Sports/Dietary Supplement - 535 Reviews
On Powered Refreshment Tropical Citrus
Jones, no one eats just pineapples anymore. That's so classic. Classic Jones. Eating only pineapples. Now everything is "tropical." All citric fruits all the time. Who has time to eat pineapples and bananas? Now this, this is what's up. This drink is called "On" and it's two fruits cutting your fruit eating time in half. Look, dude. I'm trying to help you. I know you're not too crazy about bananas but you'll be happy to know that this doesn't at all taste like them. It doesn't really taste like pineapple either. It just tastes...citric. It's good, though. It's like a pineapple if a pineapple didn't have any sort of bite.
What do you mean that you don't mind eating all your fruit one at a time? I said I'm trying to save you time? You don't care? You like wasting time eating all the fruit? You're a strange chap, Jones.
What do you mean that you don't mind eating all your fruit one at a time? I said I'm trying to save you time? You don't care? You like wasting time eating all the fruit? You're a strange chap, Jones.
- Rating
- Categories
- Energy Drink, Sports/Dietary Supplement and Diet
- Company
- On — Website — @ONbeverages
- Country
- United States
- Sweetener
- Cane Sugar
- Author
- Mike Literman on 7/4/14, 1:52 PM
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Glaceau Vitamin Water Energy Strawberry Lime
We all knew this was coming, right? I mean it seems like an obvious move for the biggest name in vitamin supplement beverages to release a line of energy drinks, which are more than likely the fastest growing market in the beverage world. They could have gone the easy way out and just dumped a bunch of taurine and other garbage in there to give people the little rush that they so desperately crave, but Glaceau is a company with some sort of standards and convictions. They were one of the first companies to move away from the trend of sweetening with High Fructose Corn Syrup, and they have at least put forth minimum effort to make their beverages slightly healthier than their competition. I'm not saying these beverages are the healthiest things in the world, but they are better than a lot of the garbage that stocks the shelves these days. As a result of all of this for their Energy line, Glaceau added green coffee bean extract (for caffeine) and B vitamins. You might not get the same dizzying highs as you would from all the Red Bull imitators out there, but you also will not experience those terrible crashes.
If you are familiar with Vitamin Water, and I assume you are if you are taking the time to read this dumb website, you can certainly imagine what the base of this drink tastes like. Envision a strawberry lime Vitamin Water. Now add in some green coffee bean extract, and you will have yourself a nice little beverage. It has a slightly different taste due to the green coffee, but trust me when I say it is nothing like what you think coffee tastes like. The extract is nothing like brewed coffee, it's slightly bitter, like green tea, except you know…β¬Β¦totally different. It's its own flavor.
Glaceau decided to take this wonderful drink a bit further and added two more things. One of them made the beverage more enjoyable, and the other took it down a peg or two. The beneficial addition was carbonation. I love bubbly drinks, so it was a definite plus for me. Unfortunately they also put in some stevia. It doesn't ruin the drink, or make it taste overly diet, but it's there a bit. It's a new trend for companies to use both cane sugar and a zero calorie sweetener to lower the sugar content, and it's a compromise I can handle. You lose a little bit of flavor, but you also won't become an obese mess that needs someone to flip them every so often so they don't get bed sores. Ugh.
If you are familiar with Vitamin Water, and I assume you are if you are taking the time to read this dumb website, you can certainly imagine what the base of this drink tastes like. Envision a strawberry lime Vitamin Water. Now add in some green coffee bean extract, and you will have yourself a nice little beverage. It has a slightly different taste due to the green coffee, but trust me when I say it is nothing like what you think coffee tastes like. The extract is nothing like brewed coffee, it's slightly bitter, like green tea, except you know…β¬Β¦totally different. It's its own flavor.
Glaceau decided to take this wonderful drink a bit further and added two more things. One of them made the beverage more enjoyable, and the other took it down a peg or two. The beneficial addition was carbonation. I love bubbly drinks, so it was a definite plus for me. Unfortunately they also put in some stevia. It doesn't ruin the drink, or make it taste overly diet, but it's there a bit. It's a new trend for companies to use both cane sugar and a zero calorie sweetener to lower the sugar content, and it's a compromise I can handle. You lose a little bit of flavor, but you also won't become an obese mess that needs someone to flip them every so often so they don't get bed sores. Ugh.
- Rating
- Categories
- Diet, Energy Drink and Sports/Dietary Supplement
- Company
- Glaceau — Website — @vitaminwater
- Country
- United States
- Sweetener
- Cane Sugar
- Author
- Jason Draper on 7/1/14, 12:03 PM
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Gatorade Perform 02 Low Calorie Citrus Mango
I know that Gatorade is meant to be consumed after some sort of physical activity in order to quench your thirst and replace lost electrolytes, but I'd also like to think that the person doing the drinking had burned off enough calories during said activity to counteract the sugar in the drink. These low calorie versions of theirs are borderline undrinkable. The thing that confuses me is that it's not that they taste diet, they just taste gross. This is sweetened with erythritol and Reb A as well as some sucrose. Normally a match up like that is the best you can get with zero calorie sweeteners, but it just tastes wrong here. I blame one of the other ingredients, because it has an aftertaste like I've never experienced. The initial taste is a general citrus flavor that's a tad diet, but that aftertaste just taste the drink on a weird turn and all of the passengers are thrown from the vehicle. It's just ghastly.
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- Categories
- Diet and Sports/Dietary Supplement
- Country
- United States
- Sweetener
- Sucrose
- Author
- Jason Draper on 6/27/14, 4:39 PM
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On Powered Refreshment Raspberry Limeade
John had recently gotten into a terrible car accident that made him lose his legs but between generous donors and Kickstarter, he managed to get himself into a primo set of new, top of the line, robotic legs. 2.4 gigahertz of ram, three USB ports, Bluetooth, pneumatics and more. Problem is that with all of those features and the augmented running and jumping is that it killed the battery in his robo-legs. It wasn't such a big deal when he would take it easy because he could just plug them into the wall at night with his phone and wake up to charged legs. At work he would often times have to run a cord to his legs to keep them charged.
