Energy Drink - 555 Reviews

There is a common misconception in this world that the life of a hula girl is an easy one. The truth is nothing could be further from the truth. They are required to wake up an hour before dawn in order to get a proper workout before the brutal sun rises. Said work out included power lifting crates of pineapples and running four miles barefoot over a trail of discarded pineapple "shells" as wild boars chase them. They do this in order to keep up their stamina. After a three-minute rest period, each hula girl must then eat 1/4 of her weight of a mixture of pork and poi in order to keep up her "plump" body type. There is a fine line that they must walk between being healthy and in shape and not becoming skinny. After gorging themselves the girls go out to their first jobs of the day on tourist boats. After the first eight hours they are allowed 30 minutes of personal time before they must report to the luau for the nights festivities. After several more hours of grueling dancing they are allowed to pass out for a few short hours before they must rise and begin it all again.

In the olden days the girls would often collapse from exhaustion. Then energy drinks came onto the scene. Many of the girls refused to drink them because they tasted foreign and did not fit in with the tastes of their culture. Now that Cintron has released this Pineapple Passion energy drink 99.4% of all hula girls are on board. When you first pull it out of the fridge and drink it while it's nice and cold it doesn't taste like an energy drink at all. It actually tastes like a nice pineapple pop. As it warms up the chemical flavor raises it's head more and more. If you drink this over a half hour, by the end it will be kind of gross, and the pineapple flavoring will become nothing more than an afterthought. I suggest you drink it ice cold and bask in its glory that way. Celebrate the salvation of the hula girl!

Much like the other flavor of Tweaker I had, this is pretty damn good. I don't like it as much as the grape, but in the world of energy shots it's definitely in the top tier as far as taste goes. This has a mixed berry taste to it, but has a little bit more chemical aftertaste than the grape did. It definitely works in the energy department as well. I was feeling a little sleepy here at Spiral Scratch but now I'm chair dancing to Crystal Castles.

Herbert is a simple man. He goes to work every day and is always five minutes early. He's never been in trouble with the police and has never as much as received a speeding ticket. He pays his taxes on time and never complains about the weather. Herbert is the ideal citizen. Herbert went into work one day and in the cubicle next to him was a new hire. A young man called Bartholomew or, as the nameplate on his desk said, Bart.

Bart came into work fifteen minutes late almost every day, wore sneakers with a wrinkled suit, and wore headphones blasting metal at unsafe volumes. Herbert didn't mind because the partition between them did a good job of blocking the sound. Bart wasn't a bad kid, just young. One day, Bart brought in a case of something and Herbert curiously asked him what it was. Bart told him it was Cintron Cranberry Splash and offered one to him. Who was Herbert to refuse a gift? "Such a nice gesture. Sure I'll have one,” said Herbert. Herbert drank it and thought it was very good. Slightly carbonated with a nice cranberry taste. Herbert thought that it tastes like a sweeter carbonated version of Ocean Spray's basic cranberry juice. All of a sudden, something happened. Herbert switched his radio involuntarily from Daryl Hall's I'm In A Philly Mood to a local, independent hard rock station. His hand grabbed a black marker and drew a barbed wire tattoo on his bicep. "What's going on!?" exclaimed Herbert. Bart looked over the partition and said, "Hey, dude. Did you like that energy drink I gave you? They're pretty rad. I drank two today." Herbert was shocked. He didn't even know it was an energy drink. "It didn't taste like an energy drink. I didn't know. I don't drink stuff like that." Bart noticed his new barbed wire tattoo and said, "Woah, dude! We've got the same tattoo." Bart lifted up his shirt to show the exact tattoo on his arm.

Hebert used his first sick day of his life that day to go home, sleep off his caffeine high, and scrub his magic marker tattoo off his arm. "Never again", he promised.

John Goodman is a man amongst men. I have never seen him in a role that I didn't absolutely love. Keep in mind that I don't think I've seen anything he's done since the early 2000's. He may be the most famous for his roles as Dan Conner and Walter Sobchak (which are both incredible), but for my money there is never a better moment of him on the silver screen than when he states "You just got your asses whipped by a bunch of goddamn nerds.....NERDS!" I think that might be the most commonly said phrase by Editor Dan. Incredible. It's because of that speech that I told the other Thirsty Dudes that I was going to review this drink.

