Juice - 935 Reviews

Sometimes my friends, the bargain just isn't worth it. You're in the store looking for something to quench your thirst and you come across a tallboy whose label announced it as “Only $1.” The natural reaction is, “Wow, that's quite a deal. I'd be paying less than five cents per fluid ounce.” The problem with that is, that even if what is contained in the can is the tastiest beverage on Earth, do you really need 23oz of it in one sitting? I understand that the Nutrition Facts state that the can actually holds three servings, but who doesn't drink it all in one go, or throw out the remainder? If this was a resealable bottle, it would be a different story, but these drinks are marketed for people to grab whilst on the go and no one wants to carry around an open can until they are ready for their next serving.

The sad truth is that this is not only too much beverage, but also it is far from being the tastiest beverage on the planet. It's a fruit punch that only contains 5% juice. That means that 95% of what you'd be drinking is composed of weird stuff like ester of wood rosin, brominated vegetable oil and of course corn syrup. I know a lot of that is actually water, but still, come on. Fruit punch is not very good to begin with. I was once told that it was the beverage of children and poor people. While I do think there was a bit of racism meant in that statement, I have to admit that I have never seen anyone who was over the age of 15 and well off drinking anything of this variety (unless it was mixed juices at a fancy juice bar, which I wouldn't consider fruit punch).

This does have couple of things going for it, and they all boil down to the sweeteners used. Veryfine decided to mix sucralose in with their corn syrup to lower the calorie count in the beverage. It leaves it with a slight diet flavor, but nothing unbearable. The big up to that is that it's a fruit punch that doesn't feel like you're drinking syrup.

Overall it still has that generic fruit punch flavor that is like the hotdogs of juices (ie. whatever is leftover). I appreciate the company taking steps to improve fruit punch, but there is still a long ways to go. Also, unless you're planning on sharing this with a friend, I really hope you plan on pouring a bunch of it out, or have a fridge close by to save it for later.

This is it. I have reached the end of my three-day juice cleanse. Well I guess not really the end, as I won't be eating again until the morning, but I've made it to my final bottle of juice. In the past three days I have consumed 18 bottles of juice. Some were incredible, others I had to choke down for the nutrients. I always wondered how I would fare in a post apocalyptic world, as I can be a picky eater, but I was able to drink every last drop of this cleanse, so I now have more faith in my ability to survive.

This here is the juice that I ended every day of the cleanse with. It is a liquid version of carrot, beet, celery, cucumber, parsley, spinach, lemon and orange. Some of those ingredients sound great, and some of them are a little ehh. Have I mentioned that through out the past three days my taste buds have turned against me? Juices that I had no problem with, and thoroughly enjoyed at the beginning of this run, are just gross to me now. My body doesn't want to deal with them anymore. Most of that are the greens that they are rebelling against.

The first night I had this I didn't think it was bad at all. The second night I wasn't so sure. Tonight I think I'm back on board. Each sip is a bit different. When the orange, beet and carrot flavors run this drink it's great. It has a bit of that dirty, earthy taste that I like in juices. It also has a ice citrus sweetness to it. If it was always like that I would love this undyingly. Unfortunately in other sip the celery and parsley a major players and it's those sips I could do without. After this cleanse it's going to be a long time before I have celery again. It was in a decent amount of these juices and it just stands out so much to me.

So I've lasted the full three days on this cleanse. There were moments where I definitely thought I was going to give in and eat something, but I held strong. I had on and off again headaches from the first night on, but I shockingly never felt weak. I really expected to spend most of this time in bed or on the couch watching movies and not wanting to experience any other part of life, but I stayed fairly active and went on with my normal life as if nothing was wrong. I did have some nights of sleep that were far from stellar, and a constant nagging in my stomach, but I made it through with much less damage than expected. I don't feel any major difference in my heath, but I do feel a bit lighter and I can tell that I have lost some weight. I'm going to estimate 4-5 pounds, but I won't know until the morning. I just feel leaner, but I guess self-starvation will do that to a person. It's been an interesting ride, and if you have interest in it, I say take it for a spin and see what it's all about. I doubt I'll do it again, but I did clean some garbage out of my body with relatively minimal discomfort. That certainly counts for something.