One day on the way to work, he went to a shop and noticed a new drink called "On." It dubbed itself as "powered refreshment" and he thought that it would allow him to finally go wireless and not have to carry around cables wherever he went. He got to work and opened the drink and almost drank the whole thing. It was good but a little strange at times. It did taste like raspberry limeade would but the Erythritol gave it a strange bitterness different than what the lime would have given it. Regardless, he finished the whole thing and just as he did, Jane came over and told him that it was Carol's birthday and they were meeting in the conference room for cake. Excited, he jumped out of his chair and just as he did, he heard a beeping which could mean one of two things. Either a truck was backing up within the confides of his office or his legs ran out of batteries. Either way, he was stuck in the middle of the hallway unable to move. Carol came out to see where he was and he embarrassingly asked for his cord. She brought it to him along with a piece of cake which he had to eat standing in the hallway alone.
One day on the way to work, he went to a shop and noticed a new drink called "On." It dubbed itself as "powered refreshment" and he thought that it would allow him to finally go wireless and not have to carry around cables wherever he went. He got to work and opened the drink and almost drank the whole thing. It was good but a little strange at times. It did taste like raspberry limeade would but the Erythritol gave it a strange bitterness different than what the lime would have given it. Regardless, he finished the whole thing and just as he did, Jane came over and told him that it was Carol's birthday and they were meeting in the conference room for cake. Excited, he jumped out of his chair and just as he did, he heard a beeping which could mean one of two things. Either a truck was backing up within the confides of his office or his legs ran out of batteries. Either way, he was stuck in the middle of the hallway unable to move. Carol came out to see where he was and he embarrassingly asked for his cord. She brought it to him along with a piece of cake which he had to eat standing in the hallway alone.
- Rating
- Categories
- Energy Drink, Sports/Dietary Supplement and Diet
- Company
- On — Website — @ONbeverages
- Country
- United States
- Sweetener
- Cane Sugar
- Author
- Mike Literman on 6/24/14, 1:43 PM
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On Powered Refreshment Dragonfruit Tangerine
I brought this along with me when I was running errands yesterday, and I have to admit that I thought it was fairly gross and only took two sips. I was then placed in my cup holder and returned to my fridge when I got home. For the past 24 hours every time I opened the door to grab a drink or something to eat it just stared at me. I decided I should just take a few more sips, write a review and get it over with. The thing is when I tried it again today it tasted totally different and I enjoyed it. For some reason yesterday it had an overpowering aftertaste that I would liken to eating a pile of orange pulp that had all it's juice drained out. Not a happy time. Now that flavor is so miniscule I probably wouldn't even have noticed it unless I was looking or it, which I was.
To dumb this down for everyone to have a point of reference this would best be described as Vitamin Water that has natural caffeine and B vitamins added to it to give the drinker a little boost of energy (meant to increase stamina, boost brainpower, and enhance focus, not get you to participate in extreme sports). It's sweetened by a combination of cane sugar, erythritol and stevia, which gives it a lower calorie content without tasting overly diet. The flavor is light but pleasant. It could easily be passed off as a genuine Vitamin Water for those stubborn folks who don't like to try new things. I personally think this is a superior version to the low calorie beverages that particular company puts out. Dragonfruit is sometimes compared to a light kiwi, but I think it is its own fruit. I don't know how else to describe it though.
I don't know what was up with my taste buds yesterday, but I'm glad they are back in order. This is a beverage I can sit back and enjoy without any feelings of guilt and gluttony.
To dumb this down for everyone to have a point of reference this would best be described as Vitamin Water that has natural caffeine and B vitamins added to it to give the drinker a little boost of energy (meant to increase stamina, boost brainpower, and enhance focus, not get you to participate in extreme sports). It's sweetened by a combination of cane sugar, erythritol and stevia, which gives it a lower calorie content without tasting overly diet. The flavor is light but pleasant. It could easily be passed off as a genuine Vitamin Water for those stubborn folks who don't like to try new things. I personally think this is a superior version to the low calorie beverages that particular company puts out. Dragonfruit is sometimes compared to a light kiwi, but I think it is its own fruit. I don't know how else to describe it though.
I don't know what was up with my taste buds yesterday, but I'm glad they are back in order. This is a beverage I can sit back and enjoy without any feelings of guilt and gluttony.
- Rating
- Categories
- Diet, Energy Drink and Sports/Dietary Supplement
- Company
- On — Website — @ONbeverages
- Country
- United States
- Sweetener
- Cane Sugar
- Author
- Jason Draper on 6/22/14, 8:41 PM
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Vemma BodΓ’β¬Β’Γβ Vanilla Ice Cream
Okay, so last time I did one of these I followed directions to a T and mixed it with water. I wasn't too pleased with the consistency that gave me, as it turned out a tad on the slimy side. This time I threw caution to the wind and mixed it with unsweetened almond milk. After spending far too long vigorously mixing this up, because I didn't have the recommended shaker ball, I took a sip. Definitely less slimy, but it's still so, so thick. I'm talking like baby food thick here folks. It does not have the consistency of something one would think of ingesting. It feels foreign in a from another world sort of way. It's like aliens visited us, and said, “Hey dummies, you're doing food wrong. This is much simpler. It's thick and weird, but it gives you what you need in less time with less fuss.” Stupid jerk aliens are always pointing out our shortcomings.
Consistency aside, this has a nice light vanilla flavor. It doesn't taste cheap, like a bunch of vanilla extract was dumped in. It tastes like quality vanilla, as if real beans were used. I can see where they are going with the ice cream tag. I appreciate that they are not trying to make a health shake taste exactly like an unhealthy thing. There's some stevia in the mix, which you can taste a bit, but this is a drink for health and not leisure, so it's understandable and acceptable.
It takes a few sips to get acclimated to, but once you get over the strange viscosity this is downright enjoyable for a meal replacement shake.