The NERD company stresses that their product is not just an energy drink, it is also a focus drink. On top of your normal energy drink chemical ingredients it also has Vinpocetine, Huperzine-A, Chinese Ginkgo Biloba and DMAE in it, which are cognitive enhancers. I drank this can before I went to band practice today, and I wasn't even thinking about the focus part until I just sat down to write this. I think it actually really works. In hindsight I feel like I was way more focused on what I was playing. So it's got that going for it.

Now on to the fun stuff. As a scientist I can assure you that it is a scientific fact that most energy drinks taste like various melted down types of candy. It's something that I both hate and love about them. Now I know what you're thinking, and yes your dreams have come true. This does in fact remind me of liquefied Nerds candy. It may be a psychosomatic thing, but I had my ladyfriend try it and she also confirmed it. This is one tasty, tasty energy/focus drink. It's one of the best energy based drinks I've ever tasted. Also the company wants to be known as a study aid and avoids being associated with anything extreme or bar/club events. To quote them "Basically, if you want to study drink NERD, if you want party drink a Red Bull. " That is something I can get behind. Hopefully this will get the popularity it deserves. Like the company told us

Now in the eyes of your father, your maker and your coach: go get some NERD!

Grape Kool-Aid. That's EXACTLY what this tastes like. Sure there's an aftertaste of nasty energy stuff that lingers in your mouth for a few minutes. But as many know, in the world of energy drinks (especially energy shots), it's hard to find one that doesn't taste like chemicals. Sure grape Kool-Aid isn't the greatest flavor of all time, but it's much better and tolerable than liquid death. I picked up a few different flavors of these energy shots at Dollar Tree last weekend. I feared them because Dollar Tree is usually the place where drinks go to die. This has renewed my faith in them and I look forward to trying the other flavors now.

Yesterday was my favorite day of the year; the first Friday of the Erie County Fair. I'm an old man and an outdoors kid at heart (yes it can both happen simultaneously) so I love the fair. To make things better the first Friday is the day of the annual llama fashion (costume) show. Llamas are pretty much the greatest things to ever exist and to watch kids parade them around in goofy costumes they made is just perfect. As per usual I took off from work and spent the entire day at the fair (11 hours). I came prepared with this energy shot to take to keep me up and moving (I didn't sit down for more than 3 minutes all day).

First off it smelled pretty terrible. It smelled like acai gone wrong. I had a couple friends take a nice big whiff and the disgust was present on the groups collected faces. I gave it a little taste, and it tasted only slightly better than it smelled. I was excited to have an organic energy drink. While it didn't taste gross in the chemical way it was far from good. I'm not a huger acai fan, but this was the worst I've ever had. I was disappointed because I've enjoyed everything else I have tried by this company, but this did not live up to my expectations. I would have probably given it a one bottle rating, but since it's an energy shot, and they never taste good by definition I will give it a two for being the first one I've had that didn't taste chemical.

Many years ago, Franklin Mercer took a vacation by himself to Las Vegas. His wife Sharon wanted to come along, but he needed a break from her so he told her it was a business trip. So she stayed behind in their home of Zelienople, PA while he went to have fun in Sin City.

The problem is, Franklin Mercer doesn't really know how to interact with other humans well. And he doesn't really know how the world works sometimes. For instance, when he checked into his hotel room, he decided to go down and do some gambling because that's what he heard people do in Vegas. He always liked the way the ball rolled around the roulette wheel on television so that was his first stop. I think he must have seen some spy movie where the villain replaces the ball with one of his own. He couldn't find one of those white marbles so he brought a green bouncy ball. He walked right up to the wheel and in mid spin he put his ball in it.

Obviously, the ball went flying. The game had to be cancelled and since the money was on the table all the players lost their bets (some weird rule this casino had). This in turn made all the players really mad at Franklin so they chased him out. Even though Franklin has been getting chased his whole life, he's not a good runner. He could have really used this Vegas Fuel. He probably would have liked the fruit punch taste it has. He likes sweet things so this would have really made him happy.

