United States - 4098 Reviews
Cascal Fermented Soda Berry Cassis
With the exception of Bright Citrus, us folks here at Thirsty Dudes have not been huge fans of Cascal sodas. I think we would have loved most of the flavors, if the whole point of the company weren't that they make fermented sodas. Take away the fermentation and slight alcohol taste that it causes and these would be severely interesting sodas. With flavors like apple and anise things are bound to get wacky. Unfortunately that flavor that is gross to those of us who don't drink gets in the way and ruins everything. I have to admit that my friends who do partake in alcohol like these a lot more than those of us who do not. I believe they are accustomed to that flavor.
While this flavor does tastes a bit hoppy, it didn't bother me as much as it has with the other flavors. Perhaps I myself am becoming more accustomed to the flavor, but it wasn't bad. It tastes like a citrus and berry soda, two flavors that normally don't commingle. Why is that? There is berry based fruit punch and tropical citrus bases, but it's not often that they overlap. That needs to change because if this drink is any indication they pair nicely. It's a good tasting sparkling juice and as I said if you don't mind the fermentation flavor grab yourself a can.
While this flavor does tastes a bit hoppy, it didn't bother me as much as it has with the other flavors. Perhaps I myself am becoming more accustomed to the flavor, but it wasn't bad. It tastes like a citrus and berry soda, two flavors that normally don't commingle. Why is that? There is berry based fruit punch and tropical citrus bases, but it's not often that they overlap. That needs to change because if this drink is any indication they pair nicely. It's a good tasting sparkling juice and as I said if you don't mind the fermentation flavor grab yourself a can.
- Rating
- Company
- Cascal — Website — @CheersCascal
- Country
- United States
- Sweetener
- Rebiana
- Author
- Jason Draper on 5/19/12, 4:30 PM
- Buy It Amazon.com
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Jelly Belly Gourmet Soda Crushed Pineapple
One thing I would like to do before I die is chop a pineapple down from a tree and eat it. I guess I could have someone more skilled get it down for me but I want it inside of me no more than two minutes after it came down from the tree. That's a fresh pineapple. I want it. I don't think that's a dramatic request. I can catch it, even though I am aware it might hurt me. It's like a slightly spikey, oddly shaped football. I love pineapple, though and want a fresh one. No more of this out of season garbage. Fresh, son.
This pop, although probably distant from a fresh pineapple, tastes a lot like pineapple. Not quite carbonated pineapple juice, but close. It's very sweet. You should not drink this alone. It's not destructive in its calories content at a pretty standard 120, but it is sweet, man.
Who knows, a fresh pineapple might not be that far away. I don't have any plans to travel to an exotic paradise any time soon but in the scheme of things, even five years isn't that long to have to wait for hopefully the best pineapple I will ever have in my life.
This pop, although probably distant from a fresh pineapple, tastes a lot like pineapple. Not quite carbonated pineapple juice, but close. It's very sweet. You should not drink this alone. It's not destructive in its calories content at a pretty standard 120, but it is sweet, man.
Who knows, a fresh pineapple might not be that far away. I don't have any plans to travel to an exotic paradise any time soon but in the scheme of things, even five years isn't that long to have to wait for hopefully the best pineapple I will ever have in my life.
- Rating
- Categories
- Soda Pop
- Company
- Jelly Belly — Website — @jellybellyteam
- Country
- United States
- Sweetener
- Cane Sugar
- Author
- Mike Literman on 5/18/12, 4:39 PM
- Buy It Amazon.com
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Day's Old Fashioned Root Beer
I've had Day's stuff before. It's good. It's basic, but it's good. I wanted a root beer so I went through my stash, picked one out, went to put it in the fridge, and noticed that this was queued up all ready to go. Awesome.
Now I will admit that I've become a bit of a drink snob since I've been doing the website. It happens since I drink so much. I have to pick favorites and you really get to hone down what you really want in a specific drink. Teas I like a little bitey. Root beer I like dark with a lot of licorice. Sweet tea I like with real sugar and as little ingredients as I can get. When I come across a can of root beer with high fructose corn syrup, I almost instantly don't care. I will still drink it with an open mind, but my brain tells me that I already know what it's going to taste like. This was different.
There is a little bite to this and the ingredients don't really do the drink itself justice, I feel. This is a medium to dark root beer with a strong root beer taste. It tastes less sweet than a standard root beer would taste. The fact that I'm still explaining how this tastes is extra credit to them. What's great is this is good enough to get again and I don't think it's hard to find.
Day's; I'm sorry for not having faith in you. You have most certainly earned it.
Now I will admit that I've become a bit of a drink snob since I've been doing the website. It happens since I drink so much. I have to pick favorites and you really get to hone down what you really want in a specific drink. Teas I like a little bitey. Root beer I like dark with a lot of licorice. Sweet tea I like with real sugar and as little ingredients as I can get. When I come across a can of root beer with high fructose corn syrup, I almost instantly don't care. I will still drink it with an open mind, but my brain tells me that I already know what it's going to taste like. This was different.
There is a little bite to this and the ingredients don't really do the drink itself justice, I feel. This is a medium to dark root beer with a strong root beer taste. It tastes less sweet than a standard root beer would taste. The fact that I'm still explaining how this tastes is extra credit to them. What's great is this is good enough to get again and I don't think it's hard to find.
Day's; I'm sorry for not having faith in you. You have most certainly earned it.
- Rating
- Country
- United States
- Sweetener
- High Fructose Corn Syrup
- Author
- Mike Literman on 5/17/12, 3:21 PM
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Pacific Breeze White Tea Acai
Johnny was a small-town boy. He grew up in a town with one stoplight, one gas station, one barber, and a local grocery store. He was listening to the radio and heard a sweepstakes where he could win a trip to "the big city." He was the tenth caller, won the prize, and before you knew it, he was on his way. He had been on a train before, but only a few towns over, never this far. It was a two-day trek and Johnny was more than prepared. When he arrived at the hotel in the city, he brought his one bag up and headed back down to enjoy the city itself.