Thanks to Love Grace for supplying us with the juice for this cleanse. I am poor and cheap and never would have spring for it myself, but it was something I'm glad I was able to experience, and I hope my ranting encourages others to give their cleanse a try.

The morning after update:
After my final weigh in this morning I have officially lost 6 pounds on the Love Grace juice cleanse. I know that weight loss isn't the main reason to do a cleanse, and I know I'll gain most of it back, but that's a lot of weight to lose in three days. After eating a bowl of cereal this morning I also feel great. Without the nagging hunger and headaches, I can see that the cleanse did actually do something and I feel way better than I did when I started this three days ago.

Dear Love Grace,
I am sorry, but this is completely vile. It's not just my hunger or my hatred of bananas either. I actually don't even think this tastes much like banana. I made my girlfriend try it as well, as she loves fancy juices and bananas. She said it was one of the worst things she's ever tasted and it reminded her of vomit.

One might think that a mixture of banana, goji berry, cacao, maca, vanilla bean, dates, coconut oil, flax seed and Himalayan sea salt might be tasty. One would most definitely be wrong. Cacao in its pure form and fruit is always a bad idea. The bitter and the sweet just never mix right. I've had goji berries and dark chocolate together before and I thought that was gross with 70% chocolate. This is nearly unbearable.

It's also so damn thick that it wouldn't pour out of the bottle. I had to shake it into my mouth. Once I made room in the bottle I added a bit of water to thin it out so I could chug it. I needed that flavor in my mouth for a short of time as possible, while still getting the nourishment. I instantly drank a glass of water to wash it all away. Unfortunately for the next 15 minutes I kept burping it back up. Ugh. This was enough to make me never want to do a cleanse that involved it again.

Halfway through the last day of my juice cleanse, this is exactly what I needed. It's a nice simple drink, well sort of. This is lemon, shilajit, cayenne, agave and Himalayan sea salt. Basically this is an ever so slightly salty, spicy lemonade. This is a better version of the lemon detox drink (lemon juice, maple syrup and cayenne pepper), with shilajit (a concentrated tar form a plant) replacing the maple syrup. My roommate did that detox once years ago and I don't think its benefits outweighed how bad he felt/looked. Being one drink out of 18 though, it's nice. The cayenne gives it a nice burn, similar to the ginger in the other drinks, without being too overpowering.

It's probably the sweetest of all the juices I've had so far, and that's a nice change of pace. I never thought I'd get sick of juice, but I'm just about there. Well, if it was 100% fruit juice I'd probably jump all over it.

There is a lot of green going on in a juice cleanse. From the money you pay for it to all the veggies you drink. I thought I was okay with that. From time to time drinking a juice with things such as chard, kale, spinach, celery, cucumber, apple and lemon in them (like this juice) isn't bad at all. You drinking something healthy and you tend to feel good about it, that is when you have a belly full of other food, or know that you will be eating in the near future. I've had juices similar to this a handful of times in my life and I don't remember ever wishing I were eating a “real” meal instead. You know what I would happily be eating a salad composed of everything in this bottle over drinking it, because it tastes exactly like I'm drinking a salad, whose only dressing is a little sprits of lemon. It is a very accurate juice. I can make out each and every one of the ingredients in the flavor. It's just not something that I want to drink when I haven't eaten in two days. I wonder if some added ginger would fix this right up. Ginger is healthy, it's in the other juices, and I love it. The burn would help this salad go down all the easier.

Seriously, I can't even walk by the kitchen without my stomach rumbling. I only have one day left, but it's going to be a long day. All for health, right?

