High Fructose Corn Syrup - 485 Reviews

Gene you've done a great job here with this white grape juice. It has a great flavor and nice carbonation. Wait…€¦what? It's not carbonated? I guess it's just that good that my mind somehow imagined the bubbles. Let me take another sip. You're right it's not. Why on Earth did I think it was?

Now Gene this is great but as you know us here at Sangaria are trying to take the company in a “green” direction. You know, reduce our waste and all. We've been getting in a lot of trouble with the government as of late. Is there anything you can think of to help us out? Wait you want us to put the remainders of the grapes in the drink? That's just plain weird Gene. Who would want to drink that? Okay find I'll try it. This actually isn't too bad. My only complaint is that the grapes could be peeled. You have a machine that will do that? Where do you get those wonderful toys? This is going to be perfect. It's a wonderful tasting white grape juice with whole peeled grapes thrown in to make drinking fun again. Kids are going to have a hay day and you Gene are going to have an awesome compost pile with all of those grape peels. I told you we had to get rid of waste, so now you have to take them home. Enjoy.

This is pretty bad. There's no beating around the bush. If you like it, awesome, but if you're looking for good limeade, you're not going to find it here. There is a sweet sting that almost feels carbonated followed by a decent lime taste. It's hard to get past the sting and it took me by surprise the first time I drank it. I don't know why it's there.

I don't have a great review and you know what, they don't have to be gems, but I'm not going to waste my time writing some poetic tale of a girl riding her bike crashing into a lime tree and spilling the seltzer water all over all the limes that spilled on the ground. I just won't do it. Sure she decided that she would gather up the limes and take them home so that the townspeople won't get mad that she knocked some of their lime supply off the tree, but you don't need to know that because I'm not going to make up another story.

Dear Readers,
I am afraid that Thirsty Dudes has ruined me. I used to drink cheap syrupy iced teas all the darn time, and I loved it. Now that I've been drinking so much quality teas and the unsweetened variety has become such a part of me these teas are a little hard to get down. They don't taste like real tea in any way. I feel like I'm drinking sugar water with heavy flavoring in it. It has that fake peach flavoring, which I can no longer get down with. This claims to be 100% natural yet it contains no juice and is sweetened with corn syrup. I think JB's is taking a loose interpretation of the word natural.

All of those complaints aside, I drank this while I was dripping with sweat, printing shirts in a million degree room, and I will admit it quenched my thirst. Then again a tall cool glass of horse urine may have refreshed me at that moment.

I really don't understand why Faygo hasn't embraced Insane Clown Posse yet. Sure clowns can be scary and they don't know how magnets work and want to live on a place called "Juggalo Island". Despite all those (and may more) negative traits, they have bought millions of dollars of Faygo over the past 10 years. One would presume that Faygo doesn't want to associate with them because they have an image to uphold. I wouldn't want to associate myself with a music group that promotes sketchy stuff either.

But what image does Faygo have to uphold? It is a ghetto pop! The only place i've ever seen it for sale is those corner stores that have expired Spaghetti-O's, socks, and Rap Snacks. It's the pop you buy because it's cheaper than Pepsi. If Faygo started putting ICP on bottles tomorrow, I highly doubt some middle age mom is going to stop buying it from the corner store for her snot-nosed kids. It's still going to be the cheapest pop you can buy. This cola is still going to be a 3rd rate cola. It tastes really syrupy and bland. If anything, it will probably increase their sales because even more juggalos will buy it. It would be one of the best decisions they ever made to embrace the MCL (much clown love) and make a line of ICP flavors.

When I was asked by Derek to do a guest review for Thirsty Dudes, I was totally excited, but incredibly overwhelmed. All of my favorite drinks had already been reviewed, and trying to find a new drink that hadn't been done before was next to impossible. So finally my thoughts turned to drinks I absolutely LOATHE; one shining beacon of disgust stood out among the rest, and when I searched for it on this site, I found that it had yet to be reviewed, and so I give you BIG RED.



