Juice - 935 Reviews

In the dizzying haze of strobe lights a giant of an old man's face flashes in and out of the darkness repeating the words, “Something's wrong.” Even though that horror occurred years ago in a bowling alley, the sight was fresh in my mind as I took a sip of this juice. One of the numerous ingredients in here that are not mango left a wrong flavor to this. As soon as it hits your tongue you are greeted with mango, but nearly instantly some rouge shadow pushes the great fruit out of the way and blocks the doorway to proper flavor. On top of that the pulp in this are little cubes of mango that don't have a long shelf life floating in juice and other delicacies. The way they squish in your mouth gives the illusion that they are rotting. Knowing that they are not does not help the voyage. SOS, this ship is going down.

I'm familiar with the Sambazon organic energy drink line, and I can honestly say that I am a fan. They provide healthier energy in a world full of chemical pick me ups. I had no idea this company made any other drinks until I stumbled upon this in the grocery store yesterday. If you know me, you more than likely know that the word ginger in relation to food is like the bell to Pavlov's dogs (no matter what anyone tells you, I am not a ginger as a person). If I'm at a restaurant and someone is labeled as ginger flavored, that's what I get. If a beverage has real ginger in it, it's going to end up in my belly. Needless to say this instantly went into my cart, and I couldn't wait until the morning to drink it.

This is the single best prepackaged smoothie I have ever tasted. It just tastes healthy in all the right ways. It has a decent ginger taste, that lacks in a burn, but who really wants a smoothie with a burn to it? Okay I probably would, but I have no problem with it lacking in this beverage. There is a small assortment of fruits in this smoothie, that all blend together nicely (yes there is banana in it, and no you can not taste it, thank goodness). The real star of this beverage is the Amazing Grass Super Greens. It's what Sambazon has labeled their concoction of wheat grass, barley grass, alfalfa, spirulina, chlorella and the mighty kale. They are mixed in with the rest of the ingredients in a way that you can taste them, but they don't leave any of the aftertastes that they normally would.

I could drink this by the gallon, but at $3.50 for a 10.5oz bottle I'll have to get it as a treat for myself. It tastes like a fresh juice smoothie that you would get at a fancy juice place like Fresh in Toronto. Now there is a great little place. Man, I'm done with this, and I want to drive to the store to buy another dozen bottles. This could get dangerous, but at least it's mega healthy.

Alright Michael, you've been working here at Izze for a couple of weeks now. I still think you're kind of a dunce, but lucky for you this job doesn't require much brains. Today you'll be making the sparkling lime soda while I make the more delicate birch beer. Remember we don't add sweeteners to our beverages, so don't bother asking me where the sugar is like you have every other day this week. Wait…€¦STOP! What are you doing? Where did you even get those little squirt bottles of limejuice? Did you have those hidden all over your person? You are just strange. Yes this is a lime soda that you're making, but that doesn't mean it's straight up carbonated limejuice. You just used three of those little plastic lime's worth of juice to make one bottle of soda. Do you seriously think anyone could drink that entire bottle? Oh you do, do ya? Well go for it. That's right, now take that sourpuss face of yours and get back to your station. We mix together mostly apple and grape juice with a bit of lime to make this soda palatable. You still get a mostly lime flavor, but the sweetness from the other fruits fights the tartness of the limes in the bet possible way. It ends up being like an apple-lime juice. You don't really notice the grape. Oh you think people will like your way better? Well we have orders for about 500 cases of my recipe and you couldn't even drink two sips of yours, so somehow I think your wrong. Just go to the washout station and clean up everything that is in your field of vision. I don't want to see you again until the end of the day. I swear a trained pig would do a better job at this than you.

It is a little known fact that in Italy volcanoes reign supreme. Many know that such practices occur in places such as Indonesia, but for centuries the denizens of “The Boot” have kept their rituals a secret. I'm about to blow up their spot in a major way.

I'm going to go ahead and ruin everyone's fun right away; they don't perform human sacrifices. I mean they aren't savages. They aren't trying to over throw the world. They are just looking to help their crops, by appeasing to some old gods. You might find yourself asking why has it been kept such a tight-lipped secret for all this time. It's simple actually, with the Vatican basically in their back yard; you don't really want to upset the Holy See with what they would see as false worship. Basically if the church blacklists you, your tourist trade goes in the turlet.