He was a bit thirsty and went next door to a small store to get a drink. There was an endcap, which advertised a low calories, iced tea mix that you could mix with a bottle of water. He remembered that the hotel had a six-pack of water ready for him so he bypassed some of the stranger drinks.
Johnny went upstairs to make some tea and ran into a couple cute girls who he invited them up to his room. He told the girls to relax while he went into the bathroom to mix up a bottle of tea so that in the case that it made a mess, it wouldn't be too bad to clean up. He heard the girls talking and didn't think anything of it. He sat down on the bath to drink a little of the tea and initially it was a bit strong. He could have mixed it into a larger bottle of water, but all he had was a smaller bottle. It was a little bitter and did have some acai flavor. Acai was not a flavor he was familiar with but he thought it was bitter on bitter but mixed with a lot of sweet kind of evened things out. He drank about half of the bottle before he got up to see what the girls were up to. He went to leave the bathroom but the door was stuck. There was a phone in the bathroom, which he used to call the front desk to tell them that he was trapped in the bathroom. They came up and let him out and asked him what he was doing. He told them that he let some nice girls come in the room while he made some tea and then the door wouldn't open. The man asked him what happened to the television and Johnny didn't know what he was talking about. When he walked out of the bathroom, he noticed that the television, radio, coffee maker, and desk lamp was missing. The girls had robbed him. The maintenance man said that there is a security camera that was in front of the elevators and they won't be able to make it out of the hotel without being caught.
Johnny had been in the city for less than an hour and had already gotten robbed. He will never wonder again why his parents and grandparents never went to the city. City girls were trouble and he spent the rest of his trip not talking to anyone.
He was a bit thirsty and went next door to a small store to get a drink. There was an endcap, which advertised a low calories, iced tea mix that you could mix with a bottle of water. He remembered that the hotel had a six-pack of water ready for him so he bypassed some of the stranger drinks.
Johnny went upstairs to make some tea and ran into a couple cute girls who he invited them up to his room. He told the girls to relax while he went into the bathroom to mix up a bottle of tea so that in the case that it made a mess, it wouldn't be too bad to clean up. He heard the girls talking and didn't think anything of it. He sat down on the bath to drink a little of the tea and initially it was a bit strong. He could have mixed it into a larger bottle of water, but all he had was a smaller bottle. It was a little bitter and did have some acai flavor. Acai was not a flavor he was familiar with but he thought it was bitter on bitter but mixed with a lot of sweet kind of evened things out. He drank about half of the bottle before he got up to see what the girls were up to. He went to leave the bathroom but the door was stuck. There was a phone in the bathroom, which he used to call the front desk to tell them that he was trapped in the bathroom. They came up and let him out and asked him what he was doing. He told them that he let some nice girls come in the room while he made some tea and then the door wouldn't open. The man asked him what happened to the television and Johnny didn't know what he was talking about. When he walked out of the bathroom, he noticed that the television, radio, coffee maker, and desk lamp was missing. The girls had robbed him. The maintenance man said that there is a security camera that was in front of the elevators and they won't be able to make it out of the hotel without being caught.
Johnny had been in the city for less than an hour and had already gotten robbed. He will never wonder again why his parents and grandparents never went to the city. City girls were trouble and he spent the rest of his trip not talking to anyone.
- Rating
- Categories
- Iced Tea and Mix/Concentrate
- Company
- Pacific Breeze — Website
- Country
- United States
- Sweetener
- Sucralose
- Author
- Mike Literman on 5/16/12, 3:18 PM
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Gatorade Fit 02 Melon Pear
That sun man. What a jerk. Beaming down on you all of the day. You've got to put on thick layers of creams and salves just to go outside. Das Racist knows what I'm talking about. White man can't even go outside without getting a disease. I feel it. I spent my youth inside playing Ultima on the computer with my friends because I didn't want to squint anymore and it was too hot and his house was air-conditioned. My mom would call down and have my friend's parents kick us outside. My friends hated me because of it.
Max, my little dude, needed a pair of sunglasses. I feel so bad for him in the backseat because apparently they have outlawed tinted static clings. I can't find them anywhere and because of that I had to get him some glasses. I bought some for him, he liked them, liked to wear them for three seconds, take them off, eat them, and throw them on the ground. When I found those glasses, I also found this drink.
I like melon. Love it, really. Pear? We all know where I stand on pears. Whocaresville. I don't hate the taste of pears, though. This was good. I was pleasantly surprised that it wasn't terribly sweet and actually had a pretty strong melon flavor. Pear is there, but not as much as melon and for that, I thank you, Gatorade. I would buy this again and the whole bottle is only 20 calories.
Next time you go to the store to buy sunglasses, sunscreen, suntan lotion, or a giant sun hat, pick this up, too and you'll be sure to survive one more day out in the sun.
Max, my little dude, needed a pair of sunglasses. I feel so bad for him in the backseat because apparently they have outlawed tinted static clings. I can't find them anywhere and because of that I had to get him some glasses. I bought some for him, he liked them, liked to wear them for three seconds, take them off, eat them, and throw them on the ground. When I found those glasses, I also found this drink.
I like melon. Love it, really. Pear? We all know where I stand on pears. Whocaresville. I don't hate the taste of pears, though. This was good. I was pleasantly surprised that it wasn't terribly sweet and actually had a pretty strong melon flavor. Pear is there, but not as much as melon and for that, I thank you, Gatorade. I would buy this again and the whole bottle is only 20 calories.
Next time you go to the store to buy sunglasses, sunscreen, suntan lotion, or a giant sun hat, pick this up, too and you'll be sure to survive one more day out in the sun.