My history with BIG RED is not particularly noteworthy: my friends and I saw it in a supermarket in Albuquerque, NM when we were in high school, and bought a six pack because we thought it would be awesome. We all took turns doing spit-takes in the parking lot of the Albertson's we bought it from, declaring that the only way this soda could possibly make any money is from people buying it to see if it's really as bad as they remembered it being (the answer in this scenario would always be an emphatic YES). And then it was written off forever, and if there was ever a discussion about disgusting beverages I would relate my story about BIG RED and get a laugh or two, but since I've moved to the east coast, there are less and less people who have heard of or tried this soda, because it's mostly a southern "delicacy". As such, this bottle I hold in my hands was shipped to me by my dear friend Claire Van, from Austin Texas.

I was totally prepared to trash this soda. I was sure that my memory served me well, and this would be a 1 star review, but as I fearfully opened the bottle and took my first sip, I was surprised to find that I didn't actually HATE the taste, which is exactly like Bazooka Joe bubblegum (the soda itself is supposed to be a red cream soda). It's too sweet for me, but as novelty, what the hell, it's not the worst thing out there, and certainly not as bad as I remembered it being. That is, until you get to the aftertaste, which is overpoweringly chemical, and brings back the distinct memory of getting fluoride treatment in elementary school. I took the bottle outside and let some of my neighbors take a sip: my neighbor Evan was super excited because he had grown up in Texas, and thus BIG RED is a huge source of nostalgia for him, Peter thought it was pretty good, Kate seemed unimpressed, and Maris flat out hated it. I finished the rest of the bottle in their company on the front stoop, and about halfway through began to feel like the taste was starting to overstay its welcome. Indeed, a whole bottle of BIG RED is far too much for me, and I started to remember what it was that I initially disliked about the soda so many years ago: it's just not enjoyable to drink. It's taste, while not being outright offensive, is certainly too overbearing to be a regular addition to my liquid diet, and luckily, since I had to have it imported, I won't see it in the soda aisle and be tempted to buy it just to see if it really is as bad as I remember it being.

Skeleteens were way ahead of their time in the soda timeline. They made weird and unusual sodas while the rest of the world was content with the classics. On top of that they were also way ahead of the game in terms of energy drinks. They played a large role in my beverage consumption as a teenager and they will always have a place in my heart. I'm so glad that Real Soda has taken over the drink line and it has seen the light of day again.

I love this drink, but my question is why does it taste nothing like it's purple counterpart? The purple Love Potion is grape flavored with a burn to it. This is more of a berry flavor with the slightest memory of a burn. It actually has a candied flavor with a kick to it. I don't really know how to explain it. It tastes like it should burn your throat, but it doesn't. It's definitely a unique flavor.

As with most of the Skeleteens' sodas I could do without all of the wacky sayings on the label, but I know that was part of the charm of these drinks when I was 15.

You know who loved pina coladas? The Indians. Native Americans. Sorry. You think Arizona just arbitrarily put an Indian on the bottle? They had to earn it. For hundreds of years, Native Americans would ride on horseback from New Mexico to Puerto Rico in order to get authentic pina coladas. The horses never liked riding on the boats so often times they would have to let people in Cancun borrow their horses until they got back. Often times, they would come back and there would be ponies since they were gone enjoying pina coladas for so long. Once in Puerto Rico, they would order coconut after coconut filled with the milk as well as ground up pineapples and the finest rum that not a lot of money could by. They would fill their backsacks with coconuts right off the tree and pineapples off whatever pineapples come off of. I assume trees as well.

When the Native Americans heard that Arizona was making pina colada, they jumped on their horsies and rode to Arizona, only to find out that Arizona is actually based out of Upstate New York. They decided to just call them using their cellular phones and thank them. Arizona was so happy that the Indians liked their drink that they decided to take Stacy Keach off and replace it with the Indian leader at the time.