Edit:
I added some ground up ginger root to this, and it did what I expected. I am enjoying this much more.

I'm now a day and a half into this juice cleanse and I shockingly feel fine energy-wise. By this point I really expected to just be curled up on the couch, miserable and not wanting to do anything. Instead I went for a couple hour walk to enjoy the brief stint of nice weather we're having. I have been experiencing some on and off again headaches, but apparently that is normal. It is getting to the time of day when I eat dinner, and I can feel that in my stomach. Luckily it's time for my protein smoothie of the day. Unlucky for me that smoothie contains banana, flax seed, kale, dates, spirulina, hempseed, chia seed, coconut oil, lemon, Himalayan sea salt and wheatgrass powder.

Now I eat a lot of kale in my day-to-day life and I love wheatgrass, but everything else in here are ingredients that I don't really have a taste for. I expected this to be all banana, but it's pretty bland and the majority of the flavor seems to come from the various seeds involved and the lemon. The banana is there more in scent than taste. It's also super, super thick, almost to the level that I feel like I should eat it with a spoon. It's thicker than applesauce, which I tend to drink for the record.

I got no pleasure from the taste of this smoothie, but I finished the whole bottle for the sake of my health and this cleanse. I would never in a million years drink this outside of a cleanse, but it's not really something that you would come across in day-to-day life. Besides that healthy doesn't always means it tastes good and sometimes you just have to bite the bullet. Also note that our rating on Thirsty Dudes is based on flavor and not functionality. It's gets two for flavor, but it would get a five for health.

To this drinks benefit it definitely curbed my hunger a bit and for that I am grateful.

We've entered day two of my juice cleanse via Love Grace. I was doing great all day yesterday until about 10PM when I got a decent sized headache, and I started to feel pretty weak. I assume it's due to toxins working out of my body, and you know hunger. I woke up this morning and felt a lot better. I'm hungry but it's manageable.

I started off my morning with a bottle of Purify, and now it's time for my second juice of the day: Ginger Bomb. This is just great. It's orange, ginger, lemon, oregano extract and Himalayan sea salt, which when mixed together make for an intense little juice. It's a citrus-ginger explosion in your mouth, which then continues to erupt down your throat and into your stomach. It's pretty strong lemon-wise and the orange makes it a little less intense, but it's still pretty sour and slightly salty. The ginger is there more as a burn than as a flavor. I wish the taste was more prevalent, but the burn is so great that I can't really complain.

It seems like this is the most functional juice of the entire cleanse. It's anti-inflammatory, helps with digestive health, it's anti-bacterial, anti-viral, it improves circulation, supports metabolism, boosts the immune system, is adaptogenic and balancing. On top of all that I think it tastes great. It has made me feel more normal than any of the other juices I've had so far. 4oz of magical explosions.

Bananas very well may be the bane of my existence. I don't understand how anyone gets even a smidge of enjoyment out of them. The flavor is gross, and the texture might be worse. When I opened my box of juices and saw this I knew I was in for an unpleasant experience. With banana, flaxseed, almond, lemon, dates, vegan probiotic, Himalayan sea salt and coconut oil all mixed up there was zero chance that I was going to enjoy this. As a result I decided I should get it out of the way on the first day, so that when I've reached my full “hangry” potential, at least the drink that is helping to fill me up won't be disgusting to me.

Was it gross? You betcha. I thought bananas were gross on their own, but mixed with lemon it's even worse. That being said, my ladyfriend who is a fan of the yellow devil forced me to give her a sip and absolutely loved it. I will not hold my banana prejudice against this smoothie. I'm going to assume that most people would think this was probably the best out of the bunch, so keep that in mind and ignore my complaints because they are all founded in my hatred of a fruit that goes from green to yellow to brown to black.

Besides the banana and the lemon mixing weirdly, this is somewhat salty, which I find weird in a juice, but I think with the proper fruits I could really enjoy. The rest of the ingredients kind of mix together to try and balance out the banana flavor a bit.