Back to the important garbage: The main item that is sacrificed to the volcano gods is blood oranges. You know how gods are all into symbolism, well they like to pretend that the juice of the blood orange is actually human blood, like the old days. Gross. The Italians may not be savages, but the gods really wished they were. Some people just throw bushels of oranges into the fiery depths, but others believe that the gods prefer you to take the time with your sacrifice and juice it. I mean, what's more impressive: a tiny body, or a big jug of blood?

Dream Foods started pilfering from their sacrifices in order to sell the deliciousness to the public outside of the country. With a mixture of three different varieties of blood oranges with no sugar added, how can you go wrong? It tastes like a mix between a sweet orange and a grapefruit. It's glorious. Once you get a taste, you'll never want to go back to plain orange juice again. Don't let the name fool you though. This is not an Italian soda; it's not carbonated. It is straight up juice meant for a sacrifice. By drinking it you may be taking away from fields of rigatoni and penne, that would feed a nation, but hell, I think it's worth it.

There's sugar in grapefruit, right? I mean I buy juices with no added sweeteners and there's always a decent amount of sugar in the juice, just from the fruit. The internet tells me that grapefruit has sugar, which makes sense, it's a fruit. According to Google half of a large grapefruit has 11.59g of sugar in it. So does Rob's somehow remove that sugar and replace it with erythritol, because the label on this clearly says there are zero grams of sugar. That would be some wacky science that just doesn't seem worth it.

I don't know how Rob's makes this, but this is tasty. It has the essence of grapefruit flavor without the extreme tartness. Sure it has a zero calorie sweetener in it, but it doesn't have a gross diet taste. I think the grapefruit flavor balanced it out nicely. My real question is was the erythritol really needed? Was it just used to round off the tartness? Only Rob knows and he's not talking. He's too busy with his Pirate's Booty (seriously one man, two great products. I'd give him a high five).

Cucumber, eh. I'll try it. Zero, eh. Alright. I don't hate Stevia and/or equivalents. Together at last? We'll see about that. After some scientific discovery, I have come up with the following conclusions. This starts off well. It's promising. It smells like cucumber and tastes like cucumber until...oh...there it is, the badness. It's overly sweet. Too sweet, even. It's that fake sweetener "too sweet" where it's sweet and cold at the same time.

Remember when you were in your freshman year of college and there was that adorable little girl that, for some reason, liked you? She was like five foot naught and somehow, without access to a legitimate kitchen, would make you cookies and cupcakes but out of the genuine sweetness of her heart and not because cupcakes are "cool" and a fad. She makes them because she wants to be noticed. She is truly sweet and was probably unfortunately taken by some dirtbag on the lacrosse team who just didn't treat her right. That simile is not like this drink. The simile to this drink is the girl you ended up with for six unfortunate days that loved light beer and was not shy to show a little too much skin and was a bit of a floozy. You knew that you made a mistake. She never made you sweets but she once bought you a cake that she got from a college party that somehow was still in one piece but had a ridiculous amount of the world's worst frosting ever one it. That's this drink. Frat cake. Too sweet. Promising on paper but just too much.

Sometimes you date a girl who lives across the country and you go visit every other month. Sometimes things don't work out and you end up splitting up right before you leave from a visit. Sometimes your flight gets delayed and you turn around and said person is standing there asking if you want to get food. On top of that sometimes pizza and great soda can mend the relationship (for a couple more months at least).

Portland, OR's Hot Lips is a diamond in the rough. Well, not a diamond in a sea of bad food, as that city has obscene amounts of awesome veggie food (Vita Cafè I'm looking in your direction). It's a special place because it is a place where you can get a decent slice of pizza on the west coast. For the most part I don't even tough pizza past Wisconsin and even that is really pushing it. Hot Lips was great for its pizza, but even better for it's soda. They take local fruit and add sparkling water and a little cane sugar. If you've ever read Tom Robbins' “Still Life With Woodpecker” you know that blackberries run rampant in those parts. This is so simple and so wonderful. It tastes light lightly sugared blackberries, because that is exactly what it is. Why anyone would mess with a recipe like this boggles my mind. Okay, I understand that they want to save money, but they end up with a product that is not even close to this in quality, those big dummies.

I was always under the impression that this soda was only available in Portland, but my ladyfriend (of three years, not the previous ladyfriend which I mentioned above) found it in a health food store in North Carolina. I really hope Hot Lips expands their reach and takes over the country with their quality soda.