What the Indians liked about the Arizona is not only that it came in a resealable container, but that it used the finest coconuts like they got from Puerto Rico. The pineapple to coconut ratio was spot on and it was so well sweetened that it didn't need rum. They say that it gets to be a little too much for one person so they typically split it with their friends.

They thought that Arizona did such a nice job that they put one of their horses on a plane and shipped it to New York where Arizona built a nice employee ranch where they can go during lunch breaks and ride it and feed it out of their hands.

The name of this company, Rip It, would be perfect for a professional wrestler to promote it. I can picture Ultimate Warrior or Macho Man Randy Savage (RIP) in the 90's getting pumped about this on a TV commercial between Saturday morning cartoons.

"When I'm in the ring, there's only one drink that gets me going. RIP IT! (They scream as they rip a telephone book in half, then a dictionary, then a picture of their wrestling rival)" It could have been a huge hit.

I don't think I've had a pomegranate flavored energy drink before. It's one of my favorite fruits so I was really excited to find this little can. It has a good pomegranate flavor that is nice and tart. The usual acidic energy drink taste is very minimal, which lets the fruit flavor shine. I'm half way through this little can and already have a jolt of energy. I think that means it's working.

I have way too many drinks in my cupboard. All three of us do. I could easily drink 2 different things a day for a month and not run out. It's kind of a problem. Luckily my new house has a big cabinet outside of my bedroom that none of my housemates mind if I fill it with drinks.

Where I'm getting with this is that I told myself I wasn't going to buy and new drinks until I put a significant dent in my back-stock. I went to Wegmans with my friend Jess Pizza (yes, her real last name is Pizza) tonight because I was bored and needed to get toilet paper. As we were about to pay for our goods, I saw this bottle of lemonade by the register. My thirst got the better of me and I bought it. In turn, Jess picked up a bottle of Turkey Hill's Orange Tea. I almost changed my mind because I do love their orange tea, but stuck with the lemonade.

Did i make the right choice? Yes and no. This definitely did the job of quenching my thirst. Unfortunately, it tasted a little watered down. It also didn't have much of a sour bite to it. I'd drink it again, but next time I'll be grabbing the bottle of orange tea.

Until today, it had been years since I had Cherry Coke. I had nothing against it. I just never desired to buy one. But yesterday I was craving Pepsi but made myself buy this because we hadn't reviewed it yet. Seriously, if I drank a different drink every time I've had a normal Pepsi in the past year, I'd have a LOT more reviews.

This was better than I expected it to me. Obviously it's not the fanciest cola, but it has a really nice cherry taste. It makes sense that this is a staple in the Coca-Cola line because the cola and cherry flavors go really well together. Here's to another omnipresent soda that I can get behind.

There is a new Asian market not too far from my house. I have never been there because when Jay and I went, the joint was closed. I don't know why. It was like 8 o'clock on a Tuesday. I have never seen this stuff anywhere else so it leads me to believe that it's like another world in there, an Asian world.

I could never make it in any Asian countries because I would work all day training bonsai, not making a lot of money but enjoying every second of my life only to spend all my money on strange new drinks. I hope to go someday and ruin my life.

I could start ruining my life with this drink. Day in and day out, this tangy little number is like nothing we have here in the States. I don't know why. It could be a tariff issue since I don't know if we have green plums here, but we all know that if you hang a basket of green plums on the landing gear of a helicopter you can bring anything anywhere. Remember in The Simpsons where Bart brought chazwozlers, I mean frogs, to Australia and then on the way back, a koala just casually hung off the side of the chopper? Just hang a little picnic basket off the base of it and you've got it.

This is not overly sweet and it brings a genuine tanginess that I don't get with anything. It's small enough that I can drink the whole thing and not get sick of it. The taste is different and I can't describe it. It's not a standard plum, so it's not that. It's a bit like a green grape juice but with more zip. Zip. Yeah. Look it up in a book. The internet is tired.