Also it would have gave him the energy to avoid being beaten up in the back alley of a casino in Vegas. Oh Franklin Mercer... when will you learn?

I have never eaten guarana, but I think I would love it. Every drink I've ever had with guarana has been incredible. Take this wonderful bottle of Bawls Guarana Exxtra. It has the standard (but still awesome) bottle with little bumps all over it. I've had the original, and the G33K B33R, but this is my first time drinking the Exxtra. I didn't realize until I was half way through the bottle that it was a diet drink. It's really sweet and has a great guarana taste, but there is no diet taste at all. It tastes lighter than the original flavor of Bawls, but just as good.

Hats off to you Bawls for making the best tasting diet energy drink I've ever had. Good work!

Urban Dictionary defines 'tweaker' as:
1. Person who constantly stays up cleaning, washing, organizing, power tooling, sorting or otherwise keeping them-self busy doing menial tasks.
2. Someone who constantly makes slight alterations on (usually a very specific) object, i.e. computer, software, automobile, etc.
3. A compulsive liar, thief, or both.
4. A methamphetamine ("tweak"), or other form of speed, addict (who displays all of the above in an obsessive-compulsive manner).

I could understand wanting to associate your energy drink with the first definition. Keeping busy/being active/etc... is usually an after effect of drinking one. Maybe even #2, though that sort of sounds like borderline OCD.

Three and four though... that's where the lose me. Why someone would want to associate their delicious drink with being a liar, thief, or meth-head is beyond my comprehension. And yes, this is a delicious energy shot. I was surprised due to the name, but it has a really good grape taste and only a slight energy drink aftertaste. Other than the usual energy drink taste, this has a good grape juice flavor. I've only been drinking it for a minute or two but I already feel more energized and ready to get stuff done on this Sunday afternoon.

The other day Punchy was hanging out with that weird "angel" dude that stars in the Red Bull commercials. Punchy just wanted to slug the ol' punching bag for a bit, but the angel guy just kept trying to get him to drink some Red Bull. He kept going on and on about it giving you wings. Being that Punchy is still a child somehow he gives in easily to peer pressure. It didn't take long before he downed a can, then two, then three. He was flying. He had grown accustomed to sugar highs, but this was something completely new to him. He got so worked up that he kept goading the angel to punch him in the stomach. One punch later and Punchy was laying on the ground in a puddle of his own red vomit. Just then a vampire was passing by and thought that it was blood that Punchy was passed out in. Never one to pass up a free meal he pulled out a straw and started to drink it down. It was obviously not blood, but it had a decent taste. The vampire called his friend, who runs True Colors, and they worked out a deal. Long story short they kidnapped Punchy, they keep him tied up in a basement and cyclically force-feed him Red Bull and punch him in a stomach to make him vomit. They then can what comes up, which tastes like a mixture of Hawaiian Punch and Red Bull. I swear it doesn't actually taste like vomit.

For my snack at work today I brought a half eaten bag of pretzels. It turns out that they were pretty old and stale as can be. Gross sauce. Seeing as I hadn't really eaten all day come 3pm I was starving. There was no food to be found so I downed this to curb my hunger. We've all seen the diet pills episode of Saved by the Bell and know that they are really nothing but caffeine. So I figured caffeine = appetite suppressor. It actually worked, but since my stomach was empty the energy rush made me all crazy. I don't recommend it at all.

When I took the first sip I was shocked by how much I liked the way it tasted. It didn't taste overly diet, but it still had the chemical energy drink flavor that we talk about way to often. With each sip it got worse and worse. About 2/3 through the can it was well along its way to being undrinkable. It's a shame because the normal variety is pretty tasty.

Step 1: Take a delicious glass of lemonade
Step 2: Pour some seltzer water into it
Step 3: Squeeze a lime into the glass
Step 4: Add an energy mixture
Step 5: Grab a box of Stevia and shake it like a Polaroid picture into the glass

End result: A drink that is a delicious tart lemonade at first, but then has an awful fake sugar and energy drink aftertaste. I'm sure people who like Stevia will think this is great, but I personally can't get into it.