Consistency aside, this has a nice light vanilla flavor. It doesn't taste cheap, like a bunch of vanilla extract was dumped in. It tastes like quality vanilla, as if real beans were used. I can see where they are going with the ice cream tag. I appreciate that they are not trying to make a health shake taste exactly like an unhealthy thing. There's some stevia in the mix, which you can taste a bit, but this is a drink for health and not leisure, so it's understandable and acceptable.
It takes a few sips to get acclimated to, but once you get over the strange viscosity this is downright enjoyable for a meal replacement shake.
- Rating
- Categories
- Diet, Mix/Concentrate and Sports/Dietary Supplement
- Country
- United States
- Sweetener
- Evaporated Cane Juice
- Author
- Jason Draper on 6/4/14, 12:27 PM
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H10O Vitamin Infused Water Orange Energy
All my life I have been told that men and women were created equally. Okay, except in those religion classes I took as a kid where they said man was created in god's image and then woman was made from man's rib. That's a pretty crappy deal for women. Lucky for them it's all make believe and stories, even I realized that before I was out of elementary school. So yeah, we're created equal. Then H10O comes along and tells us that men and women need different formulations of vitamins. Someone here is a liar, or just misinformed.
I'm not really that dumb. I mean I'm an idiot, but I have some intelligence. I know that certain vitamins and minerals are more effective for the different sexes. The real problem here is that this company is supplying those vitamins in a vehicle that tastes like crappy diet garbage.
This is a non-carbonated orange beverage that basically tastes like Tang that is rich in vitamins as well as caffeine and guarana. It wouldn't be so bad except the grossness of sucralose ruins it all. I appreciate that there is no sugar and no carbs in this, but as a society haven't we learned that there are better tasting alternatives in the world of zero calorie sweeteners? This drink had no chance of being exceptional, but it could have turned out much better than it did.
I'm not really that dumb. I mean I'm an idiot, but I have some intelligence. I know that certain vitamins and minerals are more effective for the different sexes. The real problem here is that this company is supplying those vitamins in a vehicle that tastes like crappy diet garbage.
This is a non-carbonated orange beverage that basically tastes like Tang that is rich in vitamins as well as caffeine and guarana. It wouldn't be so bad except the grossness of sucralose ruins it all. I appreciate that there is no sugar and no carbs in this, but as a society haven't we learned that there are better tasting alternatives in the world of zero calorie sweeteners? This drink had no chance of being exceptional, but it could have turned out much better than it did.
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- Categories
- Diet, Energy Drink and Sports/Dietary Supplement
- Country
- United States
- Sweetener
- Sucralose
- Author
- Jason Draper on 5/31/14, 6:11 PM
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Hydrive Energy Vitality Formula Mango Peach
Oh you can't drive “double nickels on the dime?” When you say that do you mean that you always drive slower than the 55 mph speed limit, or are you a speed demon, a lead foot?
This is just dumb. What am I even trying to talk about here? Minutemen and Sammy Hagar references? Complete nonsense.
Let's get down to the real business. Hydrive is a diet, uncarbonated energy drink. Some of their other flavors seem to also be hybrids of energy and sports drinks, but there is no mention of electrolytes anywhere on this label, so I'm going to assume this is straight energy. Even if it's not a sports/vitamin supplement beverage, it still tastes like some version of diet vitamin water.
If there was one thing I thought I knew in this world it was that anything diet that was also peach flavored was doomed for failure. Those two components don't interact very well, but in here I don't hate it. I certainly don't love it, because I don't think I could ever love anything that contained sucralose, but I made it through the entire bottle with no complaints. It definitely has that fake peach flavor, but the mango softens it up a bit, and it's not insanely fake sweet. You can tell the fake sugar is there, but it doesn't fully control the flavor, like it does in a lot of drinks.
If you're on a diet you could certainly do a lot worse than this.
This is just dumb. What am I even trying to talk about here? Minutemen and Sammy Hagar references? Complete nonsense.
Let's get down to the real business. Hydrive is a diet, uncarbonated energy drink. Some of their other flavors seem to also be hybrids of energy and sports drinks, but there is no mention of electrolytes anywhere on this label, so I'm going to assume this is straight energy. Even if it's not a sports/vitamin supplement beverage, it still tastes like some version of diet vitamin water.
If there was one thing I thought I knew in this world it was that anything diet that was also peach flavored was doomed for failure. Those two components don't interact very well, but in here I don't hate it. I certainly don't love it, because I don't think I could ever love anything that contained sucralose, but I made it through the entire bottle with no complaints. It definitely has that fake peach flavor, but the mango softens it up a bit, and it's not insanely fake sweet. You can tell the fake sugar is there, but it doesn't fully control the flavor, like it does in a lot of drinks.
If you're on a diet you could certainly do a lot worse than this.
- Rating
- Categories
- Diet, Energy Drink and Sports/Dietary Supplement
- Company
- Hydrive Energy — Website — @HYDRIVE
- Country
- United States
- Sweetener
- Sucralose
- Author
- Jason Draper on 5/15/14, 5:26 PM
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Slim Fast 321 Plan Creamy Milk Chocolate
Dear Slim Fast,
What is your name in reference to? Does it mean that by drinking your meal replacements one will lose weight quickly? Or perhaps you means that you will drink this and then refrain from eating other foods aka fasting? Perhaps it's a combination of the two. Whatever your origin story, I think it's a good choice for a moniker for a beverage that is supposed to help one lose weight.
Is it a good flavor name though? Creamy Milk Chocolate? I initially thought no, because I prefer dark chocolate so much more to milk chocolate. I then remembered that I'm a snob and a majority of the world loves milk chocolate, and referring to it as creamy is enticing. Bitter Dark Chocolate just doesn't have the same allure. I mean, I would be all over a drink named that, but I'm a maniac apparently.
The name is very appropriate for the flavor. This is very creamy and very chocolaty. This is what I wish chocolate milk were like. It's a little thicker than milk, due to the protein, but the flavor is also stronger. I would happily drink this instead of eating. Problem is I drank this about an hour ago and I am already hungry again. I think I need to starve myself so that my stomach shrinks down. I eat way too much food.