On our great Canadian drink adventure about a month ago Mike and I came across theses sodas in a Shoppers Drug Mart. I called dibs as quickly as I could because it's a soda with pineapple and passion fruit in it. I'm pretty sure that if Mike would have tried to grab it for his own I would have drug him out to the parking lot and we would have had to put up our dukes. The idea of Mike and I in fisticuffs is absolutely absurd. I can't even envision it in my head without the visions of us putting our fists up like an olde timey movie and erupting in laughter. Luckily, it never came to that, as Mike knows my taste buds and gave it up happily.

You might ask yourself, if I was so excited to an extent that I would have been willing to pummel one of my dearest friends, why did it take me a month to drink it. The answer is simple. The night was the first night of a tour I was on and Mike and my ladyfriend brought the drinks I purchased back home for me. This bottle was lost in the shuffle and it just resurfaced. What a glorious day it was.

All of my expectations of this drink were not only met, but they were surpassed. It's sparkling water, fruit juice and nothing else. The folks at Nativa were smart enough not to gunk up the mix by adding sugar. It tastes like some one blended up some pineapple and passion fruit, squeezed in a spritz of mango and strained out all the bits. Then they poured the remains into some sparkling water. The fruit itself is sweet enough to overcome any potential seltzer flavor. It's the perfect fruity soda. I've never had one that was better.

It turns out that this is the beverage version of an M Night Shyamalon movie. It turns out the soda has been dead the whole time. Wait, that's not right. It turns out that this wasn't made by some specialty soda company. Nativa is actually the Shoppers Drug Marts' store brand. Now that is true magic.

Fuze went a bit overboard and tried to mix ten million flavors together, and by ten million I mean six. There is a lot of text in this ingredients list and since most of it is fruit juice concentrate one would think that this would be a decent drink. Then you look at a different spot on the label and realize that there is only 5% juice in here. That's a lot of different juices to use to make a drink that is 95% other junk. It shows in the flavor too. It tastes thin and cheap. It tastes like generic fruit drink. These are not things that I look for in a beverage. This could have been in a giant gallon jug at a gas station and I would not have batted an eye. Okay, I would have because it isn't as thick as those beverages, but you get the idea. Sorry Fuze, you have not won me over with this one.

Deep in the heart of the rainforests of Canada the Black River flows. It is an anomaly of the country. Every fruit ever imaginable grows on the banks of this river. Who knew that tropical fruit could grow just north of Moosejaw, Saskatchewan? On the southern banks of the river is where the guava orchard exists. Unfortunately the ground isn't very suitable for this plant, so the fruit it bears is not as wonderful from that that grows in reality. The Canadians aren't ones to waste anything so they still decided to bottle the mediocre juice.

I wish that were the actual case, but the downfall of this juice is that it is more of a mixture of grape and apple juice than it is guava puree. The other juices take away from the exquisiteness that is guava. It's a shame for sure.

Every morning I get up, use the facilities, pour myself a bowl of store brand Cinnamon Toast Crunch with unsweetened almond milk and check the internets. It's a ritual that I need in my life. When I'm out of town I try to mimic it as best I can, and if my body is not satisfied, it's going to be a rough day. I need to change up this ritual a bit and add a glass of juice to it. How great is juice? It tastes great, and if you drink the right kind it can be great for you.

I decided to start this change today with this can of mango nectar. Unfortunately this isn't the healthiest of juice due to the unnecessarily added sugar. It's also only 25% juice. When a company brags that their juice is not from concentrate I feel like it should be 100% juice. Oh well.

Mangos and pineapple both have this weird thing where they occasionally smell vaguely like vomit. I don't know what causes it, and I don't know if anyone else has the same reaction as me. One would think that if something has that scent it would be absolutely disgusting, not me. I love both fruits and all their juices. This falls on the average side of mango juices. Sure it tastes like mango, but it doesn't taste like you just bit into the fruit, which is what I'm always looking for in a juice. I guess you shouldn't expect much when juice comes in a can.

First things first with a name like Chin Chin this makes me think that monkeys either make it or they serve it. I don't think I've ever watched or read anything with a monkey names Chin Chin, so I have no idea where this thought is coming from, but I just can't shake it.

If there is a monkey that makes this juice, he/she needs to step up their game. This is a decent enough juice, but most guava juices are through the roof good. This is just decent. It's just a bit more watered down than others and there is a tad too much sugar added for my liking. I urge someone who knows sign language to tell this chimp to fix these issues or else they will be shot into space. No one wants to be shot into space. It's scary there.

