, in the middle of the night with pitchforks, flaming sticks, and arrows, like modern day Frankenstein monsters. They are occasionally air dropped supplies so that they can live. The people that put them there aren't bad people, just complete idiots because the people that they sent away were the smartest people in each of the towns. When they opened their mouths, genius came out and the townspeople didn't understand or felt threatened. Now there is a small town that is run by geniuses and has things that larger towns don't have like perpetual motion power, no government, friendly robots, fair trade, and a research and development facility that puts the drug companies to shame. Inside this facility they have a type of grape that is indigenous to only there and they dubbed it the "arctic grape." It is a marvel of science that only such smart people could create. Inside and unlike in regular grapes, there are vitamins, minerals, and electrolytes that could only previously be in sugary sports drinks. They use it in a juice that they drink all the time. It's a light purple color and tastes great. It doesn't have and calories so they can all stay as fit as they always were. It tastes a bit between a candy grape and a "real" grape and doesn't taste like a diet drink, which is a nice middle ground for both the adults and children at the town.

There is little to no communication between the people that sent them away and the townspeople so they aren't aware of such technological advances. They like it that way because it's their secret way of getting back at them. They live far better, richer lives among their own kind than with the likes of those dumb dummies.

There may come a time in your life when you get a call that says the plan in on, and to be ready by 2am. Since you know this is going to be an all night drive, with a full day following you decide you should get some sleep. It's too early for you to naturally fall asleep, so you grab a can of Purp Lean and let it do its work. I drank the can that tasted exactly like your average grape soda around 10pm. It had expected a little bit of a different flavor to it, like most relaxation drink have, but the fake grape flavor covered it up nicely. About 20 minutes later I went to bed, and was out in less than 10minutes, which is unheard of for my sleep schedule. I was doing fine getting a couple of hours of sleep in before it was time to hit the road, suddenly I was disturbed by a confusing sensation. It took me several moments to realize that my cat had nestled in to go to sleep on my head. She's never done anything like this before, so I can only assume the folks at Lean set this up to prove to me how well their product works because I didn't even get annoyed. I didn't even get her to move. I just calmly went back to sleep.

At 1:45 my alarm went off, and I got dressed and jumped in my car to head off to Punxutawney, PA to see Groundhog Phil emerge to predict the end of winter. Unfortunately after an hour and a half into the drive we realized that with the bad weather would not permit us to get to our destination in time to see Phil emerge. Total bummer. Home we went, and I got the rest of the sleep I didn't expect, so it wasn't all a loss.

Fitness Edge knows that when it comes to protein drinks it is important to have flavors that pair well with cream. When choosing a flavored protein drink first ask yourself could I see myself eating this fruit or whatever with whipped cream on top. If the answer is no, quickly run away. There are very few things worse then dairy where it should not belong.

Well that is not really a good rule, because dairy and orange juice sounds like hell, but creamsicles are magical. The flavors just work together in soda form and they work together in this drink. It's still heavy on the whey protein, so it's a bit more dairy flavored than I would like, but it's easy enough to drink. It's thick, which is to be expected, but it's not as chalky as some protein drinks are. It's not bad, and who couldn't use a little bit of help with muscle recovery after working down at the docks all day? I have no idea why I am assuming you work on the docks. Oh wait, it's because you're wearing that little winter hat, that just barely covers the top of your head and comes nowhere near covering your ears.

Thirsty Dudes have a friend called "The Hammer." The Hammer is a great man who has affection for good, high quality chocolate. "Do you want to try a square?" he says to me. I never deny. Why? It's chocolate, number one, but it's always and definitely good chocolate because he only buys the good stuff. If he were with me right now, at my desk at work, I would have him drink this with me. This is chocolate milk for adults. It's bitterer than chocolate milk and has a natural taste to it. It's more woody and chalky than you would expect a generic chocolate milk to be so for that reason, you might not like it. I like it. The mint version is a bit more "entry level" if you ask me, but I think this one is good, too. The qualities of a good chocolate aren't always what make a good chocolate drink, though. Like I said, it's good, but it is going to be a bit more bitter than people might like. Still sweet but not as creamy as the kids would like. Hence chocolate milk for adults.

Who doesn't want to be fit? I'm not saying you have to go the whole nine yards, juice up, and become completely muscle bound, just toned at least. I do. I feel like I used to be due to my incredible metabolism but then the years started catching up to me and I had to be a bit more conscience about what I eat and drink. I've never gone crazy with food, which is why I'm not four hundred pounds, but I could have definitely done better with my food choices in my life.