- Rating
- Categories
- Sports/Dietary Supplement
- Country
- United States
- Sweetener
- Isomaltulose
- Author
- Mike Literman on 5/16/12, 2:08 PM
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Relax 5 Orange
Robert Van Winkle felt like a failure, and a disappointment to his family. When your great-great-grandfather is Rip Van Winkle you are expected to be able to sleep through anything. Unfortunately that was not true for Robert. Ever since he was a baby he was a bit on an insomniac. He would get in fights with his parents and they would tell him he was an embarrassment and they often accused him of abusing energy drinks. The truth is that he had never so much as tasted a drop of an energy drink. His lack of sleep was a natural thing. His theory was that his ancestors used up all of the sleep allocated to his bloodline, thus cursing him with constant wakefulness. The upside of this was that Robert became a genius. Since he rarely slept, he used all of his waking hours on his studies and quickly had several doctorates and became a scientist. He dreamed of someday creating a potion that would give him the relief of sleep that his family clung to so much.
This bottle that I hold in my hand is the result of years of endless research and trials. Robert Van Winkle finally overcame his demons and I'm happy to say that with the first shot that he drank he quickly fell into a long relaxed slumber. His success mixture tasted like gummy orange slices that had been liquefied. He was shocked at how his final version actually did not taste very intense. It didn't taste like chemicals like so many of his past attempts. He beat science and a family curse. Robert Van Winkle is a true American hero.
This bottle that I hold in my hand is the result of years of endless research and trials. Robert Van Winkle finally overcame his demons and I'm happy to say that with the first shot that he drank he quickly fell into a long relaxed slumber. His success mixture tasted like gummy orange slices that had been liquefied. He was shocked at how his final version actually did not taste very intense. It didn't taste like chemicals like so many of his past attempts. He beat science and a family curse. Robert Van Winkle is a true American hero.
- Rating
- Categories
- Shot and Relaxation
- Country
- United States
- Sweetener
- Sucralose
- Author
- Jason Draper on 5/16/12, 11:03 AM
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Maine Root Mexicane Cola
I've been looking for a nice, high quality cola for a while now. Jay was turned on to my search, too so now we're both on a little bit of a liquid quest. I went to get lunch and run errands with one of my bosses today and we stopped at a little sandwich place that usually has pretty good drinks. This, which is new, was there and I had to get it. I might not stop until I find a cola that I absolutely love. Five bottles and I'll stop and move on to something else. I was very anxious to get my hands on this. So much in fact that when I used the old "take the cap off the bottle by hitting it against a concrete curb" trick, this happened:

I have never done this before. If I ever break something, it's usually a small crack or a piece but this was the entire lip. It was downright hard to drink and quite dangerous. I may have shards of glass inside of me because if you think that not having a crucial part to a bottle will stop me from drinking you're crazy. I did what I set out to do which was drinking this cola and it was good. Cola, being inherently dark, didn't have a lot of the complexity that Maine Root stuff often has. Sure, "spices" was one of the ingredients, but it didn't really get to me. It was a good cola, though and if I had to compare it to something, it would be the Mexican Coke. I personally haven't had the Mexican Pepsi so I can't compare it to that.
I risk my lips and bowels for this website and for what? A great cola? You bet'cha!

I have never done this before. If I ever break something, it's usually a small crack or a piece but this was the entire lip. It was downright hard to drink and quite dangerous. I may have shards of glass inside of me because if you think that not having a crucial part to a bottle will stop me from drinking you're crazy. I did what I set out to do which was drinking this cola and it was good. Cola, being inherently dark, didn't have a lot of the complexity that Maine Root stuff often has. Sure, "spices" was one of the ingredients, but it didn't really get to me. It was a good cola, though and if I had to compare it to something, it would be the Mexican Coke. I personally haven't had the Mexican Pepsi so I can't compare it to that.
I risk my lips and bowels for this website and for what? A great cola? You bet'cha!
- Rating
- Categories
- Soda Pop
- Company
- Maine Root — Website — @maineroot
- Country
- United States
- Sweetener
- Organic Cane Juice
- Author
- Mike Literman on 5/15/12, 2:16 PM
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Blue Sky Organic New Century Cola
Earlier today Mike said that he could really go for a nice cola, and he noted that we don't really find too many “non-mainstream” colas. That got me thinking about cola all day, and I didn't think that I had any at home. When I got home later I perused my beverage shelf and discovered that I did have this can hiding in the back. Everything was coming up Milhouse.
Now I don't know what the difference is between this and their Natural Soda Cola. The ingredient lists look the same except this can says “organic cane juice” and the other says “ real sugar.” The order of the ingredients is different as well. This has natural cola nut flavor higher up on the list. I'm assuming they are pretty much the same drink though, except all of the ingredients in this can are organic. Regardless of the difference, the two things that really stand out about this cola over its everyday competitors is the fact that they do use cola nut and also it is caffeine free due to the company using natural ingredients. Neither Coke nor Pepsi use cola nut in their recipes. Instead they use some artificial concoction that they came up with to create a similar flavor. I must say that you can taste the difference, and this certainly tastes more natural and it's not harsh like the previously mentioned brands.
It may not be the best cola I have ever had, and it didn't quite live up to my expectations, but I certainly enjoyed it. If all of the colas in the world were organic this would probably fall somewhere in the middle of the road, but I prefer it over your common gas station alternatives.
Now I don't know what the difference is between this and their Natural Soda Cola. The ingredient lists look the same except this can says “organic cane juice” and the other says “ real sugar.” The order of the ingredients is different as well. This has natural cola nut flavor higher up on the list. I'm assuming they are pretty much the same drink though, except all of the ingredients in this can are organic. Regardless of the difference, the two things that really stand out about this cola over its everyday competitors is the fact that they do use cola nut and also it is caffeine free due to the company using natural ingredients. Neither Coke nor Pepsi use cola nut in their recipes. Instead they use some artificial concoction that they came up with to create a similar flavor. I must say that you can taste the difference, and this certainly tastes more natural and it's not harsh like the previously mentioned brands.