What is your name in reference to? Does it mean that by drinking your meal replacements one will lose weight quickly? Or perhaps you means that you will drink this and then refrain from eating other foods aka fasting? Perhaps it's a combination of the two. Whatever your origin story, I think it's a good choice for a moniker for a beverage that is supposed to help one lose weight.
Is it a good flavor name though? Creamy Milk Chocolate? I initially thought no, because I prefer dark chocolate so much more to milk chocolate. I then remembered that I'm a snob and a majority of the world loves milk chocolate, and referring to it as creamy is enticing. Bitter Dark Chocolate just doesn't have the same allure. I mean, I would be all over a drink named that, but I'm a maniac apparently.
The name is very appropriate for the flavor. This is very creamy and very chocolaty. This is what I wish chocolate milk were like. It's a little thicker than milk, due to the protein, but the flavor is also stronger. I would happily drink this instead of eating. Problem is I drank this about an hour ago and I am already hungry again. I think I need to starve myself so that my stomach shrinks down. I eat way too much food.
- Rating
- Categories
- Diet and Sports/Dietary Supplement
- Country
- United States
- Sweetener
- Sugar
- Author
- Jason Draper on 4/3/14, 12:35 PM
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Sobe Lifewater Acai Raspberry
Martha, I have zero idea as to why you keep buying me these diet drinks. I'm not fat, I'm just your average middle-aged man size and there is nothing wrong with that. I am comfortable in my body, as I hope you are in yours. I mean you don't see me going around ordering you salad when we go out do you? That would just be rude. If you want to eat that cookie-sunday explosion, you go for it. It's your life and you should enjoy it, just as I am going to enjoy my life in a way that is free from the poison diet taste.
Oh what's that? You didn't buy me this because you think I need to lose weight? You like my little paunch? Well isn't that adorable. Why though, why do you keep buying these Lifewaters and put them in my lunch. They taste delicious? I doubt that. You see it says right there “0 calories” on the label. In my world that means this might be better for you but it's going to taste horrendous.
Fine I'll take a sip if it will make you happy. Well Martha, I owe you an apology. This is pretty darn good. It's very light tasting. I can tell that it's diet, but it's not the normal flavor I associate with things of that nature. It's kind of hidden in the back, right there with the acai. That is actually odd because acai is such a powerful flavor most of the time. Don't look at me like that, yes I know what acai is and what it tastes like. Just because I work construction doesn't mean I'm a complete dufus. I like to get a fancy juice every now and then. That's not important though. This has a nice raspberry flavor with some acai hints around the edges. Like I said the taste of the stevia is somewhere below that.
I don't know how Sobe did it, but I will definitely be sipping on these at work now. Not only does it taste good but it's guaranteed that none of the other guys will steal it from me. Those jerks. Seriously though honey, are we getting some cookie-Sunday explosions or what. I've been thinking about it the entire time we've been talking about these drinks. Yes I know we'll have to drive a half hour to the restaurant, but I want what I want and what I want is hot fudge drizzled over a giant soft cookie with seven different types of ice cream below it.
Oh what's that? You didn't buy me this because you think I need to lose weight? You like my little paunch? Well isn't that adorable. Why though, why do you keep buying these Lifewaters and put them in my lunch. They taste delicious? I doubt that. You see it says right there “0 calories” on the label. In my world that means this might be better for you but it's going to taste horrendous.
Fine I'll take a sip if it will make you happy. Well Martha, I owe you an apology. This is pretty darn good. It's very light tasting. I can tell that it's diet, but it's not the normal flavor I associate with things of that nature. It's kind of hidden in the back, right there with the acai. That is actually odd because acai is such a powerful flavor most of the time. Don't look at me like that, yes I know what acai is and what it tastes like. Just because I work construction doesn't mean I'm a complete dufus. I like to get a fancy juice every now and then. That's not important though. This has a nice raspberry flavor with some acai hints around the edges. Like I said the taste of the stevia is somewhere below that.
I don't know how Sobe did it, but I will definitely be sipping on these at work now. Not only does it taste good but it's guaranteed that none of the other guys will steal it from me. Those jerks. Seriously though honey, are we getting some cookie-Sunday explosions or what. I've been thinking about it the entire time we've been talking about these drinks. Yes I know we'll have to drive a half hour to the restaurant, but I want what I want and what I want is hot fudge drizzled over a giant soft cookie with seven different types of ice cream below it.
- Rating
- Categories
- Diet and Sports/Dietary Supplement
- Company
- Sobe — Website — @sobeworld
- Country
- United States
- Sweetener
- Reb A
- Author
- Jason Draper on 3/20/14, 6:11 PM
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Vemma BodΓ’β¬Β’Γβ Chocolate Ice Cream Shake
The base behind all of the Vemma drinks is mangosteen. It's their shtick and they use it in their energy drinks as well as their protein beverages. I like mangosteen, and everyone needs a gimmick. I didn't expect it to be in this meal replacement powder, but there it is. Oh well.
Do Americans eat more than they should? I'm going to say that in 98% of cases, absolutely. I certainly do. I try not to, and most of the time I fail. I love food, even though most of the time I just eat it for sustenance, I just enjoy the process of eating for some weird reason. I find it relaxing. I also really enjoy foods that generally don't have protein (fruits and breads) so I don't feel full as quick. Now that I'm getting older and I realize that I need to take better care of myself, I'm trying to cut down the whole eating too much thing. These shakes are designed just for that. They are protein heavy meal supplements that are meant to help curb your intake of too much food.
The first thing I found weird about this drink is that you are supposed to mix the powder with water. I had a carton of unsweetened almond milk out and ready to go, and when I checked to see how much to use I saw that it said water, which resulted in me going “huh.” In my opinion the water makes this a bit strange. It causes the drink to become slimier than creamy and smooth, which is what I expect from these types of drinks. It seemed that in every sip the water was fighting to separate itself from the powder. Even though I mixed the hell out of it, it did not want to work as a cohesive unit.