In order to become more fit, I have taken up bike riding, which I have actually scaled down since having no time to casually ride my bike with a kid. That helped for a little bit. Now it's down to things like eating right since I don't really have time to go to the gym. Either that or I'm lazy and making excuses. If I were to go to the gym, I know that I would traditionally bring Gatorade but with all the other fitness drinks I've had since doing Thirsty Dudes that might not be the go-to anymore. This is another one that should be on your radar. It's diet, yes. It's sweetened with sucralose, but it's not poison like you might think. The flavor is actually pretty light, which you can control with how much you squeeze in to your glass but I followed directions and it was lighter than I expected. It's zero calories, though, and has everything that's going to energize, hydrate, and electrolyte you to get to your target weight. The flavor is that of a berry, whether it be a blueberry, you know, because it's blue, or a black berry or any nondescript berry. It could be raspberry, which it could be in hindsight because of its "blue" color. You know how that is the only blue food that exists in drink form. Whatever flavor it is, it's not bad and with no calories you could drink it all day, in or out of the gym. I've seriously got to think about something fitness related before my body just rejects what little I do to it for payback.

Sick babies mean a lot of things. Number one is that you spend your days dealing with a kid who can't exactly express their discomfort. Number two through forty-five is that you lose a lot of sleep. Finally getting my little buddy to school was fantastic because I can work, feel like I've contributed something to society, and put me one step closer to knowing that we will both not be awakened by coughing, sniffing, and bi-hourly whining.

I found this little number on the limited line and got it. I was reluctant as I am not a coffee person but the combination of hazelnut and mocha can only mean one thing; Nutella, which I love. Oh, I know it's terrible for you, but who cares. Smoking is probably worse for you than a Nutella sandwich, or at least I'd like to think that it is. I was luckily correct and this guy was great. It was more like a Nutella hot chocolate with a little coffee in it. I got it in a small, rather incognito cup but there was some sort of chocolate whipped cream that you couldn't see which cooled it down, cut down on the coffee, and made it smoother so I could actually drink it. I thought it was good and although I couldn't do anything larger than a small, I wouldn't advise not getting something larger. I don't drink a lot of drink so I could do this little, ten-ish ounce guy without feeling the need to share it.

It's not true coffee, I know. I would never say that it is. It's a bastardization of a latte, too and, once again I'm not claiming that I'm an expert. This is one step away from being some garbage powder drink you make at a truck stop but it's something that will make you remember that truck stop for reasons other than the glory hole that was in the bathroom.

Every time I looked at this drink I saw snakes. Confused? Let me explain. Remember in Pee Wee's Big Adventure when the pet store is burning and Pee Wee keeps going in to save the pets, but each time he shivers as he passes the aquarium of snakes, because he knows that eventually he's going to have to reach in and save those snakes? Well this drink is like the contents of that aquarium.

Pears and I are not on the best of terms. When I was growing up the old lady who lived next door had two pear trees in her backyard that she never took care of. Come fall her backyard would be full of the stench of rotting pears that littered the lawn, which brought a bunch of bees and other bugs along with it. This eventually over spilled into my backyard. Bees and decay are not a fun combination. Ever since then I have this thing about pears that I can't shake. Even though we have absolutely loved every other flavor of the Sonoma Sparkler line it has taken me five months to finally drink this soda because of the cursed pear.

I was a fool. This sparkling juice is better than anyone could have ever expected. Yes, this would surprise even pear enthusiasts. The way the pears mix in with the apples is spectacular. They become a Ying and Yang of fruit juices. Neither overpowers the other. They just live in harmony. With no sweeteners added this is nothing but carbonation and juice, which makes it an unbeatable healthy force.

I have faced my fears. I came out with an armful of snakes and I didn't scream and pass out like that baby Pee Wee. In fact, I'm ready to head back in to save some more.

If you're looking for bold flavors, then look elsewhere. If you're looking for something mild with some health benefits that will help curb your hunger then here you go. It has a light citrus flavor that if you concentrate enough does in fact taste kind of like mangos and tangerines.

I'd like to hire Dustin Hoffman's character from Rainman to count how many chia seeds are actually in this drink. I'm guessing at least three thousand, but it's hard to tell. I'd say this is 55% liquid and 45% seed. You get hundreds of seeds in your mouth with every sip, but if you try to chew them, they just slip right around your teeth. It's a fun little game.