Holy crap I feel like I am going to puke. This drink...jeez louise. Just vomit. Gaaah. I can sum this drink up in a lovely simile. Did you, like me grow up biting your fingernails? Did your parents buy you that stuff that you put on your fingernails that made them taste disgusting? This is what that tastes like. Absurdly bitter. Oh it smells inviting but one sip and you are on the fast track to Hurlburg. Please add sugar to this next time. I honestly can't see anyone liking this. I appreciate 100% Juice when it's a good fruit at 100%. Grapefruit juice at 100% sucks.

Is it wrong of me to assume that when something is organic that it is just going to be solely what it is labeled as? I feel like ten years back that was the case, but not so much these days. I wanted there to be nothing in this bottle except for juices that came from mangos and oranges. Oh it would have been so delicious, perhaps a perfect drink. That is not what I received. While it still is better than 90% of the juices available to the world, there are other elements at work in this beverage that lessen its quality. Sure there are orange and mango juice in here, but right along side them, and in greater quantity according to the ingredient list, are their friends apple and grape. It's like orange and orange arranged this wonderful little get away together and then their two overbearing friends invited themselves along and rearranged the entire trip to suit their own needs. Jerks. What would have been the vacation of a lifetime ends up being more of an apple juice that is orange and mango flavored (grape got food poisoning and spent the weekend in bed). As I said I do really enjoy the drink a lot, and it's fairly unique tasting, but it's not what I was expecting, nor what I really wanted. Knowing what it is I think I would enjoy it a lot more in the future.

Come on baby slip off that rind, take off those pesky seeds and let's get down to business. No baby, don't be embarrassed, there is no need for you to cover yourself up with sugar. You're sweet enough as it is. You know I didn't think you'd be down for this, but I'm glad you brought your friends along. This is going to be quite a party. To tell you the truth I've never been with so many fruits at once before. Baby, this is the best birthday present you could have ever given me. You've invited the strawberries, apples, peaches and mangos to the party. I love your juice baby doll. Orange juice is a classic and a standard and I don't mean to put you down by saying that, but you know I have you all the time. When you mingle with all your friends you still shine brightly, along with the guavas and the mangos. The other fruits are just background in this party, and you three are all I see. You're thick in all the right ways and I wish I could partake in you all day and night, but I'm only a single person baby, and I need a break every now and then.

You know what's nice? Not having a urinary tract infection. I know that it goes without saying but once you've been through living at college, you learn a thing or two about them. Number one is that you can't drink cranberry juice without at least thinking of one. This drink reminded me of a urinary tract infection unfortunately but it doesn't hinder my opinion of it, as it was good. It was nothing special as it was just a cranberry juice, but it was nice. A juice is a wonderful thing when you spend all your time drinking pop and other things. That being said, I just read the back of this and there are 280 calories in it and now I'm upset that I drank the whole thing. I thought this would be healthier. I don't know why Mr. Welch used corn syrup but I think that I drank it fast enough that it was cool enough to still be enjoyable.

This is good. I could have stood to drink half of it but hey, what are you going to do now, right? Nothing. That's what.

Who needs seedless watermelons? I mean seriously. You're eating watermelon outside and you are almost encouraged to spit the seeds. I don't think I've ever eaten sliced watermelon inside. Sure, cubed watermelon as part of a fruit salad I've eaten inside, but the kind that looks like fruit pizza I think I've only eaten outside. I love the stuff. I love the seeds. There is something therapeutic about filling your mouth with seeds and machine gunning them out. Not at someone as that would be sticky, disrespectful, and pretty disgusting. Just shoot them for distance and for fun.

I'm pretty sure that the whole "If you eat the seeds you will grow a watermelon in your stomach." I think that anyone who has ever believed that was true has never had a garden a day in their lives. I would say that twenty-five percent of my annual garden just doesn't come to fruition due to poor soil, water, drainage, dogs, space, etc. It's hard to grow some things and you need optimal environment to grow a lot of things. You really think that a watermelon could germinate inside your acidic stomach filled with hamburger grease, pop, sugars, no sunlight, and no real nutrients. I mean, you could argue that it was like a composter but it's still far too dangerous for anything to sprout. So that's that.