Flavor wise it tasted like a watery chocolate drink. The chocolate flavor was pretty decent and it didn't have that gritty protein drink texture, nor the protein taste. It also did a good job mostly covering up the taste of the stevia. I can see where they get the ice cream name. It tastes a bit like a melted ice cream come made for diabetics.
I wasn't completely blown away by this, but I didn't hate it either. I'm not really who this is marketed towards, because I'm not battling my weight, but I think it could be very beneficial to those who are.
Do Americans eat more than they should? I'm going to say that in 98% of cases, absolutely. I certainly do. I try not to, and most of the time I fail. I love food, even though most of the time I just eat it for sustenance, I just enjoy the process of eating for some weird reason. I find it relaxing. I also really enjoy foods that generally don't have protein (fruits and breads) so I don't feel full as quick. Now that I'm getting older and I realize that I need to take better care of myself, I'm trying to cut down the whole eating too much thing. These shakes are designed just for that. They are protein heavy meal supplements that are meant to help curb your intake of too much food.
The first thing I found weird about this drink is that you are supposed to mix the powder with water. I had a carton of unsweetened almond milk out and ready to go, and when I checked to see how much to use I saw that it said water, which resulted in me going “huh.” In my opinion the water makes this a bit strange. It causes the drink to become slimier than creamy and smooth, which is what I expect from these types of drinks. It seemed that in every sip the water was fighting to separate itself from the powder. Even though I mixed the hell out of it, it did not want to work as a cohesive unit.
Flavor wise it tasted like a watery chocolate drink. The chocolate flavor was pretty decent and it didn't have that gritty protein drink texture, nor the protein taste. It also did a good job mostly covering up the taste of the stevia. I can see where they get the ice cream name. It tastes a bit like a melted ice cream come made for diabetics.
I wasn't completely blown away by this, but I didn't hate it either. I'm not really who this is marketed towards, because I'm not battling my weight, but I think it could be very beneficial to those who are.
- Rating
- Categories
- Mix/Concentrate and Sports/Dietary Supplement
- Country
- United States
- Sweetener
- Organic Evaporated Cane Juice
- Author
- Jason Draper on 3/17/14, 4:30 PM
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Neuro Daily Tangerine Citrus
It's harsh out there in this post apocalyptic world we live in. Ever since the beginning of the end us humans have had it rough. There are food shortages and finding clean water is proving to be harder and harder. The only electricity we have is through generators, and it's only matter of time before all the gas is gone and those prove to be pointless. We should have all listened to Ed Begley Jr and installed those solar panels. He's living like a king in his home watching old videos of Transylvania 6-5000, Even Cowgirls Get the Blues, and A Mighty Wind.
As you all know the atmosphere has gone into the toilet and in order to even breath the air around us we need to up our immunity systems. Lucky for all of us that Neuro stepped up to the plate a created a once a day beverage that does just that. The beverage that is helping keep us all alive is packed with vitamin D, vitamin C, zinc amongst others to keep us healthy and alive.
Since we have to keep on our toes, due to the roving packs of mutants that threaten our very existence, the drink is sweetened with sucralose along with crystalline fructose. No one needs those extra pounds holding them back these days. Well actually, we won't have to worry about those extra pounds once the food shortage gets worse, which is inevitable.
As diet as this might be, it doesn't taste horrible. Tangerines were a wonderful fruit when they still existed. Neuro does a good job replicating their taste, and the citrus taste really cuts through the diet garbage. Is it an ideal flavor? No, but it's much better than it could be and sacrificing a little flavor is fine by me for the benefits it gives us, you know like staying alive.
It's a harsh world, indeed.
As you all know the atmosphere has gone into the toilet and in order to even breath the air around us we need to up our immunity systems. Lucky for all of us that Neuro stepped up to the plate a created a once a day beverage that does just that. The beverage that is helping keep us all alive is packed with vitamin D, vitamin C, zinc amongst others to keep us healthy and alive.
Since we have to keep on our toes, due to the roving packs of mutants that threaten our very existence, the drink is sweetened with sucralose along with crystalline fructose. No one needs those extra pounds holding them back these days. Well actually, we won't have to worry about those extra pounds once the food shortage gets worse, which is inevitable.
As diet as this might be, it doesn't taste horrible. Tangerines were a wonderful fruit when they still existed. Neuro does a good job replicating their taste, and the citrus taste really cuts through the diet garbage. Is it an ideal flavor? No, but it's much better than it could be and sacrificing a little flavor is fine by me for the benefits it gives us, you know like staying alive.
It's a harsh world, indeed.
- Rating
- Categories
- Diet and Sports/Dietary Supplement
- Company
- Neuro — Website — @drinkneuro
- Country
- United States
- Sweetener
- Crystalline Fructose
- Author
- Jason Draper on 3/6/14, 1:03 PM
- Buy It Amazon.com
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Naked Protein Zone
With a name like “Protein Zone” I expected nothing but grit and grossness, as there's a level of that to be expected in any drink with that specific functionality. The picture of the banana and coconut on the label also had me weary. Coconut water is just fine, but anything that tastes even remotely like toasted coconut belongs in the filth bin, with all of the bananas on this planet. Thankfully the orange and pineapple that are also pictured carry most, if not all, of the added flavor. Sure, there is a texture to this that makes me feel like I took this to the beach and left the cap off as people walked by and kicked a bit of sand into it, but hey I'm strangely okay with that. It has a nice tropical flavor that makes up for the weird texture.
- Rating
- Categories
- Juice and Sports/Dietary Supplement
- Company
- Naked — Website — @Naked_Juice
- Country
- United States
- Sweetener
- No Sugar Added
- Author
- Jason Draper on 2/26/14, 5:49 PM
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Slim Fast 321 Plan French Vanilla
Oh Slim Fast you were the bane of everyone who enjoyed sweets in the 80s. Okay that's pushing it, but those of us who were kids at the time hated you. Our parents (my mother) bought them to try and help them to lose weight and the promise of a wonderful chocolate drink led countless of us to steal them for our own glory. Unfortunately for underdeveloped taste buds all around the country those beverages were not the treats we wanted at all. Everything about them tasted wrong. I'm assuming it was due to some sort of artificial sweetener. Ugh.