I'm in the process of dealing with what I can only describe as week-long carsickness that other people are telling me is vertigo. Whatever it is, it sucks and is unwelcome in my head. I've got constant spinning and slight nausea, which is enough to make me just sick enough in the head and stomach that my days totally suck. In order to combat this, I decided to recruit good old ginger ale to help me. Is it helping? No, unfortunately not.

For a ginger ale, this is as average as they come. "It's a mixer." you are wishing you could tell me but in reality, it's a drink all to itself and it is average. It's sweet and tastes like ginger ale. Ever since I've found ginger ale that has an essence of actual ginger, everything else is "just" ginger ale. Basic ginger ale is becoming increasingly difficult to review, as like orange juice, it really tastes the same.

I don't know what I'm going to do about this barrage of nausea, as it's exhausting. This ginger ale isn't helping. Sleep isn't helping. I might just have to taco it out. Honestly, it couldn't hurt at this point and sounds like the best treatment at this juncture.

First there was 8 Minute Abs. Then the great 7 Minute Abs was thought of by a lonely hitchhiker. That self same hitchhiker then assured us that 6 Minute Abs could never exist, due to science. Years later the world is bombarded with 5-Hour Energy shots. They always seemed a bit scary to me. Time shouldn't be able to be so concentrated into a little bottle. Finally everything has come together in one plastic container of Zum XR. The contents of this bottle will slowly release both caffeine and electrolytes over a 5 hour period. Think of how many sets of 7 Minute Abs you could do in that time. The caffeine will keep you going and the electrolytes will keep you hydrated. It's a win-win situation and by my calculations you'll have a month and a half's worth of ab workouts in one afternoon. Who's going to argue that science?

The functionality of this drink is right on the money. I drank one before I went to the gym and I ended up working out longer, and didn't feel as worn out by the end. I also didn't feel jittery at all. The problem is in the science of the flavor. It's not grosssauce, but it does taste like watered down mandarin orange juice, with a bit of functionality weirdness in the aftertaste. It's not something I would drink for the flavor, but it's not bad compared to other poison tasting drinks that promise a somewhat similar functionality.

On another note, it says it shake the bottle to “unleash” the power of the energy beads that are in it (aka the cupcake sprinklesque tiny balls that are on the bottom). No matter how much I shook it I couldn't get them to exist in the bottle, except at the bottom. By the time I got to the end of the drink I got a mouthful of the little guys and I could see how that could be a turn off for some people. So keep that in mind.

Have you ever heard the Patton Oswalt bit he does about an open mic he hosted in Toronto? Well it is relevant to this review since the guy he talks about in the bit is named Dr. Pepper. You know what, do yourself a favor and listen to/watch the bit:



Sadly this can of Diet Dr. Pepper isn't as funny as that. It's not as bad as most diet sodas, but it's also not as good as most other varieties of Dr. Pepper. At least we got to hear a funny bit from Patton Oswalt right?

UGH! That is what I exclaimed when I first took a sip of this. I have enjoyed all the other Monster Rehab drinks, but this is borderline undrinkable. It tastes like someone was potting a plant next to it and accidentally got some of the soil inside. They tried to filter all the soil out, but the taste was still there and they just hoped no one would notice.

Well I noticed and it sucks. I hate wasting drinks but I can't even take a third sip.

Al Capone. You and your cronies have done a wonderful thing here. You have broken the correct legs to get to this diet root beer. All of those threats, violin cases filled with Tommy guns, guitar cases filled with machine guns, briefcases filled with handguns have allowed you to create one of the best diet root beers I have ever had. The slight taste of diet in this is quickly smoothed over with a nice root beer taste complete with vanilla. This is better than some regular root beers I have had and that is saying a lot.

I trust that with this review, we will be in your good graces so when I pass your men on the street, which, if I may be so frank, are blatant since normally I don't see a gaggle of men in pinstriped suits, they will give me a nod and be on their way. I will leave you to your business of smuggling rum into places, underground fighting rings, and other general cahoots that you and your men perform. I wish you the best of luck in your future endeavors. If I may be of any service, please let me know. Know in advance, I do have my limits. I might not be the best man for things like killing, poisoning, slashing tires, bomb installation, or anything in the "almost legal" category. If you want me to be a wheelman, I would love to do that, though.