This is indeed a smoothie as it is pretty thick, which was unfortunate because it made it hard to chug the bottle just to get it over with. One good thing I will say about this juice is that I was getting to a point where I was beginning to get annoyed due to hunger. You know when you're hanging out with friends and you're all starving, but you can't agree where to eat, so hours pass and you just want to punch them in their collective throats for being indecisive, but then realize that you're also being indecisive so you then want to punch yourself. I was getting to the beginning stages of that point, and this get me through it without snapping at anyone.

Continuing on in my juice cleanse I have come to the most initially appealing of the juices for my tastes. This Super Cider is simply apple, carrot, ginger and lemon. I'm a sucker for cider and ginger, so throw the two together and it's inevitably going to be a party in my mouth.

I did not expect the ginger to be so strong in this juice, and it was the best surprise I've gotten all day. I would say that this tastes more like ginger than anything else. It certainly has mainly an apple base, but it's the taste and burn of the ginger that make this drink so great. It has the kind of burn that you feel in your stomach. That's a good burn. The taste of the carrots is only apparent if you concentrate on finding it. The lemon just rounds things out. It's more visible in some sips than others, but it's never really at the forefront of the flavor. The ginger really doesn't quit with this. I could see it being a bit much for some people, but for those of us who love a little heat in our drinks this is just perfect.

Like all of the Love Grace juices this is raw, you know how juice should be. It's too bad that raw juice doesn't have a very long shelf life because it always taste so much better, and is better for you.

Juice cleanses are all the rage these days. I personally think that it's great. I am a lover of juice, and the fact that people are making an effort to be healthier is a move in the right direction. The fact that some companies are expanding their cleanses into other grocery stores besides Whole Foods so that it reaches a wider audience of “Everyday Joes” is an even better step. There are so many chemicals are garbage added to food these days that most people aren't even aware of that it's a good things to take some steps to cleanse your body of them from time to time. Juice cleanses are also used to gain mental clarity, improve overall well being, and the biggest allure for people is that it helps in losing weight. From an outsiders perspective it is a healthy way to starve yourself and get your body to work unnatural things out of your system.

I've wanted to do a cleanse myself for sometime, but the downfall of it is that there is a hefty price tag on this healthy live (Love Grace's is $168 for a three day run). Keep in mind you do get 18 bottles of juice for that price, and you have no need to purchase any other food in that time as well, so in the end it's not all that terribly expensive, but it does look like a large sum to drop at one time. Thanks to my involvement with Thirsty Dudes Love Grace sent us a three-day cleanse for review. I am starting it today, and I expect to be fully miserable for a while. I most definitely become easily annoyed when I am hungry, so I would probably steer clear of me until Thursday. No one likes to be “hangry.”

The first juice in the cleanse is this bottle of “Purify.” It is a collaboration of coconut water, celery, chard, spinach and cucumber. This is a first step in what is going to seem like a very long road. I am generally a bit weary about juices that have celery in them. On it's own it's a wonderful vegetable that I really enjoy. The problem is that when it is juiced and mixed with other juices it tends to take over the flavor of any drink. Love Grace worked out a nice solution to that problem; the use of coconut water. It dulls the flavor of the celery a nice amount. It's still very prevalent, but it's not a full on assault to your taste buds. When you hold this drink in your mouth it tastes just like coconut water with some greens juiced into it. It tastes mostly like spinach and cucumber, actually I couldn't taste the celery at all until I swallowed and then it's just in the aftertaste. There is a natural sweetness to this, so it doesn't taste like you're just drinking a salad. I mean you are, but it's no where near as gross as that sounds.

Well done, Love Grace. You've made the first step of this cleanse very enjoyable. It gives me hope that I'm not going to want to murder everyone around me before I reach completion. Sure I'll still be hungry, but at least I'll have some good flavors to help me along.