Here I sit, more than 25 years later and I just did not want to drink this, even though it's my duty as a Thirsty Dude. Sometimes you just have to suck it up. That is exactly what I did, literally, and this is much better than I ever remember. Perhaps it's my more refined palate at a later age, and perhaps it's that they use sugar along with sucralose to sweeten it. It tastes like a melted vanilla milkshake with some protein in it, and it has that consistency as well. It's a bit on the thick side, but it's not all chalky from the protein, so I'll take it. Everything in here does a good job to mask the taste of the sucralose, which was my main concern with this drink. Sucralose has overthrown aspartame as the new king of hell.
Here I sit, more than 25 years later and I just did not want to drink this, even though it's my duty as a Thirsty Dude. Sometimes you just have to suck it up. That is exactly what I did, literally, and this is much better than I ever remember. Perhaps it's my more refined palate at a later age, and perhaps it's that they use sugar along with sucralose to sweeten it. It tastes like a melted vanilla milkshake with some protein in it, and it has that consistency as well. It's a bit on the thick side, but it's not all chalky from the protein, so I'll take it. Everything in here does a good job to mask the taste of the sucralose, which was my main concern with this drink. Sucralose has overthrown aspartame as the new king of hell.
- Rating
- Categories
- Diet and Sports/Dietary Supplement
- Country
- United States
- Sweetener
- Sugar
- Author
- Jason Draper on 2/20/14, 5:39 PM
- Buy It Amazon.com
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Core Power Natural High Protein Milkshake Honey
Do I need more protein in my diet? I don't know let me check the chart. I seem to be doing alright on fiber, attitude, body mass index, those are all alright. What else do we have here? Ice cream intake is low, oil pressure is good, Altitude is at an acceptable level, and the water level is up to the line. I don't see...oh here it is. Protein. Yeah, protein level is slightly below the line. Can't I just eat a chicken sandwich or something? No? Why not? They don't sell any here? This is a restaurant. What restaurant doesn't sell anything with chicken in it? No meat? At all? That's fine. I guess I'll have a salad then. No salad? You're a restaurant, right? You know what a restaurant is, right? What do you have here? Just drinks? Fine. I'll just look at the menu. Whatever. Whatever you have. Why did I come here? Didn't they have a menu outside that I could have looked at? I'm telling you, Times Square has changed. They were right?
Oh, thanks. What is this? Oh, a protein drink with honey in it? Seems like something you just whipped up. Thanks. You know what, though? It just tastes like milk with honey in it, which in itself is mildly refreshing. It's a protein drink, which is surprising because it doesn't taste like there is a bucket of sand in it. It's actually not bad. I would have enjoyed that chicken sandwich that I kind of developed a taste for but this is a close, I don't know, eighth, maybe ninth.
I don't know. That's a good question. Would I recommend this restaurant? You're going to hate me for saying this, but I'm still not convinced that this is an actual restaurant. How do you make ends meet? This place is like two thousand square feet and one block from Times Square. It's got to cost like ten thousand dollars a month to be here. You've got to be in cahoots with someone. Oh, that hit a nerve. No, look, I can see myself out. Thank you for the drink. I left a nice tip.
Oh, thanks. What is this? Oh, a protein drink with honey in it? Seems like something you just whipped up. Thanks. You know what, though? It just tastes like milk with honey in it, which in itself is mildly refreshing. It's a protein drink, which is surprising because it doesn't taste like there is a bucket of sand in it. It's actually not bad. I would have enjoyed that chicken sandwich that I kind of developed a taste for but this is a close, I don't know, eighth, maybe ninth.
I don't know. That's a good question. Would I recommend this restaurant? You're going to hate me for saying this, but I'm still not convinced that this is an actual restaurant. How do you make ends meet? This place is like two thousand square feet and one block from Times Square. It's got to cost like ten thousand dollars a month to be here. You've got to be in cahoots with someone. Oh, that hit a nerve. No, look, I can see myself out. Thank you for the drink. I left a nice tip.
- Rating
- Categories
- Milkshake and Sports/Dietary Supplement
- Company
- Core Power — Website — @CorePower
- Country
- United States
- Sweetener
- Honey
- Author
- Mike Literman on 2/17/14, 11:43 AM
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Empress' Secret Glow Refreshing Ginger Taste
There's a movie in here somewhere. A woman is diagnosed with hyperthyroidism, an autoimmune disease for which there is no cure. Her family and friends try to console her and help her deal with her unfortunate predicament, but our heroine will hear none of it. She is determined to beat this disease and live a long and full life. She begins altering her diet and making the appropriate changes in her lifestyle that are rumored to help combat hyperthyroidism. Her changes are just not working and she's on the fast track to getting radioactive iodine to kill her thyroid, which would lead to a regimen of artificial thyroid hormones for the rest of her life. Things are looking bleak and it looks like the bright future that was once promised to a young girl will not come to pass.
They say it's darkest before the dawn (they being people who like to quote other people) and that is when our Lola (Did I not mention her name before?) decided to take her life in her own hands and find a new way. She knew deep down that natural medicine would be the only real chance she had in life. She delved into ancient texts of Traditional Chinese medicine looking for answers. Can't you just see the montage now of her laboring late at night translating the ancients language? There are moments of frustration and despair, but eventually she hits on an idea and takes bits from here and pieces from there to create a unique concoction that just might work!
With her formulation complete, Lola underwent a six week treatment and by the end she was completely off here meds and her blood work was back to normal. The movie would end just as the first run of Lola's mass produced herbal treatment beverage was being bottled at the plant and all is right in the world.
I know we make up a lot of garbage here at Thirsty Dudes, because..well it's what lives in our brains. I can assure you though that this story is real and the beverage before me is the final outcome. It is a herbal drink that boasts to reverse the effects of aging, boost the immune system and calms the nervous system. I can't say for certain if it works or not, and I don't have it readily available to drink it on the regular, but if Lola's story is any indication that drink is a thing of wonder.