It may not be the best cola I have ever had, and it didn't quite live up to my expectations, but I certainly enjoyed it. If all of the colas in the world were organic this would probably fall somewhere in the middle of the road, but I prefer it over your common gas station alternatives.
- Rating
- Categories
- Soda Pop
- Company
- Blue Sky — Website — @blueskysoda
- Country
- United States
- Sweetener
- Organic Cane Juice
- Author
- Jason Draper on 5/14/12, 9:25 PM
- Buy It Amazon.com
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So Lieau Natural Weight Loss Water Mixed Berry Flavor
I think it's safe to say that 95% of the people in America wished they were in better shape. From the slob couch potatoes whose idea of exercise is reaching for the remote to folks who spend a good deal of their time at the gym, everyone would like to improve themselves. It's natural. People are supposed to be active. Companies know this is how people feel and they play to it. Why do you think there are so many “diet' drinks out on the market? So L'eau took it a step further. They didn't settle for a drink that had less calories and fake sugar. They went out and created a natural body supplement (I have no idea what it is) that actually aids in weight loss. The bottle says they ran studies with this supplement and the woman who took it lost significantly more weight than those who did not. After that success they produced their supplement in drink form. It basically tastes like Vitamin Water Zero, as both are flavored waters that use Erythritol as a sweetener. This bottle is supposed to be mixed berry, and it has a subtle berry flavor to it, but unfortunately the main flavor is the zero calorie sweetener, and it just gets stronger with each sip. You might think, “Well that's not that bad, I'll deal with the flavor if it will help me lose weight.” The rub is that in their study the woman who used the supplement had enough to equal three bottles of this daily for 8-weeks and still did a bunch of exercise. It's not a magical cure all, but it apparently does help a little. You just have to drink a buttload of it.
- Rating
- Categories
- Sports/Dietary Supplement, Water and Diet
- Company
- So Lieau
- Country
- United States
- Sweetener
- Erythritol
- Author
- Jason Draper on 5/14/12, 6:49 PM
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Cintron Grapeade
All morning for no reason in particular we were talking about The Chapelle Show and how great it was. It seriously came out of nowhere and we talked about it for an hour. It was a wonderful three seasons that ended too soon.
I knew I had some "purple drink" down in my pile so I picked it out, refrigerated it, and here we are. I know the "purple drink" he's referring to and that is not great. It's like that age-old discussion that you have with friends about if Skittles taste different because it's like 49% water, 50% sugar, and 1% flavoring. I never, not even as a kid, like "_________ Flavored Drink" because it's a bad imitation of an imitation. This drink is only one tier deep so it's closer to what an actual grape tastes like but still, not what grapes taste like. It sweet, it's juice, it's purple. That seems to be all it takes to pass the grape exam. This isn't terrible, though. It's absolutely drinkable and after a nice long lunch walk with "work dudes," it's just what I needed.
I knew I had some "purple drink" down in my pile so I picked it out, refrigerated it, and here we are. I know the "purple drink" he's referring to and that is not great. It's like that age-old discussion that you have with friends about if Skittles taste different because it's like 49% water, 50% sugar, and 1% flavoring. I never, not even as a kid, like "_________ Flavored Drink" because it's a bad imitation of an imitation. This drink is only one tier deep so it's closer to what an actual grape tastes like but still, not what grapes taste like. It sweet, it's juice, it's purple. That seems to be all it takes to pass the grape exam. This isn't terrible, though. It's absolutely drinkable and after a nice long lunch walk with "work dudes," it's just what I needed.
- Rating
- Categories
- Juice
- Company
- Cintron — Website — @cintronenergy
- Country
- United States
- Sweetener
- High Fructose Corn Syrup
- Author
- Mike Literman on 5/14/12, 3:12 PM
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Arizona Golden Bear Lemonade Honey Ginseng
I don't know if you've noticed but the weather has been getting increasingly better out there. By "out there" I mean outside not "out there in whatever location Call Of Duty" is in. I was like you, indoor kids. I loved playing video games and I still do. If I could do whatever I wanted, I might take a week off of work, pay for all my friends to take a week off of work, and just play video games for a week straight. Inside. No sun. Since this is the real world and I'm not what you consider "privileged," I do not have that luxury so I have things like "work" and "a kid" and "previous obligations" that I need to take care of. Here's what I'm getting at. When the weather gets nice, lemonade tastes better. Sure, you can drink it year 'round but in the summer lemonade is a thing that is earned.
This lemonade, fresh and new to shelves (almost) everywhere, isn't bad. Oh you see that there is honey and ginseng on the can, the two ingredients that made Arizona what it is today if you ask me, but you wouldn't know it by drinking this. It just tastes like lemonade. If I had an Arizona lemonade, a product that does not exist, and this lemonade with it's additional ingredients, I might say that this has less of an edge. That might be where the honey comes in but you can't taste it as a flavor, only as an effect. Ginseng, well let's face it. You didn't taste it in the green tea, either. It's great that it's there. Probably not noticeable that it's not there.
I'm happy that this exists because it's a nice change and a better product than the Arnold Palmer. Yeah, I said it. That in itself should be worth a thousand words.
This lemonade, fresh and new to shelves (almost) everywhere, isn't bad. Oh you see that there is honey and ginseng on the can, the two ingredients that made Arizona what it is today if you ask me, but you wouldn't know it by drinking this. It just tastes like lemonade. If I had an Arizona lemonade, a product that does not exist, and this lemonade with it's additional ingredients, I might say that this has less of an edge. That might be where the honey comes in but you can't taste it as a flavor, only as an effect. Ginseng, well let's face it. You didn't taste it in the green tea, either. It's great that it's there. Probably not noticeable that it's not there.
I'm happy that this exists because it's a nice change and a better product than the Arnold Palmer. Yeah, I said it. That in itself should be worth a thousand words.