My friend Biff, who is a fellow Juggalo historian, I and decided to get together for a viewing of Stranglemania. For those who don't know, Stranglemania is Insane Clown Posse commentating on old Japanese wrestling death matches. What better drink to consume during the viewing than Faygo. Sadly, Biff asked me not to spray his room with Faygo.

This is a flavor I've been looking forward to trying for a while. I love grapefruit soda, but have never had a grapefruit/lime mixed soda. I must say, it's quite nice. It has the tart flavor of the grapefruit with a nice lime aftertaste. It's a nice twist on a classic grapefruit pop.

There are two types of people in the world: those who love Mountain Dew, and those that think it's really disgusting. I am on team "Mountain Spew". I have had this Mountain Dew flavored energy drink before and didn't like it. I bought this for a friend who was going to be screen printing all night, but he ended up not needing it so I decided to drink it.

Now when you mix a drink I already hate with lots of typically gross tasting energy ingredients, it's a recipe for disaster. This taste like someone mixed Mountain Dew in a vat with a piece of carpet and then filtered it through a moldy sponge. Sure it does the job and gives you energy, but at what cost? I feel like my stomach hates me right now.

Things I've eaten today:
1. Raspberry yogurt. Good for you.
2. Deep fried chicken "Whopper" from a local pizza place. They are delicious, but not good for you.

So in order to meet myself in the middle with my daily nutrition guidelines, I decided on fruit punch. It's 100% of my vitamin C intake and probably has some other goodies in it. Here's the thing though. Sure, it's a HFCS jam, but it's got actual pear, orange, pineapple, grape, and apple juice in it. It is not bad and if you like fruit punch, you might want to grab this one because you will be surprised.

I did not have high hopes for it as it was on markdown and a place that already sells stuff on markdown, but look at me! I'm impressed.

Big bear. Big bear chase me. Big bear chase me until I buy his soda. I wasn't planning on buying this due to the plastic bottle and HFCS. I was told that it was really awesome and was pressured into it. I'm glad things happened that way. It's much better than other root beers in the same category. Black Bear is an accurate name because it tastes really dark. It's the closest I've ever had a "regular" pop come to tasting like a microbrew. I bet it would have calmed John Candy down after that bear chased him.

What was wrong with the old South? I mean, racism aside, it's been a pretty good place, right? Well, excluding all those floods, tornadoes, hurricanes, and all that stuff, too. You know what else is "wrong" with the south? This drink. It's bad. It's downright gross. It's super fake-tangy. It might at one time have been a legit company, but tasting this drink makes me want to write them off completely. Nothing in this bottle tastes sincere, like dating a girl with a killer body only to find out that tissue paper and Spandex made it that way. All that hard work was for nothing. Surprises. I don't know why, but I didn't like the looks of this drink the minute I laid my eyes on it. It does smell like lemonade but that sting that I get when I drink it...where does that come from? It's not a sour sting. It's a chemical sting. Like that sting you get from Brisk iced tea. What is that and where does it come from?

The South. Get your acts together. I'm sorry about your tragedies, but this is inexcusable.

Gentlemen, thank you for staying late this evening. As you know our new energy line goes to the bottling plant in the morning. Yes Johnson I know they are going to be in cans, but saying cannery sounds like we're talking about tuna, and I can assure you all that fish will not come into play here. The reason we are all here is because we have the cans designed with terrible Olde English typeface and all, but we have an empty space on the cans for our celebrity endorsement. We were sure we'd have someone by now, but Michael Jordan and ZZ Top have not returned my calls. Shocking, I know. So gentleman, unless one of you has a famous cousin we need to think of something else. How about a quote from a dead historical figure? Hmm who would be good? Who knew about energy? Tesla? Yeah he ruled but the populace isn't very familiar with him. Edison? I don't want people to associate us with his dark period. That whole electrocuting animals thing would probably turn PETA against us. Hmmmm. How about Ben Franklin. Him and electricity go hand in hand. I bet he would also love a drink that tastes like you mixed Red Bull and orange juice. Get me his biography! I'll flip it open and the first quote I randomly put my thumb on will be it. "Energy and persistence alter all things." Gold! Meeting adjourned. Looks like it wasn't a late night after all. Go home and spend some time with your families before the Franklin estate decides to sue us. I'm not getting clearance on that quote.