Motts, I have some questions for you. This product boasts that it has 40% less sugar than your average fruit juice, which I think is a good thing. Now, I'm assuming you didn't perform some sort of magic and remove the natural sugar from the apples and grapes that are the base of this drink. Maybe I'm wrong; maybe you have employed some sorcerers for your bottling plants. I'm going to guess that you just didn't add any HFCS or sugar to the juice. Instead you added stevia, which is healthier but still seems unnecessary. You did a good job with having this particular all natural zero calorie sweetener not taste overly diet in this juice, but you can still tell that it's there. My main question is this: why add any addition sweeteners at all? Why not just let the apples and grapes speak for themselves? Have we really come to a point in society where the natural sweetness of fruit is simply not enough? Do the majority of your customers really prefer that a perfectly sweet beverage be even sweeter? I just don't get it. You can taste the actual fruit behind the stevia, and I can tell you it's doing fine on it's own. Grape is running the game, but it invited apple along for the ride. I understand that grape juice in the raw if you will, can be a bit harsh for some people, but isn't it apple's job to keep it toned down?

In my opinion this would have been perfectly fine, if not better without the addition of a sweetener of any kind. I still enjoy it, but it leaves me wanting something more pure. If you are a person who likes their sweets sweeter, I suggest this. Why take on those extra calories when they are completely unnecessary?

Let me be the first to congratulate kiwi for getting out of the abusive relationship that it was in with strawberry. For decades the only time you ever heard about this beautiful fruit was in relation to its counterpart. In those cases it always took a back seat to the red fruit. I know their relationship was forged because of their similar tiny black seeds, but it quickly went downhill. We've all heard what went on behind closed doors, but I'm not one to perpetuate the rumor mill. All I will say is that kiwi deserved better and I'm glad to see it stepping out on it's own into the spotlight.

Now after decades of living in the shadows, it was no surprise that kiwi wasn't going to come out of the gates and blow our minds. Sure, there are some issues with this beverage, but the important thing is that kiwi is trying and finally there is a beverage that is at least more accurately portraying it's natural flavor. Kiwi is not completely comfortable to come out all on it's own, so in here it is hiding behind sugar, and there's a whole lot of it. There is 69g of sugar in this 16.9oz can with a mixture of sugar, acesulfame K and aspartame. Sure, it tastes more like biting into a kiwi than any other drink I've ever had, but it tastes like you're biting into a canned kiwi that was in heavy syrup.

As a way of an apology for all the sugar kiwi actually put bits and chunks of itself into the drink as well. It gives it a nice texture that might be gross to some, but that someone like myself really enjoyed. Think of orange juice with a lot of pulp but switch the fruit and dump in way too much sugar. There you go.

This is a good juice. This is a very good fruit punch. Fruit punch is a bit of a jerk, if I'm being honest. For the most part, fruit punch is an overly sweetened mess that makes a mockery of the fruits it claims to be made from.

This though, this isn't too bad. There is a very strong taste of cherries, which I enjoy, and a handful of other fruit that kind of blend together nicely. Apples and grapes kind of mush up into a flavor themselves as if someone just angrily let it all out on them when they weren't looking. A horrible mugging that they didn't see coming. Just mushed. Their loss is your gain because this is pretty good. Even the Stevia does a fine job of keeping things sweet but also in their place. It's like a nice but stern history teacher. Ahh history teachers; the oldest teachers in the game.

Guys/Girls, I have to admit that I am not a big rooibos tea drinker. In fact, I don't know if I've ever had a proper glass of it. I do know that when there is a selection of bottled teas it is one of the last I would choose. I have no good reason for this. I don't dislike the taste by any means; it's just kind of there. I guess I'm just a green tea lover at heart, and it will always be my first choice, especially if it is jasmine related.