- Rating
- Categories
- Lemonade
- Company
- Arizona — Website — @DrinkAriZona
- Country
- United States
- Sweetener
- High Fructose Corn Syrup
- Author
- Mike Literman on 5/12/12, 10:35 PM
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Joe Tea Raspberry Tea & Lemonade
I can only imagine how sticky the bed of that truck has to be. Driving bottles of iced tea and lemonade all over every day, every week, every month of the year bottles have to break. You also can tell that they do most of their driving on old dirt roads with dust blowing up everywhere. I bet the bed of that there truck is a dirty sticky mess. You know who is winning out with this ice tea leakage? The ants and bees, that's who. The ants are crawling their way up the tires, while the bees just buzz over to feed on the sweetness that is left behind once the glass is cleared away. Those lucky bugs are filling up their stomachs with some of the tastiest summer beverages available in the northeast. When one of these bottles of raspberry tea lemonade busts open it must be like a holiday to them. To start off the raspberry tea is great. Each swig tastes like you sitting on the back of that truck downing a bushel of ripe raspberries while gulping down a big jug of sweetened iced tea to fight the heat. If that tea wasn't enough for you, you are in luck because they cut it right in half with some quality lemonade. It was one a bit on the bitter side, but the sweetness of the tea took care of that and the two flavors now live in perfect harmony, well that is until the ants and bees come along and eat/drink it all up.
- Rating
- Country
- United States
- Sweetener
- Cane Sugar
- Author
- Jason Draper on 5/12/12, 6:03 PM
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Noble Old Fashioned Lemonade
For centuries pre-teens all over the world have been posing as scientists trying to perfect the perfect lemonade to sell at the roadside. To be honest most of them just half ass it and use a mix, or have their parents make it for them. If it's the latter you should probably consider yourself lucky. Those kids make terrible scientists. Their lemonade is either too watered down, way overly sweetened or is so sour that it makes it hard to drink. Still society dictates that you must pay the child with a smile and drink the entire cup. If you think for a second of not doing that, just remember what happened to Larry David. Not a pretty...pretty…β¬Β¦pre-tty sight.
I'd like to think that four generations ago a member of the Roe family (they make this product) was just another one of those kids trying to make some scratch for a Coke and some comics. That child's lemonade started off terrible, but unlike most they stuck with it and kept improving on it. Now that decades have passed I sit here with their current version and I say to them “stop, you have struck gold.” This is one of the best lemonades I have ever tasted. Most importantly it is made with organic lemon juice and not a powder. Second most important is that they chose to sweeten it with both cane juice and agave nectar. It's a match made in heaven. The sweeteners leave the drink sour, but not so much that it would upset our stomach and make you want to put down your glass. In fact, it's so perfect that you don't want to put down your “glass” at all. Before I knew it my entire bottle was gone and I was left for want of more. It's perfect. Now if only the kids in my neighborhood could make this caliber of lemonade.
I'd like to think that four generations ago a member of the Roe family (they make this product) was just another one of those kids trying to make some scratch for a Coke and some comics. That child's lemonade started off terrible, but unlike most they stuck with it and kept improving on it. Now that decades have passed I sit here with their current version and I say to them “stop, you have struck gold.” This is one of the best lemonades I have ever tasted. Most importantly it is made with organic lemon juice and not a powder. Second most important is that they chose to sweeten it with both cane juice and agave nectar. It's a match made in heaven. The sweeteners leave the drink sour, but not so much that it would upset our stomach and make you want to put down your glass. In fact, it's so perfect that you don't want to put down your “glass” at all. Before I knew it my entire bottle was gone and I was left for want of more. It's perfect. Now if only the kids in my neighborhood could make this caliber of lemonade.
- Rating
- Categories
- Lemonade
- Company
- Noble — Website — @NobleJuice
- Country
- United States
- Sweetener
- Organic Evaporated Cane Juice
- Author
- Jason Draper on 5/11/12, 5:21 PM
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Big Shot Cola
Mark was a magician. He loved what he did. He went to kid's parties and made kids float, did card tricks, and made birds and bunnies come out of everything. He was pretty good and was always interested in something bigger and better. Sure, he idolized David Copperfield, who didn't in the industry, but he was realistic. David Copperfield is the Michael Jordan of magic. At the end of every kid's party, he always plays 52 Pickup. The kids love it because all the cards are in the air and they yell and they scream. Magic takes a lot out of a man. He's got to clean up all that bird poop, rabbit poop, cards, and smoke powder. After a show, he likes to go to the store and get something to drink. He went to a corner store and grabbed some random cola. He looked at the bottle and smiled because the "Big Shot" guy was chewing on a cigar and he could just hear his voice. He laughed and opened the door and bumped into someone. He looked up to apologize and it was David Blaine. He was speechless. He didn't know what to say. He put his hand out to shake his hand while muttering, "My name is Mark. I'm a magician and a huge fan." David thanked him and asked him for some of his pop because he left his wallet in the RV. Mark gave him the whole, unopened bottle and told him to keep it. David opened it and took a big chug. Then he made a face. He told Mark that it was some of the worst cola he had ever had. It just tasted bland and generic. No body and nothing special. He said he could have bought a Pepsi and been more satisfied. Then he made the bottle disappear with a poof of smoke and went back to the RV.
Mark sat in the car for at least ten minutes just pondering what had just happened. He met David Blaine, but gave him the worst cola he had ever had. He didn't know whether to mark that as an accomplishment or not. Either way, he continued to do magic at kids parties and had one spectacular story to tell people in the Magician's Guild gatherings at Denny's.
Mark sat in the car for at least ten minutes just pondering what had just happened. He met David Blaine, but gave him the worst cola he had ever had. He didn't know whether to mark that as an accomplishment or not. Either way, he continued to do magic at kids parties and had one spectacular story to tell people in the Magician's Guild gatherings at Denny's.