Things I know about martinis are as follow: olives may or may not be involved, gin is in it, James Bond liked them "shakened" not stirred, there are bars dedicated to them, they now come in a variety of fruit flavors, and finally people drink them when they want to pretend they are all sorts of fancy pants. I've never had a real one, and I never will. I will try fake versions of them, or mocktinis if you will.

I'm in a van with people who have tried the real deal and they all say this tastes nothing like what it's trying to imitate. I'm perfectly fine with that. They always sounded like a one-way ticket to Grossville to me. So it doesn't taste authentic, but it does taste like raspberry ginger ale minus the ginger ale. That would be raspberry soda for those of you playing along at home. It's nothing terribly special, but at least it doesn't taste like olives.

Today was the gay pride parade. I don't see how it's possible to not have a good time seeing hundreds of people having the time of their lives. Free like gay birds, these people did what they wanted, wore what they wanted, and acted how they wanted together as a society. If only every day, people were so accepting.

In between the parade and the after party, I went to our local beer merchant who also sells some pretty good drinks for the likes of the youths. I was lucky enough to find singles, or loosies, of Saranac's black cherry cream pop. I had come across this in my supermarket but it was only available in a sixer and I wasn't exactly ready to commit to that long-term relationship. So I picked this up, took a sip and was surprised. It had a really good black cherry taste followed by a smooth cream taste. While this was oh so cold this was good, but it was a warm day today.

I am an adult at times and I don't chug pop. What's the point? I sip and get the flavors I deserve. As I said, initially this was good and the half dozen of people who co-drank this with me agreed. I walked two blocks and something happened. The syrup congealed and got downright unsatisfying to drink. Everything kind of blended together.

If you want to try this and you want it to be good, drink it quickly or somehow keep it cool.

To whom it may concern,
What are you doing over there? Do you have three separate divisions? Your drinks have completely different flavors. You've got your Joe Shmo brand garbage like Brisk and this half and half which is quite possibly, top five worst half and half's I've ever had, and your TrueLeaf and your new 100% Natural line which are pretty amazing. So what's the deal? Here's what I think.

You've got the classics, the relics, the veterans, and the original line up. These guys are the people that started Lipton. They make stuff the way it should be made; real sugar, actual, real tea, natural flavors. These guys make the TrueLeaf.

You've got the new jacks, the rookies, the kids making the 100% Natural line. It's good for you and has natural sweeteners, which don't taste like liquid sewage and actually let the natural flavors shine through. They utilize the newest technologies and natural ingredients to allow the flavors to act as they should and stay low in calories.

Then you've got the 80's guys. Those jerks. Giant lapels and even bigger hair, these know-it-alls will do anything to turn a buck. Take this half and half, for instance. It's too sweet. It is clearly made from excess or overstock Brisk. Then there is lemonade in there. You can't really taste it, but you are left with the feeling on your tongue like you just drank lemonade but can't taste it. You know they're churning this out by the gallon and those 80's dudes are just sitting on their cigarette boats, blaring Van Halen's "1984" so loud that it's veering the ship off course.

Old dudes and young guns, why do you let yuppie jerks get away with bringing your entire company down? Yes, I understand that they carry the load of the company on their padded shoulders, but don't you want to be known as a quality tea manufacturer rather than a drink powerhouse? It's money versus integrity.

I love a lot of your stuff and I don't like a lot of your stuff. You've released more than any company and you've got a lot coming out all the time. Try and turn down the poor quality stuff and turn up the classic tastes.

Sincerely,
Mike of the Thirsty Dudes