I've never had goji berry juice before. I've had things that have been flavored with goji, but nothing this strong. It was a really surprising upon first sip. It has a really rich flavor to it. Usually energy shots are kinda gross and it takes a lot to choke them down. While I'm not the biggest fan of goji berries, this is by far the best tasting energy shot I have ever had. On top of that, it's full of so much good stuff that I don't feel like I'm poisoning my body by drinking it. I think a less concentrated energy drink of this, with carbonated water added would taste amazing.

I don't know what the difference between Blu and Blu Day is in the energy sense, but I can 100% say that Blu Day may be the best energy drink I have ever tasted.

When the company sent us some samples to review they mentioned that a couple of them were not available in the U.S. I will assume that this is one of them since I cannot translate the label.

Seriously though, it's incredible. It's like Red Bull and an entire field of mixed berries had a baby together and that baby got liquefied and put into this tiny can. It almost tastes diet, but it keeps its flavor so I don't think it actually is. It certainly is the most refreshing energy drink I've ever had.

Great, they did it again! Here I am, just a run-of-the-mill tactical armored robotic pontoon (everyone calls me TARP), sitting in the water. 2:00pm rolls around, which is my refueling time. It's easily the highlight of my day since I have never seen battle. Everyone knows i get 3 quarts of premium grade fuel. It's in my manual, on the sign on the dock, and I've even made sure everyone in the troop gets a twitter update about it at 1:30pm everyday. The guys who have been on base for a few years, they know better. They are aware of what I'm capable of. It's these new recruits, these "hot shots" fresh out of the academy that love to pull pranks on me.

The latest prank they like to pull is giving me this energy drink, Troop Fuel, instead of my request premium grade stuff. Don't get me wrong; this stuff isn't bad at all. It tastes a lot like Red Bull, but not as bitter tasting. Why do I know what Red Bull tastes like? Another prank. See, these guys know energy drinks get me going crazy. I'm used to sitting still in this water all day, so an energy drink gets me all wired. This Troop Fuel is definitely doing the trick. If I weren't chained to this dock, I'd be zipping around this lagoon.

Hello everybody, we're reporting live from somewhere. I'm not sure where we are because I can't see a damn thing. I just got this promotion to news reporter last week and this is my first time in the field. They didn't tell me where they were taking me, just said it would be "unforgettable". Well I definitely won't forget standing outside in the middle of a hurricane. What's that? Oh this is considered a cyclone, but isn't yet a hurricane? Either way, it sucks! I wore my nice suit today because I wanted to look nice on camera and now this rain has ruined it.

Looking back to an hour ago, I should have known this was going to happen. Jim wouldn't let me see what the weather was like on the coast because he was being a jerk. Plus, he gave me this Cyclone energy shot and told me they were out of coffee. What kind of TV station runs out of coffee? That's absurd! That's what interns are for, to go to the store and get more coffee. But I digress...

This energy shot actually wasn't that bad. I had one once before when I was in college during finals week. It really worked! This one seems to be working too. The taste is pretty good too. It's like a tart cherry syrup flavor. Oh great, a tree branch just knocked the rest of the energy shot out of my hand. Luckily we weren't rolling. What? We've been live this whole time? I thought you were just checking your levels!? Great, now I'm going to get letters from people saying that I littered and my mom is going to think I'm on drugs. She thinks anything besides water is bad for you to drink. Okay, we're done here!

In high school a bunch of friends and I all wrote fake doctors notes for each other and ditched out midday to go to the University of Buffalo for their Spring Fest. Snapcase was playing, and seeing as we were all young "hardcore" kids and the "Steps" EP had just come out we just had to go. So we all left in 10-minute intervals as to not seem suspicious. I was the last to go and the lady in the office asked me where we were all going because obviously five friends did not have dentist appointments on the same day. I got all flustered and she just winked at me and told me to enjoy my cleaning.

We got to the college with an hour to spare so we hit up the college store. We were young and dumb with disposable income looking for some sort of adventure. A couple of us decided to buy boxes of No-Doz and get all messed up on caffeine (this was during a time where Jolt was pretty much the only widely available energy drink). We got super hyper and jittery, which made us have a ton of fun at the show. We took them around 1PM. That night around midnight I laid down for bed. My heart was still racing and beating super hard. After about 15 minutes I was convinced I was dying. I woke up my mom's boyfriend (as to not freak out my mom) and he called a friend who was a nurse to see what we should do. She told him I would be fine I just had to wait it out. It was one of the scariest moments of my life. I thought I was going to die and I thought I was going to get in a buttload of trouble because I downed a box of caffeine pills.