- Rating
- Categories
- Soda Pop
- Country
- United States
- Sweetener
- High Fructose Corn Syrup
- Author
- Mike Literman on 5/11/12, 11:38 AM
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The Simpsons Energy Drink Flaming Moe
For most of my life if I were asked whom my favorite Simpsons' character was I would answer Kirk Van Houten without skipping a beat. Milhouse's dad is absolutely hilarious in his desperation and defeat. Very few things are funnier to me that “weekend dad” who got fired from a cracker factory. Okay scratch that, I just thought of something funnier and that would be Kirk wanting to know the school cafeteria's menus in advance because he doesn't like the idea of Milhouse eating two spaghetti meals in one day. Now that is genius humor.
Last year that all changed when I decided to rewatch every episode (basically) in order. While I still love Kirk, I realized that Moe Syzlak is the shining star of the show. As the seasons rolled by he went from being a surly bartender to one of the most despicable pieces of human garbage to ever grace the animated screen and I love him for it. From trafficking black market whales to trying to steal “Midge” away from Homer, nothing but hysterics come from his performances. Over the months of rewatching the show my love of Moe grew and grew.
Last week friend of Thirsty Dudes, Tony Flaminio went down to Florida for his grandfather's 90th birthday. He took a break in being day-drunk to head to Universal Studios and go on the Simpsons' ride where he bought me this energy drink. When he finally got back to Buffalo and gave it to me I couldn't stop giggling for a while. For those of you who are not aware The Flaming Moe is a drink that Senior Syzlak ripped off of Homer that is composed of a mix of every type of leftover liquor and some kids cough syrup (hysterical in it's own right). It's a great episode and the fact that someone made a drink with its name is just plain great.
I shot a video review for it, but decided not to put it up, because it was dumb and a let down. You see in the show the secret to the Flaming Moe is that it's a decent drink, but once you light it on fire it becomes amazing. Obviously I needed to see if the same was true for this drink. I took a sip, instantly remarked how it didn't taste like Red Bull at all, like most memorabilia energy drinks do, and that instead it tasted like berries. I later found out that it is supposed to be bubble gum flavored, but I didn't taste that for even a second. So I took my sip, then poured it into a glass and tried to ignite it. Not only did it not light, but also whenever the flame got close to it (not touching it) it went out. It was expected, but it was also a let down. I really wanted it to go up in flames and then acquire a different flavor. I guess not containing alcohol or cough syrup will suppress the flammability of a fluid. The drink did taste better than I expected it to, but since it's a “special” energy drink the price tag was a bit hefty, so I wouldn't drink it on the regular even if we did have it available in Buffalo. Still, the idea is hilarious.
Remember he was born a snake handler and he'll die a snake handler.
Last year that all changed when I decided to rewatch every episode (basically) in order. While I still love Kirk, I realized that Moe Syzlak is the shining star of the show. As the seasons rolled by he went from being a surly bartender to one of the most despicable pieces of human garbage to ever grace the animated screen and I love him for it. From trafficking black market whales to trying to steal “Midge” away from Homer, nothing but hysterics come from his performances. Over the months of rewatching the show my love of Moe grew and grew.
Last week friend of Thirsty Dudes, Tony Flaminio went down to Florida for his grandfather's 90th birthday. He took a break in being day-drunk to head to Universal Studios and go on the Simpsons' ride where he bought me this energy drink. When he finally got back to Buffalo and gave it to me I couldn't stop giggling for a while. For those of you who are not aware The Flaming Moe is a drink that Senior Syzlak ripped off of Homer that is composed of a mix of every type of leftover liquor and some kids cough syrup (hysterical in it's own right). It's a great episode and the fact that someone made a drink with its name is just plain great.
I shot a video review for it, but decided not to put it up, because it was dumb and a let down. You see in the show the secret to the Flaming Moe is that it's a decent drink, but once you light it on fire it becomes amazing. Obviously I needed to see if the same was true for this drink. I took a sip, instantly remarked how it didn't taste like Red Bull at all, like most memorabilia energy drinks do, and that instead it tasted like berries. I later found out that it is supposed to be bubble gum flavored, but I didn't taste that for even a second. So I took my sip, then poured it into a glass and tried to ignite it. Not only did it not light, but also whenever the flame got close to it (not touching it) it went out. It was expected, but it was also a let down. I really wanted it to go up in flames and then acquire a different flavor. I guess not containing alcohol or cough syrup will suppress the flammability of a fluid. The drink did taste better than I expected it to, but since it's a “special” energy drink the price tag was a bit hefty, so I wouldn't drink it on the regular even if we did have it available in Buffalo. Still, the idea is hilarious.
Remember he was born a snake handler and he'll die a snake handler.
- Rating
- Categories
- Energy Drink
- Company
- The Simpsons — Website
- Country
- United States
- Sweetener
- High Fructose Corn Syrup
- Author
- Jason Draper on 5/10/12, 6:14 PM
- Buy It Amazon.com
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Oregon Chai Herbal Chai Dreamscape
There is a video game that you should know about called "Trials HD." I have easily invested hundreds of hours playing it. It's a simple motorcycle game where you accelerate, brake, and lean your way to the end as quickly as possible. There is a level in it called "Dreamscape" that is all over the place. Ramping up and down through someone's crazy imagination with floating planks, scaffolding, and twisted wood. You can see what I'm talking about here.
This drink is the liquid equivalent of that track. I've made a few mugs of this before and liked it, but preferred "the original" variety. After drinking it today, I might change. It's so spicy. It's almost woody and peppery. If you like light drinks, you couldn't drive your car away from this drink fast enough. It's a lingering drink, too. So spicy. It caught me off guard because I didn't know that it was going to be so bold. If you're in the market for a change and need to pull a total 180, this is the place to go. Oooh. So spicy.