Cheribundi has done a good job with a tea that I care very little about. They took the slightly nutty flavored tea and kept its integrity while adding their classic cherry juice to it. The result is like the mullet of beverages, cherry up front, rooibos in the back. You are instantly greeted by a nice, tart cherry flavor that fades into a tea flavor for the aftertaste. If this type of tea is your thing, then jump right on this train. If you're on the fence, maybe you just need to buy a day pass and ride the train for a little bit and see what you think about it. I think you'll come back to ride again.

With a name like “Protein Zone” I expected nothing but grit and grossness, as there's a level of that to be expected in any drink with that specific functionality. The picture of the banana and coconut on the label also had me weary. Coconut water is just fine, but anything that tastes even remotely like toasted coconut belongs in the filth bin, with all of the bananas on this planet. Thankfully the orange and pineapple that are also pictured carry most, if not all, of the added flavor. Sure, there is a texture to this that makes me feel like I took this to the beach and left the cap off as people walked by and kicked a bit of sand into it, but hey I'm strangely okay with that. It has a nice tropical flavor that makes up for the weird texture.

Some kids like to eat fruit. Take Danny. Little Danny only eats fruit and it's becoming a problem. He, like most kids, hates vegetables but unlike other kids, he also hates candy. He just never got it. He loved fruit, though. He would come home from school and if there was a fruit he could reach, he would eat it. This made his mother both very concerned and very angry. She was concerned because what mother wouldn't be if her son was not eating vegetables. She was angry because fruit doesn't come cheap and as Danny got taller, she would come home to less and less fruit because he could reach higher shelves and eat everything.

One day, Danny's mom put her foot down and limited him to a certain amount of fruit per day and in exchange, she bought him Litl' Squirts fruit juice. She told him that there was no funny business in it and that it was just fruits and water. He agreed to these new terms and took a bottle with him to his room.

He took a sip and loved it. It was naturally sweetened with fruit and it was actually a good tasting drink. He could taste the blueberries as well as the apple. It was like there was a mixologist somewhere that felt the way he did about fruit and made a drink specifically for him.

His mother noticed that there was more and more fruit around the house and talked to Danny about it. Danny said that although he cut down on eating fruit, he increased his liquid fruit intake. Confused, his mom opened up the cupboard and noticed that there was only two bottles left of the case that she had bought. She was raising a monster, an inconsiderate fruit monster.

Oh guava, you sassy girl. I feel that you are the most forgotten of the tropical fruits. It's not your fault. You are not to be forgotten. It's just that you are. You aren't doing anything wrong. Take this drink for instance. It's good. It's really good. I feel that it is a canned yet accurate portrayal of what you are like in real life. You know when they make biopics of people that are still alive and they get mad because everything was dramatized so much that it makes them look weak or like monsters? This drink, I feel, is "a day in the life" of you, guava. Why? Well the flavor isn't messed with, I don't think. It's filled with chunks and not just chunks of aloe, chunks of you, the fruit in questions. You provide and we make the most of what you give us. You are the lemon of fruits. You know that old phrase. If someone gives you lemons, you make lemonade. If someone gives you guaqva, you make a chunky guava drink. If I had a nickel for every time I've heard that phrase I think my check would be in the mail.

Aright folks, we're getting killed out there. This match is halfway over and we're down by a good amount, like a really decent amount. Like I'm almost ashamed to be leading you rag tag bunch of so and sos. Haven't you ever seen a movie? The miscreant underdogs are always supposed to win the big game so everyone can cheer and learn a valuable life lesson. The only reason I agreed to come on as couch was so I would have that moment. We'd come back for the win and everything would be moving in slow motion. Little Edwin with the limp, thick glasses and terrible fashion sense would be the one who scored the point and everyone would lift him up. Seriously though Edwin, did you steal those clothes from a 200 year old corpse? This was supposed to be a cathartic moment for all of us, and it looks like it's just not going to happen unless you change your ways.