As soon as I saw this jug of liquid caffeine that night played over and over in my head. As awesome as it is to be able to be able to have a adjust your caffeine intake to your liking and get a pick me up without all of the other garbage that is in most energy drinks, I can't help but think of stupid kids messing around to see who could ingest the most caffeine. We did it when I was in grade school except it was how many Warheads candies can you have in your mouth at once, or how many sprays of Binaca breath spray can you shoot under your tongue. As soon as this makes it's way into the gas station/corner store market there are going to be a bunch of kids who develop heart problems. I get freaked out when I see young kids downing Monster drinks, but what can I say? I'd be doing the same thing if I were their age. Also you add this to drinks in a syringe. I don't care what age you are that is just cool and enticing.

Now onto the whole point of this: the flavor. I put a couple of drops of this on my tongue and it is definitely "semi sweet." It has the chemical taste of energy drinks when you drink it straight up, but you're supposed to mix it in a drink. To keep things pure I put some in a glass of water. When you drink it that way the chemical taste is completely nonexistent. It definitely adds sweetness to the water, but it's nothing crazy. It tastes like I dumped a packet of sugar into my glass. If you added this to a juice I don't think you'd be able to taste the difference. Now that is pretty amazing.

Another plus is that it's pretty small and easily brought along in a jacket pocket. This is either the best of worst thing ever. I'm still not sure.

Oh yeah, back to the No-Doz night. My mom's boyfriend never said a word to my mom about it. It was our little secret. He was a good dude. I miss having him around.

One of the things I miss in life is Clone High. If you're unfamiliar it was a cartoon on MTV about how the clones of historical figures spent their time in high school. It is a documentary and it was shot in real time.

One of the episodes revolved around an "energy drink" called X-Stream Blue. It was completely hysterical. To quote one of the X-Stream Blue sales reps "It's really just pancake batter mixed with blue paint in a sports bottle…€”Sick! Tight! Cyber! Awesome!"

Luckily this version of Blu does not contain any paint of the color blue or any other hue. At least I think it doesn't. I can't read the ingredients, so I suppose it is completely possible that I am ingesting paint and pancake batter. I don't know how strict other countries versions of the FDA are. I will assume it's okay, as it tastes like melted down candy and passion fruit. You know that normal energy drink flavor, but with decent juice mixed in. It's actually one of the best tasting energy drinks I've ever tried.

Blu: Stick it in your face-hole and slam it!

When I saw the name of this company, I was really hoping the logo would be an awesome drawing of a huge angry hornet sinking its stinger into someone and killing them. I feel like that would compliment the name Killer Buzz a lot better than their current can design. Don't get me wrong; it's nice and classy design. To me, it looks more like a sophisticated sparkling juice than an energy drink.

Like most energy drinks, this is a total mock Red Bull taste. It's good because I like the taste of Red Bull. It's definitely working because I am currently listening to the mellow sounds of Eluvium and now I want to listen to something more upbeat. Score one for Killer Buzz!

Before I continue I'd just like to state that I have not gone completely beverage crazy this morning and been downing drinks left and right. I'm playing a little bit of catch up, as we like to refer to it down at Initech.

Now that I've cleared that up I'd like to announce that I am completely in love with Triple Berry Smoothies from Orange Julius. I know there are much better smoothies out in the world, but something about the frothiness of their Triple Berry really hits me in the right spot. I've also been conditioned to think of that exact flavor whenever I hear the words triple and berry said back to back.

Now you know where my head was when I opened this drink. Unfortunately Hydrive couldn't live up to that glory, but this is in no way a bad drink. It's a non-carbonated "enhanced water energy drink." Like most energy drinks it tastes like some sort of melted down candy. Not a brand name candy, but some sort that you would buy in the bulk section. What is that company? Brachs? I guess that is a brand name. Oh well. It tastes like a melted down hard candy. I'm okay with that. You should be too.