This drink is the liquid equivalent of that track. I've made a few mugs of this before and liked it, but preferred "the original" variety. After drinking it today, I might change. It's so spicy. It's almost woody and peppery. If you like light drinks, you couldn't drive your car away from this drink fast enough. It's a lingering drink, too. So spicy. It caught me off guard because I didn't know that it was going to be so bold. If you're in the market for a change and need to pull a total 180, this is the place to go. Oooh. So spicy.
- Rating
- Categories
- Relaxation and Hot Tea
- Company
- Oregon Chai — Website — @oregonchai
- Country
- United States
- Sweetener
- No Sugar Added
- Author
- Mike Literman on 5/10/12, 9:49 AM
- Buy It Amazon.com
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Snapple All Natural Lightly Sweetened Cherry Pomegranate
These are dangerous times guys, dangerous times. They are dangerous times to be a small company because large companies are getting smarter and making some awesome products. Snapple, in my eyes, was long forgotten for a long time and then in the last couple years they ramped it up and now make delicious tea. That's why it drives me crazy when I see small companies using garbage ingredients. You know that Snapple could make way more if it used worse ingredients but there is someone digging their feet in ensuring that doesn't happen.
This tea is pretty great. I've been doing this for long enough to know different varieties of tea and flavoring. This is a lightly sweetened (both as advertised and as practiced) white tea. It's good. I would like it if this was just that: simple, efficient, and beautiful. I've never had just a plain sweet white tea. It would be fantastic. You hear me, Snapple? I'll buy it. Cherry is a rarity in tea but pomegranate is a bit old hat. The pomegranate in this is good, but it might be about 33% of the fruit. Cherry takes the majority, a majority I'm calling 66%, and is right on the cusp. It's a dangerous line that it walks because sometimes people think that cherry tastes mediciny but this is not at that rate. It's good. White tea plus cherry plus pomegranate is a good mix. Let it be known.
Snapple, you've done good work. You made something new and I've got to give you credit because it was a fantastic implementation.
This tea is pretty great. I've been doing this for long enough to know different varieties of tea and flavoring. This is a lightly sweetened (both as advertised and as practiced) white tea. It's good. I would like it if this was just that: simple, efficient, and beautiful. I've never had just a plain sweet white tea. It would be fantastic. You hear me, Snapple? I'll buy it. Cherry is a rarity in tea but pomegranate is a bit old hat. The pomegranate in this is good, but it might be about 33% of the fruit. Cherry takes the majority, a majority I'm calling 66%, and is right on the cusp. It's a dangerous line that it walks because sometimes people think that cherry tastes mediciny but this is not at that rate. It's good. White tea plus cherry plus pomegranate is a good mix. Let it be known.
Snapple, you've done good work. You made something new and I've got to give you credit because it was a fantastic implementation.
- Rating
- Categories
- Iced Tea
- Country
- United States
- Sweetener
- Sugar
- Author
- Mike Literman on 5/9/12, 3:42 PM
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Mmm...Tea Co. Black Tea Honey Lemon
Karen was a stupid idiot. She was one of those people who always said, "I could make this better at home." when she ate or drank things. It was annoying to spend any amount of time with her because it was almost certain she would utter it. One thing that made it more annoying was that she was not a fantastic cook, or baker, so every time she said it, you would flashback to the time she said, "Oh, remember that time we had that meal at that restaurant? Well I made it and it was way better." and it sucked. No offense to Karen, but she was an excellent banker but a terrible copycat when it came to food.
She went to the store and bought a bottle of Mmm...Tea's black tea, honey, and lemon tea and brought it home. She took a sip and thought, obviously, that she could make it better at home. She thought the tea was a bit bitter but did have an honest, lemon and honey taste. The actual slice of lemon in the bottle probably helped a bit. She brewed some black tea, bought some honey in a bear container as she thought that was the pinnacle of honey manufacturing, and a lemon. She mixed everything up, and threw it in the fridge for a couple hours. She took it out, poured it into a glass, and for the first time made something that was actually better than the original.
Congratulations, Karen. Enjoy your success until the next time you try and make something better than the original.
She went to the store and bought a bottle of Mmm...Tea's black tea, honey, and lemon tea and brought it home. She took a sip and thought, obviously, that she could make it better at home. She thought the tea was a bit bitter but did have an honest, lemon and honey taste. The actual slice of lemon in the bottle probably helped a bit. She brewed some black tea, bought some honey in a bear container as she thought that was the pinnacle of honey manufacturing, and a lemon. She mixed everything up, and threw it in the fridge for a couple hours. She took it out, poured it into a glass, and for the first time made something that was actually better than the original.
Congratulations, Karen. Enjoy your success until the next time you try and make something better than the original.
- Rating
- Categories
- Iced Tea
- Company
- Mmm...Tea Co.
- Country
- United States
- Sweetener
- Honey
- Author
- Mike Literman on 5/8/12, 12:10 PM
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Vita Lina Flaxseed Drink Mango
Something happened around the turn of the century where people started to give up on bars of soap. Suddenly they weren't good enough for people. Maybe people thought they couldn't get them clean enough or something, either way people left the bars on the shelf and America embraced the new product known as body wash. I am a grown ass man and I will confidently admit that I use body wash. The reason I do is that I have some that smells like red licorice and the aroma is delicious. That really plays no part in this tale though. The important thing here is that the body wash empire got greedy. They were blinded by the new trend and in their minds the entire world would soon turn to their products and bar soap would become obsolete. As a result many of them purchased the ingredients needed to make the wash in obscene surplus. Now that a decade has passed the body wash folk are realizing that they have reached their limit of customers. Those who are not already using their products will cling to their bars of soap until the day they die. The problem was they were stuck with enough warehouses of materials to fill a smaller state, like Rhode Island. Sure they were able to sell the “soap” ingredients to some of the bar companies at a loss, but what to do with the “gel” ingredients? After many late night board meetings a solution was thought up; they would sell the ingredient, which are perfectly safe to consume, to the beverage industry to make drinks with interesting textures.