One thing I can comment on as a professional is the taste of this drink, and I think it's great. The ingredients that make up this compound are water, jujube dates, goji berries, dragon eye fruit, lemon juice, organic dried ginger, lotus seeds and ginseng. For those type of ingredients I am surprised that it tastes like a vaguely fruity ginger water. It's got a nice little kick from the ginger, but not to an extent that you have any sort of problem finishing a serving. When health benefits come with a nice flavor like this you know that there is good in the world and everything isn't just pointless.
They say it's darkest before the dawn (they being people who like to quote other people) and that is when our Lola (Did I not mention her name before?) decided to take her life in her own hands and find a new way. She knew deep down that natural medicine would be the only real chance she had in life. She delved into ancient texts of Traditional Chinese medicine looking for answers. Can't you just see the montage now of her laboring late at night translating the ancients language? There are moments of frustration and despair, but eventually she hits on an idea and takes bits from here and pieces from there to create a unique concoction that just might work!
With her formulation complete, Lola underwent a six week treatment and by the end she was completely off here meds and her blood work was back to normal. The movie would end just as the first run of Lola's mass produced herbal treatment beverage was being bottled at the plant and all is right in the world.
I know we make up a lot of garbage here at Thirsty Dudes, because..well it's what lives in our brains. I can assure you though that this story is real and the beverage before me is the final outcome. It is a herbal drink that boasts to reverse the effects of aging, boost the immune system and calms the nervous system. I can't say for certain if it works or not, and I don't have it readily available to drink it on the regular, but if Lola's story is any indication that drink is a thing of wonder.
One thing I can comment on as a professional is the taste of this drink, and I think it's great. The ingredients that make up this compound are water, jujube dates, goji berries, dragon eye fruit, lemon juice, organic dried ginger, lotus seeds and ginseng. For those type of ingredients I am surprised that it tastes like a vaguely fruity ginger water. It's got a nice little kick from the ginger, but not to an extent that you have any sort of problem finishing a serving. When health benefits come with a nice flavor like this you know that there is good in the world and everything isn't just pointless.
- Rating
- Categories
- Ginger and Sports/Dietary Supplement
- Company
- Empress' Secret — Website
- Country
- United States
- Sweetener
- No Sugar Added
- Author
- Jason Draper on 2/11/14, 9:20 PM
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Shakeology Chocolate
I don't understand it, honey. Sammy just refuses to eat vegetables. I don't know what to do. I've taken away videos games, dessert, television, and his bike and he just won't eat them. What did you buy? A milkshake? Honey that sounds like a reward more than it does a punishment. It's got what in it? I don't know what any of that is. Ashwagandha? Cordyceps, Tulsi, Sacha Inchi, Spirulina? Are you just reading a Dr. Seuss book to me? You're making these words up, right? You're not. What do they do? They're healthy? Well I guess that's good to know. Now it's a milkshake. Isn't there a ton of sugar in it that's going to get him to bounce off the walls? Oh, it's made with Stevia? That's cool. Well I guess it all comes down to taste. How does it taste, honey. Oh, you made some? Thanks.
Honey. This...this isn't bad at all. I mean I can taste that something is up but our kid, let's be honest here, he's kind of an idiot. Right? You agree with me. I mean, who doesn't just eat vegetables and takes punishment after punishment. Peas never hurt anyone and corn is fantastic. Kids. Am I right? Can I have more of this? Yeah, I was worried that this would just taste like a gritty mess like protein drinks do but it actually tastes good. You made this with eight ounces of milk? Oh wow. That turned into like double that. Cool. He'll feel like he's getting a real treat but in reality, we're poisoning him with healthy stuff.
When he gets home we'll make him something like a hamburger with a side of green beans just so he thinks nothing is up and we'll serve it with this milkshake. He'll think he's pulling one over on us by not eating the green beans and just eat the hamburger and drink the milkshake. Never thought it would come to this but if I have to trick my dumb son into eating healthy, so be it. He'll learn when he's 300 pounds and constantly sweating like your uncle Larry. Yeah, I said it, honey. He's constantly sweating. Like you didn't know.
Honey. This...this isn't bad at all. I mean I can taste that something is up but our kid, let's be honest here, he's kind of an idiot. Right? You agree with me. I mean, who doesn't just eat vegetables and takes punishment after punishment. Peas never hurt anyone and corn is fantastic. Kids. Am I right? Can I have more of this? Yeah, I was worried that this would just taste like a gritty mess like protein drinks do but it actually tastes good. You made this with eight ounces of milk? Oh wow. That turned into like double that. Cool. He'll feel like he's getting a real treat but in reality, we're poisoning him with healthy stuff.
When he gets home we'll make him something like a hamburger with a side of green beans just so he thinks nothing is up and we'll serve it with this milkshake. He'll think he's pulling one over on us by not eating the green beans and just eat the hamburger and drink the milkshake. Never thought it would come to this but if I have to trick my dumb son into eating healthy, so be it. He'll learn when he's 300 pounds and constantly sweating like your uncle Larry. Yeah, I said it, honey. He's constantly sweating. Like you didn't know.
- Rating
- Categories
- Milkshake, Mix/Concentrate and Sports/Dietary Supplement
- Company
- Shakeology — Website — @shakeology
- Country
- United States
- Sweetener
- Stevia
- Author
- Mike Literman on 2/11/14, 4:43 PM
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Muscletech 100% Premium Protein Deluxe Chocolate
With a flavor title like “Deluxe Chocolate” a company has some pretty large shoes to fill, hopefully chocolate covered shoes that are made of a slightly darker chocolate that have never come anywhere near contact with any body parts, especially the feet.