I'm not going to lie kids, during most of that last period I wasn't even here. You were doing so terrible that I went to Starbucks to get some coffee. While I was there I saw that they have changed their brand of juice they carry. This one jumped out at me. Literally someone bumped into the display and it came flying right out at my face. Lucky for me I have such good reflexes. As this bottle of juice was flying at my face all I could see was “DEFENSE UP,” and I knew what I had to do. I dropped way more money than any of you are worth and I bought you each a bottle. Drink it up and we'll use the magical powers within to win this game. I'll be fair and tell you that our offense has been doing fairly decent, but our defense is lousing it up every chance they get. This mixture of oranges, pineapples, mangos, apples and acerola cherries will make sure that does not continue. I had one in the car on the way back to the game and I have to say it tastes like someone took some of the best orange juice this world has ever seen and upped it a notch. The orange is the main flavor by far, but the other fruits mix together to create a taste that complements it perfectly. It's so darn smooth I can't even handle it. It's juice the way it's supposed to be cold pressed with no sugar added. There's even some pulp in there, which makes it even better. It truly is the evolution of juice and it will evolve your playing as well. So, let's go out there and kick some butt, so we can all have our cinematic moment!


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Okay you guys, that was terrible. You did even worse than you did in the first half. Of course the magic powers didn't work Edwin, there are no magic powers, this is just some amazing juice, nothing more. I just thought that my little pep talk would give you the confidence you needed to win and at the end I would tell you it was in you all along and the juice had no special powers. I need to stop trying to live in movie land.

Oh Hansen's. You have done it again. You've conquered pop and now you have done nothing short of it with this juice. You've even cleverly disguised it as some sort of very Spanish drink with the fonts and colors and sun stuff. You've got it all under control. Oh, how is the taste? You nailed it. I'm telling you. If I didn't not like mango for the texture, I would easily have been converted. This is sweetened with cane sugar so it leaves me with a clean mango taste that doesn't taste candied or fake at all. It's quite refreshing to boot. I have read that mango is originally from India and the East but I think if the people who first tasted them tasted this, they would wonder a couple things. One would be what witchcraft you used to get their fruit in your bottle. The other would be that it tastes very good and then a whole rip in the fabric of time would happen and we would all never have mango. Please, for Jay more so than I. Do not go back in time and give bottles of this to the original harvesters of mango so that we may enjoy mango today.

Does anyone else have dreams of diving/swimming into an Olympic size swimming pool full of cranberries and water? I've never been to a cranberry farm, or whatever you call it, but it seems like it would be fun, and that the texture of the berries would just make the experience overall enjoyable. I just looked it up and a lot of the US's cranberries are relatively close to me, so I should really make it a mission to harvest some at some point in my life. Now back to my Scrooge McDuck fantasy (minus the doubloons). How awesome would that be? Cranberries are hard when they grow, so just think about fun water fights would be.

Speaking of that hardness, when I looked up how to juice cranberries everything said to boil them first. If that is the case, how to you have raw cranberry juice? My ladyfriend assures me that the insides of the berry are soft and juicy, and that is just has a harder outer shell. It's completely possible to squeeze the juice out. Me, I'm not so sure. I demand scientific proof, or you know would appreciate someone who is an authority explain it to me.

This may be the only time in the history of beverages that I would prefer that pineapple juice was not involved. Along with the cranberries and ginger that are this drink's namesake, there is also apple, black carrot, black currant and the previously mentioned pineapple juice in the mix. I have nothing against said juices, but the idea of pure cranberry juice with ginger ground into it without the addition of any sweetener leaves me with a fevered mind filled with the most wonderful tart burn anyone could ever imagine. Instead, the additional fruit sweeten it up a bit and there is a lack of a significant ginger burn. It's completely delicious, with the flavors names on the front of the bottle and the main players with the fruitiness in the background, but it just doesn't match what's floating around in my mind.

To summarize I want to be sipping on a beverage with a tart burn while floating around a swimming pool with a 2-3” layer of hard cranberries floating on the top. Is that my idea of heaven? It just might be.