Vita Lina jumped at the chance to ride the crest of a possible trend of drinks with strange consistencies. They released this line of flaxseed drinks that has a viscosity that falls somewhere between body wash and a normal drink. It doesn't taste soapy in any way, but the texture is there, and it's weird. I personally like it a lot. It's interesting, and I notice that I take smaller sips than normal. A few friends who tried it were not so into it. They couldn't get past the texture to even contemplate the flavor, which has a nice subtle mango quality to it. I can't blame them. Even though I like the consistency, I do find it distracting from the flavor. I feel like I can taste texture in this drink, and since I'm not a robot that is impossible. It says it's a drink, but since there is tea in it, I consider it an iced tea. Truth be told it tastes more like a drink that is not overly sweetened than tea.
Vita Lina jumped at the chance to ride the crest of a possible trend of drinks with strange consistencies. They released this line of flaxseed drinks that has a viscosity that falls somewhere between body wash and a normal drink. It doesn't taste soapy in any way, but the texture is there, and it's weird. I personally like it a lot. It's interesting, and I notice that I take smaller sips than normal. A few friends who tried it were not so into it. They couldn't get past the texture to even contemplate the flavor, which has a nice subtle mango quality to it. I can't blame them. Even though I like the consistency, I do find it distracting from the flavor. I feel like I can taste texture in this drink, and since I'm not a robot that is impossible. It says it's a drink, but since there is tea in it, I consider it an iced tea. Truth be told it tastes more like a drink that is not overly sweetened than tea.
- Rating
- Categories
- Juice, Other/Weird and Iced Tea
- Company
- Vita Lina
- Country
- United States
- Sweetener
- Cane Sugar
- Author
- Jason Draper on 5/7/12, 8:24 PM
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Solixir Relax Blackberry Chamomile
For the first time ever I will now claim that scientists don't know what they are talking about. Sure they know the answers to pretty much about everything, but when it comes to the sun, they have it all wrong. I don't know where they got all of this malarkey about the Earth spinning and revolving around the sun at the same time. It's pretty obvious to every single person with the sense of sight that the Earth sits still and the sun moves in regard to us. All you have to do to know that is the truth is to look up at the sky.
I can even explain why the sun moves the way it does. It's simple actually, being the sun is a lot of work and requires a lot of energy. After awhile the sun just gets tired. Literally the sun gets exhausted and needs to take a rest. The sun's parents didn't raise a fool, so our friend in the sky has manners. He knows that it would be rude to just turn off his flames and take a nap where everyone can see him, so he goes off and hides on us and takes comfort in slumber.
I guess I wasn't completely correct when I said that all scientists were wrong earlier. There is a small faction that work for the Solixir company who know what the deal is. They have known for a while how the sun works and have devised a way to harness all forms of its power. They had a team go up to the sun in this crazy fire proof/heat resistant suits to collect both it's daytime energy and the anti-energy the sun uses to help it to relax and fall asleep (aka the sun's sleeping pills). They used these samples to synthesize the way the sun works and have used it in their functionality beverages.
The drink I have in my hand is one that harnesses the relaxation power of the sleeping sun. The thing is that they don't want other companies mimicking their discovery, so they don't just come out and list “the relaxing properties of the nighttime sun” on the ingredients list. Instead they just list the other things in this beverage: chamomile flower, passionflower herb, lemon balm, jejube berry and hibiscus flower. They lightly flavored this mixture with blackberry juice and added some carbonated water to create a nice little product. The botanical blend kind of gives off a slight fennel taste, but it's more like a memory of a fennel flavor. Overall the entire drink tastes very light. There is no sweetener in it and it tastes more like a flavored sparkling water. Knowing the potential power of this drink Solixir did the responsible thing and only put the smallest traces of the sun's power in the drink. They didn't want people just passing out everywhere as soon as they took a sip. In fact the drink doesn't make you tired at all, it simply relaxes you and let's you enjoy the day as the sun flies by overhead.
I can even explain why the sun moves the way it does. It's simple actually, being the sun is a lot of work and requires a lot of energy. After awhile the sun just gets tired. Literally the sun gets exhausted and needs to take a rest. The sun's parents didn't raise a fool, so our friend in the sky has manners. He knows that it would be rude to just turn off his flames and take a nap where everyone can see him, so he goes off and hides on us and takes comfort in slumber.
I guess I wasn't completely correct when I said that all scientists were wrong earlier. There is a small faction that work for the Solixir company who know what the deal is. They have known for a while how the sun works and have devised a way to harness all forms of its power. They had a team go up to the sun in this crazy fire proof/heat resistant suits to collect both it's daytime energy and the anti-energy the sun uses to help it to relax and fall asleep (aka the sun's sleeping pills). They used these samples to synthesize the way the sun works and have used it in their functionality beverages.
The drink I have in my hand is one that harnesses the relaxation power of the sleeping sun. The thing is that they don't want other companies mimicking their discovery, so they don't just come out and list “the relaxing properties of the nighttime sun” on the ingredients list. Instead they just list the other things in this beverage: chamomile flower, passionflower herb, lemon balm, jejube berry and hibiscus flower. They lightly flavored this mixture with blackberry juice and added some carbonated water to create a nice little product. The botanical blend kind of gives off a slight fennel taste, but it's more like a memory of a fennel flavor. Overall the entire drink tastes very light. There is no sweetener in it and it tastes more like a flavored sparkling water. Knowing the potential power of this drink Solixir did the responsible thing and only put the smallest traces of the sun's power in the drink. They didn't want people just passing out everywhere as soon as they took a sip. In fact the drink doesn't make you tired at all, it simply relaxes you and let's you enjoy the day as the sun flies by overhead.
- Rating
- Categories
- Sports/Dietary Supplement and Relaxation
- Country
- United States
- Sweetener
- No Sugar Added
- Author
- Jason Draper on 5/7/12, 5:03 PM
- Buy It Amazon.com
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