One would think that making a delicious chocolate beverage would be a fairly easy task. The process of melting chocolate down, or shaving it into a powder is not a complicated one, yet companies fail at it all the time. I want a nice dark chocolate drink that tastes like I'm biting into a high quality bar of goodness. Sadly this has yet to happen. I by no means thought that this was going to be what I have searched for, but I did expect it to be a little more than it is. Do you want to know the downfall of this protein drink? No, it's not that it has milk protein added to it. That actually doesn't bother me too much these days. The moment this company went wrong was when they decided to add sucralose. Adding any sort of sweetener to this doesn't seem necessary. I like my chocolate dark with little to no sugar added. Maybe it helps with covering up the protein powder, but I would 100% rather deal with that then the diet aftertaste this drink leaves in your mouth. I don't expect them to use real sugar, as this beverage is to help with muscle growth/weight loss, I'm just saying lay off the sweetener altogether. When you drink it, the sucralose is only there slightly but thirsty seconds after you swallow, you can just taste it sucking all of the liquid out of your taste buds. I can't imagine anyone liking that scenario.
As far as the chocolate taste goes, it's completely fine, but it doesn't have the darkness I crave. So those now melty shoes have been left unfilled, which is for the best, because I'm looking to eat those things in a second.
One would think that making a delicious chocolate beverage would be a fairly easy task. The process of melting chocolate down, or shaving it into a powder is not a complicated one, yet companies fail at it all the time. I want a nice dark chocolate drink that tastes like I'm biting into a high quality bar of goodness. Sadly this has yet to happen. I by no means thought that this was going to be what I have searched for, but I did expect it to be a little more than it is. Do you want to know the downfall of this protein drink? No, it's not that it has milk protein added to it. That actually doesn't bother me too much these days. The moment this company went wrong was when they decided to add sucralose. Adding any sort of sweetener to this doesn't seem necessary. I like my chocolate dark with little to no sugar added. Maybe it helps with covering up the protein powder, but I would 100% rather deal with that then the diet aftertaste this drink leaves in your mouth. I don't expect them to use real sugar, as this beverage is to help with muscle growth/weight loss, I'm just saying lay off the sweetener altogether. When you drink it, the sucralose is only there slightly but thirsty seconds after you swallow, you can just taste it sucking all of the liquid out of your taste buds. I can't imagine anyone liking that scenario.
As far as the chocolate taste goes, it's completely fine, but it doesn't have the darkness I crave. So those now melty shoes have been left unfilled, which is for the best, because I'm looking to eat those things in a second.
- Rating
- Categories
- Sports/Dietary Supplement
- Company
- Muscletech — Website — @TeamMuscleTech
- Country
- United States
- Sweetener
- Sucralose
- Author
- Jason Draper on 2/10/14, 6:49 PM
- Buy It Amazon.com
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A-GAME Cross Functional Beverage Strawberry Lemonade
We've drunk A-Game before but now, and this is no pun intended, they have brought their A-Game because this is pretty great. It's got the drinkability of a Gatorade but has a tiny bit of bite from the lemonade and a pretty good strawberry taste. Strawberry lemonade is pretty much always a win for me but I won't put it by companies to screw it up. This drink doesn't have any sort of unwanted bite like you might get from some other lemonades that are made with garbage sugar. I'm no scientist but whatever crystalline fructose is, it makes a good sweetener. There is also honey in here and actual sea salt. It's a pretty good drink all around. A-Game, A-Game.
- Rating
- Categories
- Lemonade and Sports/Dietary Supplement
- Company
- A-GAME — Website — @drinkagame
- Country
- United States
- Sweetener
- Crystalline Fructose
- Author
- Mike Literman on 2/10/14, 1:09 PM
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Halo Blackberry Plum
Did you know that Trent Reznor/Nine Inch Nails are the masterminds behind this beverage? I think it may have been part of the weird Year Zero marketing that was going on. If you're a fan of the band you may know that every release the band puts out gets a Halo number. Halo 1 was the Down In It single. Year Zero was Halo 24. I'm pretty sure this is Halo 24-Pi or something weird like that. Here's some background into that whole thing:. Weird, right?
I don't remember exactly how this drink fit into everything. Maybe it was what was served at the secret shows, and one of the bottles had a USB drive in it with a secret song or something. All I do know is that they were strange and awesome times, which I wish I had been apart of.
This flavored water is infused with trehalose, which comes from the resurrection plant and helps it to regenerate after a century of drought. So there has to be some sort of coded meaning in that. I mean the movie is about some distopian future, and I can only assume that by using trehalose they were hinting that society needed to regenerate into a functioning unit. Oh, and that specific ingredient has shown benefits in the realms of anti inflammatory, anti oxidant, neuro-protectant and reducing cell damage from dehydration.
This tastes like very lightly sweetened, perhaps even lighter flavored water. It's pleasant and completely unobtrusive. It's like when people soak fruit in water to flavor it, instead of adding juice to it. You get hints of the fruit without it being the main player in the game.
Okay, it looks like this product came out after Year Zero, so apparently there is no connection, but according to their website it was developed in 2007, the same year the record came out. Coincidence? I think not!
I don't remember exactly how this drink fit into everything. Maybe it was what was served at the secret shows, and one of the bottles had a USB drive in it with a secret song or something. All I do know is that they were strange and awesome times, which I wish I had been apart of.
This flavored water is infused with trehalose, which comes from the resurrection plant and helps it to regenerate after a century of drought. So there has to be some sort of coded meaning in that. I mean the movie is about some distopian future, and I can only assume that by using trehalose they were hinting that society needed to regenerate into a functioning unit. Oh, and that specific ingredient has shown benefits in the realms of anti inflammatory, anti oxidant, neuro-protectant and reducing cell damage from dehydration.
This tastes like very lightly sweetened, perhaps even lighter flavored water. It's pleasant and completely unobtrusive. It's like when people soak fruit in water to flavor it, instead of adding juice to it. You get hints of the fruit without it being the main player in the game.
Okay, it looks like this product came out after Year Zero, so apparently there is no connection, but according to their website it was developed in 2007, the same year the record came out. Coincidence? I think not!
- Rating
- Categories
- Sports/Dietary Supplement and Water
- Country
- United States
- Sweetener
- Cane Sugar
- Author
- Jason Draper on 2/8/14, 1:52 PM
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