So if you still aren't convinced that you don't not need seeds, this drink is for you. It's watermelon flavors, as it should be since it claims it is, but it's right in the middle of "real" watermelon and "candy" watermelon flavored. It's a tallboy and should be shared. No one should drink this in one sitting unless they love 300 garbage calories dedicated to a drink that doesn't fully taste like the fruit it represents. I think you could probably eat a whole watermelon for under 300 calories. I wouldn't recommend it as you body would have to go into some sort of fruit shock. That might just be called diarrhea, actually. Don't get me wrong, it's a good drink and is nice on overcast days like this to bring you back to a childhood summer, but for almost twenty-four ounces, this is gluttonous.

Plum flavored drinks are not something that you see too often. Well, outside of an Asian market, and the plum drinks you find there are entirely different beasts that you simply want nothing to do with. They tend to taste like smoked mold. They are perhaps the worst beverages I have ever tried. I couldn't even swallow a single sip.

Real plums are great though. I went to a flea market a few weeks back and the fruit vender was closing up so he sold me 10 plums for a dollar. It was a good couple of days. I miss those days. Rob's does a great job with this drink and it actually tastes like you juiced a plum (well and then added some erythritol). I can't think of any other drink I've had that tastes so much like a plum plucked out of nature. The sweetener isn't too over powering and it actually gives it that specific bubble tea flavor. That is a taste that I will always love.

Rob's knows what they are doing with drinks, especially diet drinks. Diet no longer means absolutely terrible in this day and age. With the amount of obesity in this country it couldn't have come sooner.

Since I don't watch Canadian television much I'm not sure if this has happened or not, but it really should. Picture this: a fade in with some synth bass and a drum machine playing in the background. The scene is young women's bedroom and she's laying in her bed wearing a ripped up shirt and way too much jewelry. As it pans in we realize that it's Madonna (well a 1986 Madonna look alike) and she's getting frustrated playing around with a keyboard and sheets of music and lyrics litter the room. She just can't seem to write her next big hit. She decides she needs to take a break so she goes over to the fridge and pulls out a bottle of juice. She takes a sip and inspiration hits her. Just like that. She runs over to her bed aka workstation with a big goofy grin and starts working feverishly. By the end she's playing along and singing with the song that has been playing in the background and just as it gets to the end of the chorus and she sings the line “True Blue baby I love you,” the camera zooms in on the now mostly finished bottle of juice on her nightstand. It doesn't get better than that ladies and gentlemen. You get one hell of a song, one hell of a drink and a nice 80's throwback that all the kids are raving about these days.

I know what you're thinking and yes I am available to write ads for you as well, just get a hold of my agent. Oh, that's not what you were thinking at all? You actually want to know what the juice tastes like? Well, it certainly tastes blue, with a little purple in the mix. You see True Blue went a bit out of their color spectrum and used grape juice as filler in this drink. You can really taste both the blue and blackberries in this, but the taste of grape is always lingering in the background. I have no problem with that uninvited little fruit. It's actually kind of nice. It's also not as sweet as you would expect it to be. There is still 29g of sugar in this, but it doesn't taste that sweet. It's always a nice treat to not have an overly sweetened juice. Oh and if you spill any of this on a carpet or a couch, forget about ever getting it out. This blue is true and is staining forever.

With the exception of grape soda are there any other purple colored drinks out there? I mean even grape juice is more of a dark red than purple. This on the other hand is very purple. It looks like it could be just juiced pickled beats (that would be gross). What is in the bottle you may ask? Well let me tell you, as Naked very thoughtfully puts a comprehensive list on their juices of what, and how many, items of produce their bottles contain. This has 6.5 strawberries, 15 sweet cherries, ¼ plum, 1/5 apple, 1 ½ purple carrots (ahh that's where the color comes from), 1/3 red beat (even more purple fun), 1/8 sweet potato, 91 kernels of sweet corn (so specific), 18 chick peas and a hint of lemon. That is a whole lot to be jammed into one little bottle. As a result this is nothing but healthy. Naked juice is a little on the costly side of things, but it's worth it when you take into account their superiority to their competitors Bolthouse and Odwalla.

While you can taste each individual item that has been juiced to make this beverage, it does have a wide variety of flavors. A combination of the strawberries and cherries is the first thing that you taste when you take a sip. From there it slips into a strange sweetened veggie medley. They all kind of just mix together into their own unique flavor. It's strange, but it's enjoyable. It has a pretty general juice aftertaste with nothing specific being the prominent flavor.

This isn't the kind of juice that you sip whilst hanging out with friends, but it is the kind of beverage that you would enjoy and benefit from drinking at breakfast. With all of the vitamins it contains it would be a nice way to kick start your day.